I was a child of the sea, 2013 November 4 (and 2).

Whether it has been two years or a lifetime, I always find myself back at the edge of the sea. As I let the waves crash against me, allowing them to wash away the fuck-ups that mark my soul and body-all broken skin and tainted blood-I begin to fear that it might not matter how many times I come back ( Read more... )

we come and go
like small, gentle waves
that linger and nudge at the sand
too shy to stay
too scared to say
we feel something deeper than what we show

we come and go
because that is all we can do

someone already walks on your shores

shoreline, 2013 october 11.

yesterday morning a forensic pathologist gave a lecture on sharp force and gun fire injuries. as one would expect, a good amount of time was spent talking about self-harm and suicide, complete with real photographs and stories of real life cases she had seen. it had my mind walking in tandem gait along the edge of a cliff. i could feel my facial ( Read more... )

just look at me
at twenty-three
crying like a loon
three times before noon

One can never really be sure whether each moment, each feeling, lasts an excruciatingly long second or an unbearably short lifetime.

I had always thrived on cramming, on sleeping through math and algebra, on never doing practice problems, on drawing chemical structures only an hour before the test or reading ten chapters in six hours and still acing an exam, on never finishing one read-through of all the lectures included in the coverage, on the pressure of cutting it too close ( Read more... )

For show and tell I bring regret,
Both a parasite and a pet,
From small ones that pick at the skin of my soul
To big ones that love to swallow me whole.

Found them in 2003; saw them in 2007; came back for more in 2013.
Med school in the morning; med school in the afternoon; saving rock and roll in the evening.
Because I cried like a baby when they played Save Rock and Roll during the encore.Thank you for coming back, Fall Out Boy ( Read more... )

subtle he's subtle she's subtle knees subtle please subtle tease

how scary it is to realize you no longer give as much of shit about something you used to care so much about, how scary it is to feel all that warmth seeping out of you.