Taking it to the grave (Matsumiya, Yama, AibaxBecky) Part 1

[doctoggy]

Title:Taking it to the grave
Author(s): doctoggy
Artist: alienashi
Disclaimer: I own nothing. At all. All events within are fictional.
Type: Angst. OMG so much angst.
Word Count: 16400ish
Characters/Pairings: Yama (side), Matsumiya (main), AibaxBecky, Fujigayax???
Warnings: minor character death, lots of talk of illness, suffering, comas and almost dying.
Summary: In a world where everyone has a soulmate, you would not think it would be so hard to find them. But the powers that bind souls are powerful, and unduly influencing a bonding with confessions of being soulmates was strictly forbidden. Jun had long since known that his friend and business partner Nino was his soulmate, but Nino professed not to believe in love, and reminds Jun constantly that he has no need of a soulmate. So what it Jun to do when this very fact may cost him his life?
Author’s Notes: Based on a soulmates AU prompt from a long long long long time ago. The idea has been floating around for a while, but I lacked time and the ability to just write it.  Also, Random pseudo steampunkish, fantasy like AU. Thanks to thoroughlynerdy for the beta and putting up with my constant but the story wont cooperate ness, and thanks to boblemon for being awesome and encouraging.]
Link to Art Master Post: This is part of the bigbang_je project, so when I have the art, I will post that as well. :)


Sometimes Jun cursed the unfairness of life, in particular the unfairness of his life.

It was not that this life was bad, far from it, he had a group of very good friends here in the city. Masaki and his wife Becky, while draining due to their exorbitant amounts of energy, were both amazing friends, and amazingly loyal, and Jun owed them more than they knew. Toma was also among his closest friends here, though he had not started out that way. Kazunari (Kazu by those close to him and Nino to everyone else) had been friends with him first. As close as Nino and Jun were (starting as roommates in college and then business partners, and now flat mates (mostly because Nino was tight with their money, and they owned the rooms above the tea and gaming shop that they ran, so why spend money elsewhere?)) those people who were Nino’s friends inevitably became Jun’s friends.

And then there was Nino himself. They had been roommates their first semester of university together and while Jun had never intended to start a business at all, what they had now made sense for both of them. It just sucked sometimes since the moment Jun had met Nino he had been convinced that there was something special about him. The way his eyes had sparkled, a smirk melting into a genuine smile that startled Jun. The surprise had turned to affection, and the affection to love. By the end of their second year Jun was convinced that he and Nino were soulmates. He would not, and could not ever tell Nino that, and to make matters worse was the fact that Nino wanted none of that, which posed a slight problem.

Soulmates were commonplace in their world. Aiba and Becky were an example that true love did existed. When you found that person, you just knew. Your soul knew it as well, bonding itself to the other person.

Which was where Jun’s problem started. He had managed to bind himself to someone who had no idea that Jun loved him, and worse than that, no interest in love. In an ideal world, he would just confess. But it this time and place, it couldn’t just be as simple as asking Nino to give him a chance. It didn’t work like that.

You knew when your soul bound itself to another, but it was never something that the other person knew. They had to come to the realization on their own, understanding that they loved you and needed you as much as you needed them. Being in an unrequited soul bonded relationship was dangerous, as your life was now tied to the life of the other person. People died of unrequited soul bonding, when the person they would bound too traveled far away, and the poor soul was left to waste away until they had no life left in them.

The simple solution to preventing this would just be to tell the other person that you were soulmates and be done with it, but forcing someone into a soul bonding was against the law, and punishable by death. Death, was it turns out, the only was to undo a soul bonding. Even after soul bonding, people could realize that they were incompatible, and they could fall in love again, with other people. It just wouldn’t be their soul mate, perhaps just their best friend. In the case of Nino’s parents, the person that the other loved to hate.

