let me just say..people who don't self-injure, don't understand. (unless you're the doc)

http://www.virtual-bubblewrap.com/index.shtml

i'm in a horrible mood. today at brenda's i happened upon a letter my sister had written to her. i don't even know what the succession of topics was, but somehow it was my sister playing her "woe is me, i had to do everything while my mom was sick and had no one to help me" game again. get over it! you were not the only one who did things. so you ( Read more... )

matt, my ex from five years ago stopped by my house this morning. i wasn't home from work just yet, but my stepdad talked to him for a minute. he's looking for me. and he stopped by my house again in the afternoon while i was back at work. he's looking for tommy and bobby, too. i don't know where they are. i went to gfs and james said he had come ( Read more... )

here i am at my worst...at my laid-out, bare-bones worst...so open and vulnerable and wishing you were able to see it. it's so thinly veiled. slide the curtain to the left, walk into the blinding light. i'm there, waiting for you to touch my soul. such innocent, pure love i have to offer you ( Read more... )

no motivation
no direction
no inflection
in my voice.

muted and
diluted with
dust upon my tongue.

i am aphonic.

on sunday, i met mo. we hung out and went to thai city. on the way there, a pigeon flew in front of the car. but instead of flying straight and missing the car, it flew forward then turned around...and SMACK! the poor birdie smashed right into the car and lost it's head. literally. of course i was laughing and screaming and in total shock. there ( Read more... )

from the poem Take Time Out by Maya Angelou:

Take a month
and show some kindness
for the folks
who thought that blindness
was an illness that
affected eyes alone.

from the poem Prescience by Maya Angelou:

Had I known that the heart ( Read more... )

i want to shut you out, shut everyone out, shut myself out. i don't want to feel this anymore. when i'm good, i'm good, but the lows are so fucking low. it's mostly when i have time to think...the times i can't distract myself from reality, from my fucking pathetic life. my beautiful face distorted by self-loathing. get your shit together, mel. get ( Read more... )

-begin transmission ( Read more... )