Fic: RPS (Jared/Jensen): In It for Love [15 / 17] | NC-17 | 6140 words
Title: In It for Love [ 15 / 17 ]
Author: dragonspell
Fandom: RPS
Pairing: Jared/Jensen (and Jared/a slew of other characters including Misha Collins, Tom Welling, Mike Rosenbaum, Danneel Harris, Sandy McCoy and some OMCs and OFCs)
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: AU. Cheesiness. Fandom cliches. The usual drill.
Summary (fic): After a drunken dare, award-winning writer Jensen agreed to on a reality television show to vie for the attention of megastar Jared Padalecki who he's had a crush on for years. Only Jensen doesn't know how he's going to be able to tolerate all the other contestants and their widely varying personalities and he's pretty sure that you're not supposed to be able to get used to somebody filming you 24/7.
Summary (part): Jared makes his choice.
Word Count: 6140
Disclaimer: Never happened, no affiliation.
Master Post: Master Post
A/N: Can't believe that I managed to get this far... I have no idea when I'll be able to get to the next part. ;_; Beta credit for this part to ilookthetype
Part 14 | Master Post | Part 16
Episode 8 - Second Half
Jensen woke to the feeling of the warmth of the sun on his face, soft and diffused through the half-pulled screen and the knowledge that he wasn’t alone. His lips curled into a small smile and he opened his eyes, expecting to see Jared grinning back at him. What he got was Sandy staring at him from the edge of the bed. Jensen sat upright, clutching the blankets around him more out of surprise than any sense of modesty. He didn’t know how, exactly, the blankets would save him from a possible attack but he felt better with them wrapped around him. “Jared’s gone,” Sandy said and Jensen blinked at her, not understanding.
“Gone?” he repeated stupidly because he couldn’t tell if she meant gone gone or gone as in ‘just stepped out for an hour or so.’
“Jeff’s supposed to take us to see him at noon,” she replied. “Today’s the last day.” Still staring, she curled her feet up underneath her. “I just can’t take this,” she whispered and unlike before Jensen knew exactly what she meant.
His stomach gave a sickening lurch at the small tendril of fear. Sandy was perfect for Jared. She was part of Jared’s world and knew the ins and outs of the Hollywood scene and she could boost Jared’s already soaring career higher. They’d be a power couple and then they could have tons of disgustingly beautiful babies. Jensen couldn’t offer any of that. All he had was a disturbingly fannish crush (and thanks to last night, Jared probably knew just how disturbing that crush was) and a willing attitude. It was disheartening because Jensen would like to think that he and Jared had formed a connection in the few weeks that they’d known each other but, Jesus, they’d only known each other for a few weeks. Jensen had had summer flings that lasted longer. He’d like to think that there was something special there but what if he was only fooling himself?
Jared had to know the stakes in this, really. Sure, it was probably nice to be able to fool around with people while you worked out which one you could see yourself being with-speed dating dialed up to eleven, that was reality dating shows-and what if Jensen was just one of those people that Jared thought he might like to sleep with but that he’d have a better chance with someone else? That Sandy would be a better fit for him?
Jensen would like to say that he’d chose differently but he honestly didn’t know. He couldn’t possibly look at the situation with bias, either. Sandy was a good person, he knew, but he still didn’t want her to win.
“It’s the waiting that really sucks,” Sandy continued, more to herself than anything. “You know, not knowing. It’s like being up for a role and knowing that the director has two clear favorites but you don’t know if he’s going to choose you or not. You want him to but you don’t know if the other person is better.” She turned her head to look at Jensen and Jensen snapped his mouth closed. Eerie to hear his own thoughts coming back at him.
“Yeah,” he said, nodding. “It’s just like that.”
Sandy smiled, quick and sudden and Jensen had to catch his breath because he’d always known that she was gorgeous but, sometimes, Sandy was just downright stunning. “Want to go for a swim?” she asked. “I didn’t want to go alone.”
