i need a hug

i haven't cried in a while and it's all because i start remembering all the little things and then some other crap that is just complete bullshit but i couldn't ever tell him about it, he'd probably get irritated at me but right now he can go fuck himself. but all the stuff i remind myself of just make me feel lower then low, life has never been ( Read more... )

sick of being on the back burner

so yay! had a band concert tonight and it was kindof entertaining and then i got to go to big boy with a bunch of friends home from college. it was fun! i was able to finally relax but that basically ended when i got home and then i remember the things i stress about and i die a little bit inside ever second from it. well i got to get my mind off ( Read more... )

i don't understand why people have to make things their problem when it's not their problem because it has nothing to do with them. they then try and tell you how to fix the problem and then if you don't do what they say they just about blackmail you and then they only think there is one solution that basically is the worst idea ever! it's very ( Read more... )

what's the point anymore? all i end up doing is dissapointing everyone and whenever i say something it is always taken the wrong way and misunderstood. so what's the point of trying anymore? i might as well become a vegetable or something and never speak, all i end up doing is making things worse then they already were and i just end up hurting ( Read more... )

so ever since i had learned my grandma died i have been in an odd mood, it kindof started a little before that happened but not much before. i've just been in this mood where i don't have a lot of emotion for things i usually do. no guilt, no ultra excitment, no nothing, i've just been pretty distant to even mysself. i really don't think it has ( Read more... )

so this is one of my favorite songs and for the first time i actually really really listened to the lyrics and i love them so i thought i'd share ( Read more... )

so right now i'm at mott for a art day camp and were working on the computer so i am able to write this. so i just found out that my grandma died, my dad's mom. she's the one who we all expected to die soon and the ones who lived here for a month and the one who had alziehmers. i was kindof close to her when i was really little but not even that ( Read more... )

tonight matt did something so sweet and adorable. he'd been planning on it for a long time when he learned he wasn't gonna be around for fourth of july. he was planning this huge surprise which used to be bigger then what he did tonight but i really don't care, i'm easy to please. but i kindof guessed to from the beginning because he kept asking me ( Read more... )