Which was why Jun’s life was in a difficult position. He was, and had been, soul bonded to Nino since their second year of college. Over ten years ago. He had watched him go out on dates with people, seen him bring people back to their apartment. Heard him profess that soul bonding was ridiculous because his parents were soul bonded yet they still divorced, and miserable because of it, so there was no way in hell that he would ever bond himself to anyone. And Jun believed him. He had dropped girls, and guys, who had dared suggest that they become serious about each other.

He knew that Nino would never return his feelings, and he had ten years to accept that, even if it felt as though his heart was ripped out of his chest every time that Nino brought someone home. He fled the house, going to Aiba and Becky’s, or out with Toma to drink himself into obliviousness on those nights. Even though Jun knew that Nino would never love him back, he could not help but hope that one day Nino would realize just how important Jun was to him. But ten years into a one sided love, he was beginning to lose hope.

“You are opening in the morning, right Jun?” Nino called from the door to the kitchen, a dishcloth in his hand, and Jun nodded, not looking away from where he was cleaning tables in the café. They had run a special event that day, focusing on magic and magic tricks, and there had been more people interested than they (mostly Nino) had expected. Jun knew what a draw Nino was to customers, and he was quite certain that the increase in customers, especially females, was due to Nino putting his skills and talents on display. His card based magic tricks were usually something that he reserved as party tricks for their friends, but the customers had loved it, many of the females pressing Nino to show them more tricks later. He had refused them all, saying that he was too busy with the shop, and that he did not mix business with pleasure (both lies Jun knew, but he was still relieved that he would not have to deal with Nino bringing someone else home).

“Toma should be here early to help me with the baking and things, so you should get to sleep in for a change.” Jun called back, moving to clean the final table in the café. He still needed to sweep and mop, and prep the kitchen and dough for the morning.

“But-“ Nino started and Jun shook his head.

“It is your birthday. Toma and I can handle the shop for a few hours. I would insist that you take the entire day off, but we both know that you would end up down here regardless. This way at least you get to rest some.”

“Thank, Jun. You are a good friend.” Nino yawned, not bothering to cover his mouth with a hand, and tossed the towel into the laundry basket in the kitchen before shuffling over to the stairs. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Mmmm.” Jun answered with a nod, and a glance at the clock. “Happy birthday, Kazu.”

“Thanks.” His voice called back, muffled by the stairway passage, and Jun could hear the weariness in his voice.

Nino never liked a huge fuss being made about him by the people he cared about, let alone customers, so Jun was sure the day had been draining on him. He still needed to make a cake for Nino, so it would be ready in the morning. It was something that Nino had protested the first three years that Jun had done it, when they had been at university, but it was a tradition now, and every year when Nino woke up for his birthday there was a cake waiting for him. This year would be no different though it would mean that Jun did not get any sleep that night. Nino didn’t have to know that, though Jun was certain that he would figure it out soon enough, as it was obvious to all when Jun did not sleep. But the smile on Nino’s face as he took the first bite of the melon cake was worth it every single year.

Each year he poured his love and feelings into the cake, and each year Nino commented that the cake was more delicious than the last. Though each year his feelings failed to reach Nino as more than an increasingly delicious cake.  Maybe this year would be different.

It was late after business hours when the phone rang, unusual since no one ever called the shop, all of their friends just came by. Shuffling away from their friends, Jun answered the phone, letting Nino continue to celebrate with their friends. He and Masaki were in the middle of trying to convince Toma that he wanted to serenade them with a song, offering up some of the most ridiculous reasons they could think of to motivate him. The obvious one, that it was Nino’s birthday, never came up.

Initially no one noticed that Jun had paled, talking softly into the receiver and taking a deep breath before setting the receiver down on a table, the person on the other end waiting. His face was schooled into a neutral expression as he walked back towards the party.

“Kazu, it’s Sho. He needs to talk to you.”

Nino’s gaze was sharp as he looked towards Jun, who didn’t say anything, just met his gaze, and the smile faded from Nino’s face as he all but ran to the phone.