Jensen nodded again. He’d love to.
Jensen knew that he was going to miss the ocean when he finally had to return to his real life. It was just so surreal to have his own strip of private beach right outside his backdoor to use whenever he liked. Back home, his place was nice and all, but it didn’t exactly have this kind of view.
It might be for the best, however, he thought. Because there was a distinct possibility that he was going to evolve into a fish if he stayed in the water much longer. It was as if he was trying to soak up his fill before he got shipped back to Texas.
Sandy and Jared seemed to share his love of the water but, for all Jensen knew, they did probably did vacations like this on a regular basis. This wasn’t new to them. So Sandy had an easier time coming in from the water to shower and dry off when Jeff called them and it was only the promise of getting to see Jared that made Jensen follow her.
Not that he could regret his choice. Jared was laying on a blanket beside them, evidently having chosen a picnic on the beach as the best way to spend lunch and his grin was making Jensen’s heart flutter in pathetic joy. He’d only just met this man and he’d fallen this hard. Jensen’s logical side was bemoaning his complete lack of sense but the rest of him just didn’t care.
“I heard that you were thinking of starting a new movie in a month,” Jared said, looking at Sandy even as he offered Jensen a piece of pineapple. Jensen took the fruit while Sandy hemmed and hawed.
“Well, maybe,” she said. “Possibly. McG really wants me to do it but I’m just not sure, you know?” Jared nodded and she continued. “I mean, it would take me to New Zealand for a year which would be amazing so I’m really thinking about it but…”
Jared raised his eyebrows. “But?”
Sandy shook her head. “Not here,” she whispered, glancing over at the cameras and Jared nodded like he understood. Which was good because Jensen was a little lost.
“Maybe on your next movie, I’ll have to tag along,” Jared joked lightly and Jensen felt his heart clench, just a little. “So you don’t get lonely.”
Sandy giggled. “I’d like that.”
“What about you, Jen?” Jensen head snapped back over to Jared. “You got your next big book all set?”
Jensen shrugged, glancing away. He couldn’t take Jared staring at him and not want to jump him and he had a feeling that Sandy wouldn’t be okay with that. “Publishing industry is different from the movies,” he said. “Unless it’s research, I just gotta meet deadlines and that’s it.” It might actually be refreshing to take a year to wander New Zealand. Jensen wondered what all he could learn, what ideas he could get.
“That’s cool,” Jared said. “So can you write from anywhere or you have a special place? I’ve never seen you write, Jen-but I wouldn’t know how you’d have time to, so…”
Jensen shook his head. He was happy to be talking about himself and yet not at the same time-not with all the cameras and Sandy still there. “I can write wherever, I just haven’t, uh, been in the right frame of mind, lately.” He smiled at Jared who grinned back.
“Fair enough.” Jared rolled up onto his knees and looked at them both. “So I just really wanted to thank the both of you for sticking with me for so long. I honestly care about both of you and I’ve got a hard decision to make now.”
The bottom of Jensen’s stomach dropped out-this was fucking it-and he saw Jeff out of the corner of his eye, watching the scene. Jensen felt an irrational surge of irritation for Jeff cutting off his time with Jared even though he knew that the moment couldn’t last forever-nor would he want it to. Yesterday maybe, but today he really just wanted it over with.
Jared leaned forward and gave Sandy a quick kiss. “Bye,” he murmured to her before turning and doing the same to Jensen. “See you in a little bit.” He pushed himself up and walked away, leaving both Sandy and Jensen staring after him like puppies. Jensen groaned at himself-he’d sworn that he’d never be that person and yet here he was, pining just because the man he was in love with was leaving him for a few hours.
Jeff clapped his hands. “We’re going to get some more footage of you two,” he said, “and then we’ll set up, alright?”
Jensen really wished that this was all said and done already. Just like Sandy, he was sick of the waiting.
