its not fair to me to cry every day ( Read more... )

i'm almost disapointed
but not so bad because i'm not surprised
atleast i didn't completely waste my day i guess?

am i bi-polar?
why am i crying?
i thought it was going to be ok
i thought i was ok
but now ifind myself just as empty as i was before
and there's still no one there for me

i've lost everything now
it's like my whole life suffered some tragic fire
and i have nothing to start over with
what the fuck is going on?

my day was better than yours, trust me, it was, it didn't matter i was sick. i had my second half with me ( Read more... )

 i try so hard, without even realizing it, to impress you and make you proud of me ( Read more... )

some song is playing in the other room, some shit about love ( Read more... )

i still don't see anything i did wrong
i'm alright, right?
i'm not bad, right?

sorry for wanting to just live my life
i'm going to keep going on with whatever i'm gonna do
if you can't keep up, then back off
if my lifestyle is a problem for you then get over it
it's my choice

i'm sorry for how i'm acting
i'm sorry for how i am
i'm sorry for hurting you

it's so fucked up that i'm apparently not acting like myself around you
when i can do that solely around you

its fucked up that i treat you how i do and you just take it without even saying
a complaint to me

i don't quite understand me, i am changing, but it's more of an ( Read more... )

i'm trying to understand, but i can't
i don't know whats different

anyway
i slept at marissas
woke up, got checked out by mexicans (in my work uniform too)
went to work for four hours
drove around trying to figure shit out
and went to steves eventually after chilling
with ian sam alex justin mike anya every so few minutes?
finally stayed at steves
watched ( Read more... )

tomorrow is the day
it's real, it's coming up

i feel sick
i feel like shit
i am a shitty person