“Is everything alright?” It was Toma who broke the silence as Jun sat down on one of the chairs, watching Nino talking into the receiver, taking in the way that he sank down against the wall, the receiver cradled to his ear, what little color he did have fading from his skin.

Jun could not bring himself to answer as he watched Nino say goodbye, and the receiver fell from his shoulder, as he curled forward, burying his head in his arms.

“I hate to cut this short, but I think it would be best if we ended things here for the night.” Jun finally spoke, and the others didn’t argue, gathering their things and heading out the door, Jun following them.

“Oh, Toma.” He called softly, as the last made to leave the shop, and Toma paused, looking at Jun.

“Something happened to Satoshi, didn’t it?”  Toma’s voice was soft and Jun sighed.

“The shop will be closed for a while, at least until we get back.” Jun dropped his voice more, “Satoshi’s parents were killed and Sho isn’t sure if Satoshi will ever wake up. He isn’t sure if their bond is strong enough to repair the damage. Usually it would be, but apparently Satoshi is pretty bad. You know that Kazu will want to be there, and I will be going with him, for as long as he will let me stay.”

Toma paled, but nodded. “Our thoughts will be with all of you.” He glanced to Nino, who hadn’t stirred from where he sat against the wall and Jun nodded, locking the door after the shop assistant.

Slow steps took him over towards Nino, where he hung up the phone receiver, kneeling down in from of Nino.

“I can pack everything that we need, and we will be on the first train in the morning.” Jun’s voice was soft and when Nino replied, he had to struggle to make out the words.

“I will be fine going alone.” Jun could hear the quaver in his voice, he knew that the other had been crying, though he would never admit it.

Jun glared at Nino, shaking his head, knowing that the other wouldn’t see it.

“I will be going with you. Between the funeral arrangements, and getting Satoshi from the hospital to their house, Sho will have his hands full. I want to be there, for you, and for Satoshi. He is a good friend, Kazu.”

Nino didn’t reply for a moment, taking deep breaths in and out, and Jun was not sure if the other was crying again, or if he was going to try and be stubborn, but after a moment his voice was soft.

“You are a good friend.”

True to his word, Jun took care of all the travel arrangements. The train would take them most of the day up the mountain, if the weather was good. It wasn’t rainy season so they didn’t have to worry about flooding yet. They were on the first train, a large trunk packed for Nino, and a smaller travel bag for Jun.

He had meant it when he said that he would be going with Nino. There was no way that he would let the other go alone. When Nino’s parents separated they had both remarried, and his mother had settled down in the small mountain town that they were headed to now, while he father had settled in a nearby town. Close enough that their separation wouldn’t kill them through the soul mate bond, but far enough that they could lead separate lives. It was there that Nino had met Satoshi Ohno.

The two had been friends from most of Nino’s life, supporting him when at 12 his mother and step father vanished, from their house. They hadn’t left a note, or told anyone where they were going, but there was an envelope full of some money, and information about a bank account, in the name of Kazunari Ninomiya.

His father hadn’t been any help in the matter, but he had at that point been drinking himself to a slow death, and the news of his soul mate’s disappearance as much of a relief to him as it was an announcement of his impending death.

Nino had shut himself away in his mothers house for days after talking to his father, until Satoshi and his mother had come by, and forcefully moved the young man into their house. With the loss of both of Nino’s parents, the Ohno’s became his new family, and Satoshi his brother. At first Nino had clung to Satoshi, never letting the other out of his site, and when Sho had come into the picture at first Nino had resisted, terrified for love, and soulmates, and what it would mean for his friendship with Satoshi if the other fell in love. However moving away for college, and making friends had allowed Nino to see that what Satoshi and Sho had was a good thing. Nino had moved out of the Ohno’s house after college, starting the shop with Jun, but he talked to them weekly, and went home as often as he thought the shop could spare him.

To hear that there had been an accident, and that Mr. and Mrs. Ohno had died, and that Satoshi had not woken up, and it was unclear if he would ever wake up, was horrible news. Jun was certain that Nino would not leave Satoshi’s side until the other woke up, and even then, Jun was not sure if Nino would be willing to return to the city and their business. And he did not blame him.