It was harder than Jensen had thought that it would be, standing on the beach with Sandy beside him, waiting for Jared to make his ‘grand entrance.’ Jensen had never even considered the idea that he’d get this far, back when he’d just been contemplating going on the show. At best, he figured that he’d be able to meet Jared at a casting call, just like a dorky fanboy going to a convention and get to shake his hand or something. He never would have thought that it would have ever gotten this far. Or, if he had thought of it, he was pretty sure that he would have skipped this moment and gone straight into some hot sex on the beach.
Except for the fact that, as Jensen learned last night, sex on the beach wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. Funny how the movies just seemed to glance over how uncomfortable the sand could be. He and Jared had just ended up rolling around together before dissolving into giggles about just how ridiculous it was all turning out to be and had ended the night just heading for the house.
Still, Jensen though, it was worth if only to live out a stupid fantasy.
None of that, however, was helping him now. He glanced over at Sandy and her serene face, wondering just how she managed to project calm so damn easily. He knew that she was as twisted up inside as he was: Her hands fisted in the white fabric her designer dress were betraying her. She looked like a million dollars, all soft, perfect ringlets of hair framing her face and expertly applied make-up. How did he think that he even had a chance? Sandy caught him looking and gave him a quick smile, nudging him with her shoulder and Jensen nudged her back with complete understanding.
The waiting sucked. Jensen knew that technically, he had a 50/50 chance of Jared choosing him (he wouldn’t say winning because that made it all sound too much like a game and, for Jensen’s sanity, he severely hoped that this all wasn’t just a game). The technicality of his chances, however, was for shit because, at the moment, all he could think about was all the ways in which Sandy would be perfect for Jared and all the ways in which Jensen wouldn’t. Sandy was red carpet material; Jensen-if his performance at Chad’s premiere was anything to go by-really wasn’t. Sandy lived Jared’s lifestyle; Jensen preferred more peace and quiet. Sandy was outgoing and friendly and everyone’s best friend; Jensen…wasn’t. It wasn’t that he couldn’t be friendly-not at all-it was more that he just had to be comfortable with a person first and, in a world of strangers, that wasn’t exactly an option.
By the time that he finally spotted Jared striding down the beach towards where they were standing, Jensen had all but convinced himself that Jared was going to pick Sandy, trying to spare himself from disappointment. Except for one silly little piece of his heart which was insisting that Jared was going to pick him. Jensen smoothed his palms on his slacks and told himself that he was just going to calmly stand there and wait for Jared’s decision. Well. Unless he died first.
When Jared finally arrived, he spent a lot of time staring at the sand and as each second ticked by, Jensen felt his sense of dread ratcheting up higher. Jared was trying to find the best way to let someone down easy and he didn’t want it to be him. He really, really didn’t. Jensen hadn’t come all this way-come to Tahiti-to be sent back home. Then again, neither had Sandy.
“This is the last time that we’re going to be standing like this, isn’t it?” Jared said, breaking the silence and Jensen stopped breathing for half a second. “It really feels like it’s been forever since I’ve had a chance to meet you and it’s really hard to wrap my head around that it’s really been not much time at all. I feel like I’ve known both of you forever.” He glanced up, making eye contact with the both of them. “This has been one really wild ride, hasn’t it?”
Sandy nodded and Jensen followed her lead a few moments later, still stuck on worrying about his chances. “I’ve really appreciated the chance to get to know both of you because you both are such amazing wonderful people and, no matter who I choose here today, I just want you to know that I care for you both.” Jensen nodded again, wishing that Jared could just skip all of this and get to the point already. He wanted the sand to swallow him up whole or for a tidal wave to come and wash everything away-the cameras, Jeff standing over on the side, himself… But then he’d miss what Jared had to say and Jensen knew that he couldn’t live in the limbo that he’d been existing in for weeks now. He had to know.
“This wasn’t easy for me and I know that’s such a stupid thing to say but it wasn’t. Because you’re both amazing and I had to really think about who do I think would make the best relationship with me? Who do I think I have the best chance of making something work? Who do I think I’d possibly like to make a future with? That’s a big decision to make in the short amount of time that we’ve had, you know? Bigger than anything, right?
