The Thing Is...

[dopeynowhere]

... I've been trying to get my life together. No really. I'm going to be 40 in 6 months, and while it's easy to say "Oh, it's just a number,," you'll find that most of the people saying that are not acually closing in on it. I just want some basic things. I want a decent place to live, a car, a decent job, shoot - maybe even an actual career

Comments

[manraysky]

Is twice within the acceptable range for being drunk at work?

I'm so sorry to hear that. It sounds like a nightmare work situation. But I'm really sorry that you are left jobless.

What kind of work are you looking for, more bartending? I'll let you know if I hear of anything.

[dopeynowhere]

Eh, no biggie, really. It's the first time I've been handed my walking papers. I've been working since 1984. But whatev. Thanks, bartending is what I'm most qualified for, and what I'd make the most money at, but I'm keeping an open mind. This is just horrible timing though -- no savings, nuthin'. It totally was a nightmare situation. I didn't want to rat the bar manager out, and it wound up costing me my job. The funny thing is, I'm not particularly depressed. I've been low in life and this ain't it. I'll find sompin'... more time to feed the birdies dood! (I got a 5 pound sack a "Prety Boy" wild bird seed sittin' here next to my desk) :)

[tikireaper]

Jaysus Christ in the marnin, whatta bunch of assholes!
I'm so sorry.

[dopeynowhere]

Thanks. It's just a job. The only thing that got me was the personal insult - I've been bartending for years. I've still got the bookstore on Sundays. I'm gonna see about picking up a coupla shifts over at Fisherman's Grotto. It doesn't pay much, but it should keep me afloat until something else comes along..

[sparrow_fox]

I think that it is nearly impossible to find a long term job these days if you are unable to operate in a fake or contrived manner. I've wondered often if I have some kind of personality disorder because I can't just go along with everything and be easy going.

You weren't meant to be there. And while that is no consolation as you're starving and wondering how to pay your rent, it's a fact. Something will come up. It has to. Just learn what you can from this life so you don't have to take it into the next one. That's what I tell myself when I start to feel really down. I just try to remember that I'm just working shit out based on what I didn't learn during my last life.

♥ I'm thinking about you. It's tough. Life.

[bonniegrrl]

which bar was this, so i can avoid it!

[dopeynowhere]

Har! It's Tiernan's, across from the Buena Vista -- which is WAY better anyway.. :)

[echocracker]

jesus. What a shitty experience. I know how it feels to just walk into a place feeling fucking weirded out by the fact that you have to be new and deal with all of that crap and for me deal with the fact that everyone around me in alomst have my age at times. I am TRYING to stay positive. It's hard sometimes. YOu cool man. Fuck da police. I'm a teenager.

[dopeynowhere]

Thanks, Echo. You know, one of the benifits of having been through the ringer a few times in life, is that you are fairly well-equiped to deal with occasional raw deals like this. I'm oddly not that down about it, and sort of mysteriouisly relieved. Maybe because of what you are referencing - it's exaustingt to try and "sell" yourself to a group of new people. Crap, I have trouble just standing at the bus stop with new people. So I kind of feel like there must be a reason for this happening. The money would have been good, yeah, but maybe I'm bound for something else. Besides, this week has been nice. I've just sat around in Golden Gate park feeding birds and drinking coffee. Tomorrow, I'm going down to work on some sculpture at my dad's studio. I know It'll probably scare people, but I'm becoming more positive and at peace as I grow older. Oh, and word sista, screw da mudda fuggin' fuzz, yo.