It would just cause some issues.

But he was not thinking about that yet.

True to his word, while Nino sat in vigil by Ohno’s bed, Jun helped Sho with the arrangements for getting Satoshi home, for the funeral and viewing, personally took care of the food for the memorial, and made sure that Sho was as stress free as one could be organizing the funeral for the parents of their soul mate.

But now that it was over, and things were settling down, Jun really had a chance to look at how things were with Satoshi. No one was quite sure how it had happened, but the horses that had been pulling that carriage that the Ohno’s took their usual Sunday afternoon ride in had spooked, going off the road and throwing the family. Satoshi had been thrown free of the carriage, hitting his head against a tree. His parents had not been so lucky. But since the accident, Satoshi had made no signs of waking up, and though both Nino and Sho spent all of their time by his side, no one knew what the future held.

Leaning on the railing of the porch, looking out towards the setting sun, Jun was not surprised when Nino came up to him, leaning against the railing with a tired sigh.

“I will be staying here, you know.” His voice was weary, and Jun nodded. He had known when they were still in the city that Nino wouldn’t leave Satoshi.

“I-I need you go to back and take care of the shop. Other than Satoshi it is the only thing that I have in the world. And I know that Toma cannot run the place by himself, as hard as he tries.”

“I want to be here though, until I know something about Satoshi.”

“Why, this isn’t your family. This isn’t your house. There is nothing for you here.” His voice was sharp. “Your family is down in the city, our store is down in the city. I need you to make sure that I have something left in this life Jun.”

“I-“ Jun started to speak but Nino placed a hand on his arm, silencing him.

“Go home, Jun. What good can you do here?” Nino’s voice was sharp stepped back into the house, and Jun did not move from the patio, leaning heavily against the railing.

What good indeed. There was no good that he could do for Satoshi, for Sho, or even for Nino except being a friend, and being supportive.

“You can always find reasons to come back here, to check on things.”  Sho’s voice was soft and Jun nodded. “And I know that you care for Satoshi. You have been our friend all of these years.”

Jun nodded. “I can find reasons, at least until the rainy season.” Jun’s voice was soft and Sho hmmed beside him.

“You could just tell him, Jun. It has been ten years.”

“I wont force him to love me, I refuse to do that to him. You know the rules, Sho. He has to figure it out on his own.”

Sho was silent for a moment, his hands tightly grasping the railing, and his voice was so low that Jun had to strain to hear it.

“And it will destroy him if he realizes that he caused you harm. You would be doing what his parents did to him, in some way. Jun, there has to be some other way.”

Jun was silent for a long moment.

“Well, then, Satoshi will just have to wake up before that happens. Thank you for your hospitality Sho. You have enough to worry about with Satoshi, don’t worry about me. I can take care of myself.” Jun turned, leaning against the railing and looking at Sho, who was looking out onto the horizon.

“I have managed for these past years, and I will do so now. Kazu is right, I have no real reason to stay. And the store should be my focus.” Jun braced his hands on the railing and pushed off, though he did not walk away. “Besides, he made it very clear that other than Satoshi, the store is the only other thing he has in this world. He doesn't want me here, doesn't need me here. So I will go take care of our store. For as long as I can. And then I will leave first thing in the morning. It would be best if I left before Kazu gets up in the morning.”

“Best?” Jun could hear Sho’s voice cracking, and he wondered for a moment, if there was anything he could to do help. They were placing Sho in a hard place, one where his soul mate lay on a bed, and no one was sure if he would ever wake up, and one where a friend was essentially choosing to die.

“Best for me. Easiest for us both.” Jun sighed. “I will come back a few times before the flooding makes it impossible, if necessary.”

Sho nodded. “You are always welcome here, no matter what Jun.”