“And maybe I’m blowing this all out of proportion. Maybe I’m attaching this big cosmic significance to it that it doesn’t have to have but that’s just who I am and I’m hoping that the person I choose feels the same way.” Jensen’s heart gave a painful thump because, Jesus, yes. With just one little decision, Jared had the ability to possibly affect Jensen’s entire future. What would he do if Jared didn’t choose him? What would he do if Jared did? Either one, now that Jensen thought about it, was equally frightening. If Jared didn’t choose him, would Jensen just accept the rejection? Or would he be pathetically depressed, achieving a fannish depth which he’d never thought he’d ever fall to? And if Jared did choose him only to realize later that he’d made a mistake? Or what if Jared chose him and Jensen later realized that it’d been a mistake? He’d only known Jared for a little while-what if Jared was hiding parts of himself away?
Jensen tried to calm himself down, to breathe normally, but he knew that his world was narrowing down to Jared and just Jared, staring at his mouth and praying that Jared said what he needed to hear. What that was, though, Jensen still hadn’t decided. “Sandy,” Jared was saying, “I’m very happy that you decided to come on this show. I mean, you didn’t have to and it was actually a big risk to do it and I really want you to know how much I appreciate it. Because I got the chance to know the real you and not just the actress that I see up on the screen. I found out just who you are when you’re not acting and I found that that person is definitely someone that I could easily fall in love with. You’re so open and warm-you actually care about people and that’s such an amazing thing. I love how involved with charity work you are and how much it means to you. It’s a viewpoint that we definitely share.
“We actually share quite a lot-we’re very much alike and I like that. I like how effortless it feels being a part of the scene when you’re at my side-how easily you worked the crowds at the fashion show and how you just glowed. And you’re so incredibly talented to boot and beautiful, that I’m just blown away by the person that you are.” Screw the fashion show, Sandy was positively glowing now. She smiled happily and twirled her toe against the podium, putting on a show for Jared. “See?” Jared said. “You’d be absolutely perfect for me.”
“And Jen…” Jensen snapped his head upward to meet Jared’s eyes, expectant yet hesitant. He could do this, right? “It has been such an incredible experience getting to know you. You’re an amazing person, too, and you blow my mind. Every time I think that I know you, you let me see another layer and I realize that I could spend my entire life learning about you. And that I’d be so happy doing so. I love the sarcastic sense of humor that you have and how you feel comfortable sharing it with me and your ways of looking at the world are just such a breath of fresh air. Your little shy habits, too-like that!” Jared pointed at Jensen and Jensen finally became conscious of the fact that he was sucking his lower lip into his mouth while he tried to turn away. “God, that’s so hot. You drive me crazy, Jen. You’re also incredibly talented and beautiful and this has just been such a hard choice for me. Do I pick the person that is so incredibly like me and loves my lifestyle? Or do I pick the person that is my opposite but that complements me in every way?”
Jared paused there, drawing out the moment until Jensen thought that he was about to pass out and remembered to breathe. “Whichever one I choose,” Jared said quietly, “I want you both to know, too, that it doesn’t mean that I don’t still want to be friends with the other.” Jensen nodded hurriedly, hoping that Jared would get down to the bottom line sometime this century. “Well, I thought really hard on this and, y’all, I had to call my momma to get some advice, too.” As Jared grinned at that, Jensen risked a glance over at Sandy, daring to pry his eyes away from Jared’s face for half a moment, to see that the nerves were getting the better of her, too. Her face was tightening, hardening the smile lines.
“I talked it over with a lot of people and thought about it for a long time and I really do think that I’m making the right choice here. ‘Course, only time’s gonna tell that, right? Anyway. Sandy?” Jensen felt his heart plummet to the floor. No… No, no, no… Jared had to chose Jensen, right? Even after all the convincing and rationalizing that Jensen had done, Jared still had to know that he had to pick Jensen? His heart was beating so loudly in his chest that Jared’s next words sounded like a toneless drone. “Thank you so much for being here for me. Please don’t be mad, but I had to choose Jensen.”
