so i was told today that i am evil in its purest form. hmmm. its been a while since someones said that. maybe for a while there no one had the balls. i dunno. i feel weird though like i dont belong here. i probably dont. oh well. called my p.o. today, but she didnt answer her phone and never called me back (i left her a message). i dunno. i dunno. ( Read more... )

i feel like time is slippin through my fingers like little pieces of glass, ripping into my skin. i look at my hands but theres never any blood. i have these dreams about killin everyone and when i wake up i gotta look at my hands to see if it was real. i wish sometimes that it did happen, that i went on a murderous rampage door to door, beating ( Read more... )

these fuckers never listen, i say i dont wanna talk about somethin and they press me for details, i say dont cook more food cause i aint gunna eat it and they do. i dont wanna watch the movie but they make me. i duno. these fucks are makin me fat and lazy. i guess they feel bad cause i work with blacks like a black so... i been workin alot tryin to ( Read more... )

one day im gunno grow up one day im gunna be me let down my guard become the girl i wanna be. too tired

i fuckin hate it here. the scene is nonexistent, i suppose. i been here two and half weeks and havent seen one rock and roller. does anyone read this thing, i would suppose not. no one knows it exists... oh well maybe one day i'll have friends online. hehehe. this weeks been hell carlos is a bitch thinks he know everything about everything. too ( Read more... )

i feel so at odds with everything. ;ast night i found out my fake id works so yah that was great and i lost an hour, fuck daylight savings time and fuck a bunch of congress for taking two away. got called a slut, passed around on a phone to fuck knows who and hurt. i dont want to believe i was being lied to, but cant help to the he lied about the ( Read more... )

today went well. went to probo and they tell me my probate might not transfer to AR. i kinda hope it dont. i miss texas alot and i miss the people that i care about. i want everything to work out for me the best it can, but if i cant stay here i wont lose sleep.

yesterday was so so so sad. so many tears ran down these cheeks. wish it was different, wish i wasn't so meek. wish i had more power wish i had more time wish i had the life of that sweet boy of mine. wish tomorrow wouldn't come and yesterday never happened, wish it was two months ago when all this shit hadnt happened. wish my life was the same as ( Read more... )

tired and aggrivated dont know what to think anymore about anything and i am tired

i almost went to jail today. no really... not like i got a ticket or some bullshit, i almost had the cuffs around my wrist before Gunder stepped up and payed the fee... sigh... i really think that things would turn out better if i had gone.