“Thank you.” The smile that Jun turned towards Sho was blindingly wide. “Satoshi will be fine. And I have faith in Kazu. Even after all these years. It will all work out in the end.”

As he said it, he truly meant it.

Jun had never met anyone who had died of an unrequited soul bonding, so he was not really sure what to expect from the entire process. About half an hour down the mountain on the train he had been hit with a wave of dizziness, and nausea. When that receded a feeling of unease settled in his stomach that did not seem to fade.

Settling back into things with the shop was easier than he expected, but Toma was around all the time, helping pick up the slack where Nino usually would be. Becky helped out when she could, though she tired easily these days. She glowed though, and both she and Masaki were thrilled to be expecting their first child in a few months. Usually she helped out at Masaki’s medical clinic, helping with the office work and things, but they had both decided that the shop would need more help, with Nino being gone for an unknown amount of time.

Jun appreciated the help, but it didn’t make the house any less empty at night, when he and Toma closed up the shop and Jun shuffled back to the living space. He slept more these days, and their friend attributed it to not having Nino around to entertain him, but all he knew is that he always felt tired.

He talked to Nino on the phone every few days, and Sho would call and ask how things were when Nino would go to the store for food. And Jun was mostly honestly with him.

So far things are good. I am tired. I can never seem to get enough rest.

Sho would give him updates, as well as Nino.

Satoshi moved today. He stirred a little. That is a good sign.

We just have to wait for him to wake up.

Jun thought he might want it more than Nino and Sho.

It took until about a month and a half for people to start noticing that perhaps Jun wasn’t just missing his best friend and business partner.

Toma noticed first, since Toma spend the most amount of time with him. He noticed the way that Jun was getting later and later into the shop in the morning, even though he lived in the shop. His movements were a little slower, had a little less energy, and while his smiles were still blinding for the customers, they faced more quickly than they use to, as Jun leaned heavily against the door in the kitchen away from the customers eyes and drawing in a deep breath.

“You aren’t ok.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement. Toma hovered over Jun, blocking the taller man from leaving from the kitchen and back into the café, and Jun didn’t bother arguing with Toma.

“I am doing the best that I can.” Jun’s voice was soft and Toma drew in a breath, as if he had expected Jun to deny what was obvious, so make up an excuse as for why the other seemed to be slowly fading.

“He is killing you.” His words were the softest whisper and Jun shrugged.

“He has nothing to do with this. It was my choice to listen to his request, to do this. I chose to listen and come back, instead of letting him realize why I didn’t want to come back. I am doing it to myself, really.” Jun pushed off of the wall, crossing his arms over his body at Toma rounded on him, moving closer until Jun was pressed back against the counter.

“You could go visit. Something. You-“ He trailed off, not wanting to say the words, and Jun shook his head, watching the hope fade from Toma’s face.

“I can’t. When things started getting worse for me I talked to Sho about it. But the rains had just started and the trains won’t start running until the flooding stops. To get up there I would have to hire a stagecoach, and if I did that….” Jun trailed off and Toma sighed, leaning back against the opposite counter.

“Then Kazu would know just how determined you were to get up there, and start asking questions and…”

“I won’t force him to love me. I knew when I came back this would happen. I just-“ Jun ran a hand through his hair, allowing for once the sadness to break through into his visage. “I don’t know how to tell him that I broke all the promises that we made.”

Toma couldn’t hide his laugh.

“He made you do those as well?”

Jun nodded, his voice soft. “First, never fall in love with me, as I don’t believe in love.”

“Never abandon me,” Toma added, “since we are in this together or not at all. I wont let someone else walk away from me.”

“And don’t lie to me.” They both said together and Jun couldn’t hold back the choked bitter laugh.  It happened our second year of university. When I made him those promises I had every intention of keeping them except…”

“You can’t choose who you are soul bonded too.” Toma walked back towards the door. “We can talk more about this later, since now you have someone to talk to. But who knows?”

“You, Sho and Satoshi. No one else. Since the more people who know, the more likely he is to find out, and I refuse to do that to him.”