Sandy doubled over, covering her face and it took Jensen a few moments of standing there stupidly before he realized that Jared was smiling at him. At him. At Jensen and not at Sandy who had moved to the edge of the small stage that they were standing on and Jared had chosen him.
Jared held his arms out to Jensen, his smile starting to waver. “Come on, Jen, don’t leave me hanging.” Jensen swayed, still unable to truly believe that Jared had picked him over everyone else in the entire house. “Please,” Jared added and then Jensen was moving. He didn’t care how desperate he looked doing it-he jumped off the stage and ran up to Jared, letting Jared pull him in for a kiss.
Jared had chosen him. Everybody else that Jensen had met on that first day, all those beautiful, gorgeous, talented people fawning at Jared’s feet and Jared had picked him out of everybody.
Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared’s neck, dragging him as close as Jensen could manage. He’d make sure that Jared never regretted it. Jared sighed happily and slipped his tongue inside Jensen’s mouth and Jensen didn’t even care that the cameras were still rolling. They could either enjoy the show or go fuck themselves. He was busy, damn it.
It was hard to believe that they were here. It was even harder to believe that it was all over and it was definitely past time for Jensen to ‘collect his winnings’ as Jeff as so termed it. As soon as Jared had announced his ‘winner’ and the resulting make-out session had been filmed from every angle possible, Jeff had loudly announced, “That’s a wrap!” Just like that, the cameramen had dropped their cameras and walked away and Jensen was left boggling at the fact that his days of being filmed 24/7 were over. Jeff started packing everyone up and, for the first time in weeks, Jensen didn’t feel a need to hide anything and he didn’t have to worry about any possible indiscretions possibly being broadcasted into his mother’s living room.
He’d practically stampeded for the new hotel room when Jared had suggested it.
Jared pushed Jensen onto the bed, standing up to stare. Sprawling on the bed, Jensen didn’t try to hide, letting Jared look his fill as he did the same because Jared was just that damned gorgeous. Jared groaned. “Damn, Jen. You seriously have no fucking clue…” Jensen didn’t get a chance to ask him a clue about what before Jared was on top of him and then Jensen figured that he had other things to worry about. Like the fact that Jared’s very interested dick was poking him in the stomach and Jensen was about to get up close and personal with it.
Jensen surged upwards, wrapping his arms around Jared’s neck and dragging him down for a kiss that was more rough passion than anything remotely resembling technique. He was a little too far gone for that because Jared was his.
Jared groaned again and pushed his tongue into Jensen’s mouth while his hands pulled at Jensen’s shirt like he was trying to rip it off. Jensen’s hips bucked-naked would be good, now that he thought about it-and he shoved Jared backwards just long enough to pull off his own shirt. “Fuck, Jen…” Jared said, ripping off his own and tossing it over his shoulder. Jensen licked his lips at the hard abs, his hand flattening over them and feeling every ridge and bump as Jared instinctively sucked in his stomach. Holy fucking Hell, Jensen thought, still disbelieving that he was really here. But those were definitely Jared’s big hands crawling up Jensen’s chest and that was definitely Jared coming down for another kiss.
Jensen met him readily, gripping at Jared’s shoulders to try and hold him still while Jared fumbled at Jensen’s belt. Right. Naked. Naked would still be good. Jensen kissed back distractedly while his hands joined Jared’s, lifting his hips up off the bed to push his pants down over his hips. He kicked them off, feet scraping against his legs in an effort to free himself while Jared moved over to one side of the bed to shove down his shorts and toss them to a corner of the room as well underwear and all. Jensen swallowed hard because this was the first time that he’d ever been so up close and personal with Jared’s cock in broad daylight and his mouth was going dry. Damn but Jared was big. Theoretically, Jensen had known that-his eyes were just reaffirming it for him.
