Ouch Ouch, you're on my heart.

It's a step.  I am moving forward.  I am really proud of myself.  I am sorry that I didn't know what I was doing.  But now I do.  You know it was going to happen eventually.  I was going to have to grow up and start to become the person I will eventually be and all of this is just helping me.  I cried so hard yesterday.  Harder than I ever have.  ( Read more... )

I feel like I am drowning. I can't breathe. I can't find the surface. I don't really want to. I want to stay under the water and drown there. I am not trying hard enough. Why can't I try harder, be stronger? I am sorry. I know I need to let it go and to move on but I can't. I am not as good as everyone else. I am not cut out for it. I ( Read more... )

Sooo I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything but damn that sucks.  Ouch.  Stab me in the heart.  Damnnnn.  People have really been surprising me lately.  In good ways and in bad.  I know for sure who has my back and who does not.  Marsh totally has my back and I know through one of the funniest things ever.  God I love that girl, it's not ( Read more... )

Seriously, who reads a million old Livejournal entries almost cries and cracks up like a hundered times.  What is wrong with me.  And serisouly who does that?  I need to get me a life.  How much are those these days?  And I am real pissed that oldnavy.com doesn't have any freaking men's black flip flops in a size 6.  All I want is some damn black ( Read more... )

I just realized something.  This whole time I thought stuff in my life was like a movie but that's bullshit.  Stuff in movies is like real life.  And that is why we love movies so much.  Because they really are very close to real life events.  Stuff like that actually happens in real life.  Like when you are thinking and a certain song will come on ( Read more... )

Monday, Tuedsay, Wednesday, and Thursday.  Oh Jesus.  Thats like all week and most of it has been spent with Rob.  What's going on?  Who knows.  I can't even put it into words anymore what I feel.  Like I love being with him and being around him but then like we are not a thing (well maybe a little) but it feels good when we are together.  I don't ( Read more... )

What the hell kind of person to people think I am?   I am not some door mat to be walked all over and used to do whatever they want.  I mush better than that.  I am much better than most of the shit that has happened to me.  This sucks so bad.  Well sorry but I don't do that kind of shit.  Rob was another story.  I loved him and he loved me and it ( Read more... )

Last night was pretty damn awesome if I do say so myself.  Ie feels goooooooood!!!!

-Juls!

I have never been broken hearted.  Like I thought I was but that was in middle school and I had never really loved anyone.  My first broken heart.  It hurts.  I feel like Bella Swan when Edward left her and told her straight to her face that he didn't love her anymore.  It left a hole in her heart.  She felt empty.  I can relate to Bella.  (That ( Read more... )