“Masaki will be heartbroken, as he will be your doctor.” Toma didn’t turn around, but he heard Jun choke on his breath.

“Satoshi will wake up, and Kazu will come home, and Masaki won’t have to.” Jun’s voice lacked the conviction it had those weeks ago when he spoke to Sho, but Toma nodded, and flashed Jun a hopeful smile.

“If anyone can prevent something that he isn’t aware of, its Kazu.”

Becky was the next to notice, since the further she got along in her pregnancy the less she worked, as she got tired easily. So she viewed Jun with fresh eyes that most of the rest of their friends didn't have. She didn't say anything to him, but one day during a slow afternoon as he was talking on the phone with Nino, something must have shown in his face, because she gasped quietly, mumbling an Oh Jun before sinking down in a chair, one hand over her mouth, the other pressed over her stomach. She didn't say anything more than that, just watched him as he talked on the phone, and when he hung up the phone she stood, following him into the kitchen.

She still didn't say anything, just pulled him into a hug, her eyes wide and watery with tears that she tried not to cry in front of him.

“I can’t help out much around the store, but I will do what I can.” Was her comment and Jun nodded.

“Right now Toma is doing as much as he can, more than I can hope. But I don't know how much longer I can keep things open. As long as I can.”

“You will have to tell Masaki.” Her voice was soft and Jun nodded.

“I was hoping that it won’t get to that point.” Jun sighed. “But it gets harder every day. And I know there is nothing that he can do…..”

“He will want to be there for you. So you aren’t alone.” There was a catch to her voice when she spoke the last word and Jun nodded.

“It won’t get to that. I have faith that Satoshi will wake up. And Kazu can come home.”

“But can you last out the rainy season?” Becky spoke her thoughts aloud. “Kazu is cheap, and while he loves this store, he loves Satoshi more than anything. He would use it as an excuse to stay with Satoshi, I think.”

Jun shrugged. “Sho and Satoshi would do what they could to prevent that, I think, but there is only so much anyone can do without telling him.”

“And you don't want to do that to him.”

“I can’t.” Jun replied, “I just-“ He stopped when the phone rang again, and Becky shuffled out of the kitchen, following Jun. She rushed, as much as a pregnant women could, over to him when he sank to the ground, the phone receiver cradled against his ear, and she could see tears in his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Becky took the phone receiver from Jun when he couldn't answer, repeating her question into the receiver and she could hear Nino’s voice over the phone, cracking slightly.

Satoshi woke up, but he can’t really speak or anything. Just stares around the room, looks at Sho, though he seemed to recognize my voice. But he is awake.

“That is wonderful!” Becky forced all the cheer she could muster into her voice. “So then you are coming back down here? We miss you. Masaki especially. We would both like you here for the birth of our child you know.” She kept her voice light, though she could not keep the frown off of her face as Nino spoke.

No, I want to stay here until Satoshi is completely OK. I don't think he realized that he lost his parents that day. Or much of anything. He was there for me when my parents died, so I want to be there to support him as well.

“That makes sense.” Becky replied. “But what about the shop? And Jun? It is getting a bit much for just Toma and Jun to handle, since all I do is waddle around the shop and wipe down tables these days.”

Nino laughed into the phone.

I know that J will make it work. He has always been there for me when I needed him. It is one of the reasons I agreed to open the store with him. Right now I need him to watch the store. I don't know what I would do without Satoshi though. So I cannot leave until I know that he is OK, and that things will be all right. I know that J understands. He knows how important Satoshi is to me. He is all that I have left.

Becky made a hmming noise. “We all know how important Satoshi is to you, Kazu. I hope that he heals quickly and that you come home.”

Satoshi will do things as his own pace. He always has. But Sho and I will be here with him. But I need to go. Make sure that J is ok? I know that he cares a lot about Satoshi as well, so it’s probably hard for him to be down there. I know that Sho keeps him updated on things. If he had a choice he would want to be up here supporting Satoshi as well, but I need him at the shop and I am sure that he understands.