Unable to resist the urge, Jensen sat up and pushed Jared over. “Getting rough are we?” Jared asked teasingly, even as his breath hitched on the last syllable. Jensen ignored him, reaching out to grab Jared’s dick and lowering his mouth to it. He’d be dreaming about this for a long time.
Jared whined, high-pitched and pained, and covered his eyes as Jensen’s mouth sealed around the head of his dick. There was a spurt of precome on Jensen’s tongue as Jared panted helpless, speechless for once. Jensen decided that it was a rather good look for him and tried to swallow more. He choked about halfway down and came back up to lap at the head instead.
“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck…” Jared whimpered and then the next thing Jensen knew, he was being flipped onto his back and Jared was pining him down and reaching for the nightstand drawer. “You and your fucking mouth, Jen,” Jared said. “Can’t fucking take it…” He stared down at Jensen. “I’m about ready to lose it and I’ve been looking forward to this for a little too long to do that.” He kissed Jensen, rough and fierce, as he pushed up Jensen left leg, spreading him.
Jensen moaned, throwing himself into Jared’s kiss while he desperately humped the air because yes, oh fuck yes-he was on the same damn page. Jared pushed two slick fingers inside of Jensen, wiggling them and Jensen started to pant. “Yeah…” he whispered, his voice breaking at the pleasure of having Jared pushing inside of him.
“Yeah?” Jared asked, fucking his fingers into Jensen to try and make him beg. “You like that?”
Fucking tease. Jensen twisted upward and grabbed Jared’s wrist, pulling his fingers out. “It’s good enough,” he said and slammed himself back down to the bed, wiggling eagerly. At this point, Jensen figured that they’d had more than enough foreplay-hell the entire freaking day had just been one long set-up, right?
“Good enough?” Jared’s slick fingers probed at Jensen again. “You sure?”
“Yes,” Jensen hissed, not even trying to keep the impatience out of his voice anymore. Jared needed to get on with this as in yesterday. Jensen was liable to die any day now waiting for Jared to just get inside him already. He didn’t want to think about what the coroner would have to put down for “reason for death.” He squirmed impatiently.
“Okay,” Jared said, nodding hurriedly. “Okay.” Then he was positioning himself and pushing slowly inside of Jensen and was just so damn perfect. Jensen bit his lip, focusing on the feeling of Jared sliding inside of him, slick from lube and the condom as he stretched him, and Jensen spread his legs wider to try and accommodate him. “Oh fuck, Jen,” Jared panted. “Jesus, you’re tight…” He paused, breathing deeply, possibly fighting for control but Jensen was all out of patience. He wrapped his legs around Jared’s waist, locking them, and pulled Jared as close as he could manage. Jared gasped, his hands grabbing at Jensen’s hips and his eyes going wide and he was the hottest thing that Jensen had seen in his entire life.
“Just do it,” Jensen ordered, though it was more of a whine than a demand. Jared nodded again, though, his hips already rocking gently against Jensen’s body and Jensen was seeing stars. He reached down, grabbing a hold of his dick and started to stroke because he knew that he wasn’t going to last very long at all.
Jared was babbling about him, something about Jensen and hot and other words that Jensen couldn’t make out but the growling, rasping tone which Jared used to say them made his stomach clench and his dick twitch. He ran his hands over Jared’s body, trying to encourage more of the wonderful syllables that were about to rock his world all by themselves.
Jensen stroked himself harder as Jared moved in as close as he could get, shouldering Jensen’s legs as he thrust and far too soon for Jensen’s liking, he was shuddering his way through an orgasm, his back arching as he came. Jared babbled words at him again, his hands stroking over Jensen’s face but Jensen was too concerned trying to hold his mind together to pay attention.