“We are all taking good care of the shop for you. So hurry back to it.” Becky’s voice was light. “Give Sho and Satoshi all of our love.”

Of course. I will so what I can do for coming down for the baby. Let me know when, but the flooding might make it hard. The roads are so dangerous these days, and since it was a carriage accident that killed the Ohno’s parents I don't want to take too many changes.

“Of course. I will check with Masaki and let you know for sure. He keeps changing the due date. Seems he cannot decide exactly when it was we conceived. But I think he is just doing it to keep me from worrying too much about it. Take care, Kazu.” Becky gently hung up the receiver before sinking down on the floor slowly. She settled against the wall beside Jun, and was how surprised when he leaned against her, his head on her shoulder.

“He isn’t going to come back down in time, is he?” Jun asked, as if Becky knew the answer, as if she could predict how soon he would finish fading and she shouldn't answer him. “I figured that he wouldn't, but there was no way to be sure. But now….” Jun sighed. “I am sure that Sho will talk to him, and try and get him to come down here for a little while, but you know how Kazu is.”

“You could go up there?”

“It is dangerous. Just like Kazu said. It is the same reason that he won’t come down here. And going would mean that he would know.”

“Him coming back here and seeing you like this, it will also let him know. There is no way at this point that he won’t find out, I don't think. So why not save yourself?”

“Because a promise is a promise. And while I will break two of them, the one that is most important to him I refuse to break.” Becky didn't ask which promise, since she as well as anyone knew the promises that Nino required of those close to him, they all knew how seriously he took those promises.

“I think, Jun, that ‘don’t leave me alone’ would slightly win out over ‘don’t fall in love with me.’”

Jun choked on a bitter laugh, and Becky could feel the trembling of his body. She was certain that he was crying, though he did not shift from where he was leaning against her shoulder, and if the sleeve of her dress was a little damp, well that did not matter.

“He told you, and he told me weeks ago, that Satsohi and the store are the things that matter to him. As long as the store is fine, and Satoshi is fine, Kazu will carry on. I am sure of it.”

“I am not so sure.” Her voice was soft, and she looked up as the door to the shop opened, and her husband walked in. Masaki’s eyes took one look at the pair of them, sitting on the floor, the sadness on Becky’s face and the tears on Jun’s, and no one could blame him for assuming the worst.

“What happened to Satoshi?” He scrambled over to them, sinking down onto the floor in front of his wife and she shook her head, smiling thinly.

“He woke up, but all he can see is Sho, all he seems to know is Sho, for the moment. Kazu said he isn’t speaking much right now. And that he will stay there until he is certain that Satoshi remembers. Sho and Kazu think that Satoshi doesn't yet realize that his parents died.”

“It is great that he is awake though!” Masaki looked from Becky to Jun, and the smile faded from his face slowly. Becky could see the quizzical doctor look fall into place as he took Jun in from head to toe. Noting that his clothes seemed loose on his frame. The pallor of his skin which had nothing to do with the fact that he had been crying. The way that his veins were a pale blue visible up against his skin, and he looked at Becky, his eyes wide.

She nodded, her smile sad, and it was Masaki who pulled Jun into a hug, squeezing the other man tightly. Jun didn't fight the embrace, but Becky could see the moment that the other man broke, as Masaki’s soft and raspy voice carried to her ears.

“You have been so strong Jun. Just a little bit longer now. You have to hold on for a little while more.”

But the slight hopelessness in Masaki’s eyes as he caught her gaze gave him away. As she had earlier he could feel how thin Jun was, how weak he was, and as she closed her eyes, Becky could feel the tears welling there.

Somehow, this had to work out.

~~~ ~~~  ~~~ ~~~
“We will be fine here Kazu. Go home and rest a bit, check and make sure the restaurant hasn't burned down.” Sho commented not for the first time but Nino just shook his head, continuing to sit in a chair in the corning of the room.

Since Satoshi had woken up from his coma all he had done was sleep, and upon waking the only words that he could seem to form were Sho. Sho was always there, squeezing his hand, whispering words of encouragement. Every time that Sho would try and leave when Satoshi was awake the other would start to tremble, to panic, looking around the room anxiously, and nothing but Sho seemed to calm him. As far as Nino knew, Satoshi did not realize that his parents were gone, and he didn't seem to recognize him at all. Which was hard. Satoshi was the only family that he had left in the world, and while he wasn't related by blood, Satoshi and his parents had been the best things to happen to Nino. There was no way that he was going anywhere until he was sure that Satoshi remembered him. It didn't matter how long that took. Without Satoshi, he was left with nothing.

He had the store, and he had friends. But Satoshi was the only constant in his life. That and Jun. Jun had been there since university, most of his friends down in the city had. But Jun had been his roommate, then his business partner, and he knew that Jun would not do anything that would jeopardize their business. Jun knew how much it meant to Nino that things keep running well, and that they worked in his absence. And of everyone, Jun was the only one who wasn't really pressuring him to come back down. Jun understood him, and that was what he needed right now.

He wasn't sure what he would have done with the café if Jun had not been there. It would have had to close down indefinitely. Maybe he would have sold it, or at least rented out the rooms above the shop for a while. Since moving home to be with Satoshi was never a question. But he did not have to think about those things, because he had Jun.

He was sure that he would always have Jun. Jun had never seemed interested in finding his soulmate, and everyone knew how Nino felt on the matter, so no one ever brought it up. But Jun never even seemed to date, devoting himself to his studies, and then their business. He would sometimes go home on short trips, sometimes take a short vacation to the mountains off the coast, but never more than a few days.

“My most important thing is here.” He would say, when Nino would encourage him to take some time off, when he looked a little too run down and ragged, and who was Nino to argue with that, since the store was important to him as well. He was so grateful for Jun.

The younger man had been on his mind a lot these days, and he wasn't really sure why. He had a lot of time to sit and think, since Satoshi still slept a lot. And sometimes, when the looks between Sho and Satoshi got too tender, when Sho’s whispered words became too soft or too private for Nino to listen in on he would leave then alone. He would wait until Sho shuffled down to the kitchen to rummage for ingredients for a sandwich, or continued trying to run his families trading business from the study before wandering back upstairs to sit with Satoshi. But when he was alone, Jun was especially on his mind. He was calling less. And when Nino would call, asking to check up on the store, or how things were, Jun always sounded a bit distracted. Toma or Becky would end up taking over the phone call, filling Nino in on the little details of the store, the happenings of the customers, business that day. At the end of the conversation, they would always wish him well, and ask him to come home soon. And his answer was always the same.

Not until I know that Satoshi is alright. Not until I know that he remembers me.

But at the end of the conversation, he realized that he didn't know a thing about how Jun was doing. How he was holding up running the café with Toma and a very pregnant Becky He could read Jun’s smile through the phone. The small laughter carrying over the line when Nino would recount Sho’s latest culinary masterpiece, and insistence that he could and would cook meals. But he didn't know how Jun was. Which was strange. Jun was always so straightforward with him. It was slightly concerning.

These thoughts would disappear as soon he was back beside Satoshi. Talking to the other man who stared at the ceiling but didn't say a word. Didn't response to anything that he said. The doctors said that he was still healing. They also said that he would take a lot of energy from Sho while things healed, and any brain damage that he had sustained would heal over time. As a result, they had warned, Sho would also be tired, as Satoshi would be using much of his lover’s strength while he healed, they thought. But this sort of thing didn't happen often. Sho did sleep a lot more, sharing the bed with Satoshi, the two of them curled up in the tiny bed without a care in the world.

But in spite of this, all Satoshi could seem to remember was Sho.

Satoshi had to remember him.

He just had too. Nino wouldn't leave until he was sure that what remained of his family was intact.

Find part 2 here!