It wasn’t until he came back down, slumping against the bed as his muscles relaxed that he realized that Jared had sped up, that he was going for it too, muttering, “Jesus, so fucking hot, Jen, God I love it when you do that. So fucking tight…” Jared had let Jensen’s legs sprawl wherever they wanted and had plastered himself to Jensen, whispering the words into Jensen’s neck. The friction of Jared’s body against Jensen’s spent dick was making Jensen twitch in something that wasn’t quite pain-not yet-and Jared’s thrusts occasionally hit Jensen’s prostate, making his world reel each time, but Jensen still wrapped his arms around Jared’s shoulders, holding him tight. With one final surge, Jared came, groaning against Jensen’s neck as he pulsed inside of him.
Jensen held him, panting, feeling like he’d just run a marathon. Jared shook himself mumbling, “So good…” in between the few kisses that he pressed to Jensen’s skin. Jensen winced as Jared pulled out, sharply remembering that it had been awhile since he’d actually gotten this far-couple years actually-and that Jared was definitely big. “Did I hurt you?” Jared asked, concerned but still trying to catch his breath. Jensen turned his head to see Jared staring back at him, pushing his hair out of his eyes.
“No,” Jensen answered truthfully because he felt fucking fantastic. There was a slight ache but it was eclipsed by Cloud 9 and the feeling that he’d just won the lottery.
“You sure?” Jared asked and Jensen rolled his eyes and smacked him. “Hey!” Jared said, pretending to be offended. “I was just asking!” He leaned forward and planted a kiss on Jensen’s lips. Jensen smiled, returning it, and didn’t even notice the sneak attack until it was too late. While Jensen had been distracted, Jared’s hand had stealthily crept down between Jensen’s legs, probing at him. Jensen hissed. “Are you sure, Jen?” Jared asked and the look that he gave Jensen was better than any kicked puppy’s.
“I’m fine,” Jensen said, pushing Jared away. Just a little sore. “Maybe next time I’ll do you, though.”
Jared grinned and kissed Jensen again. “I’ll look forward to it,” he said. “We’ve got all week.”
“All week?” Jensen repeated and Jared nodded. An entire week with Jared by himself in Tahiti. That was probably akin, Jensen thought, to his own personal Heaven on Earth. “I must have been a damn monk in another life,” Jensen mumbled and this time it was him kissing Jared.
There was a niggling thought in the back of Jensen’s mind, wondering about what happened once the week was up, but he firmly shoved it away. No sense in ruining the damn moment. Or week.
Jared rolled easily when Jensen pushed him, laughing as he clutched at Jensen’s waist. This was going to be the best damn week of Jensen’s life.
Jensen had never quite realized just how intense it could be being at the center of Jared’s concentrated attention. Whereas before, Jared had always had other things to think about on the dates-other cast members, the show itself, cameras, what they were going to do next-but with the show wrapped up and nothing on the slate, Jared had focused everything onto Jensen. And it was heady.
Jared had apparently had one goal in mind all week and that was to keep Jensen tingling in a permanent haze and Jensen had to say that Jared had been very successful at that. Jared must have slipped Jensen some uppers or something because Jensen had yet to come down from the high that he’d been soaring on for the entire week. Jared had been constantly entertaining him, showing him the various places of the island, getting him sailing lessons, trying every piece of food that Jared could get his hands on and that was just when they managed to make it out of the hotel room. Jensen had found that, even with the gleaming possibilities of new experiences, he was perfectly fine with not bothering to get out of bed-not when Jared was right there with him. Tahiti had been Jensen’s own personal Eden, both inside and out and he couldn’t possibly think of anywhere he’d rather be.
Even Jeff showing up after his week long absence hadn’t been enough to break Jensen’s mood or to stop him from grinning like a loon. His face was starting to hurt and Jensen didn’t think that he’d smiled so much in his life. He couldn’t help it, though-just one look at Jared would instantly make his lips curve and prolonged exposure meant that he’d either be laughing or soaring high.
It wasn’t until Jeff had shoved Jensen out the door alone, letting Jensen get one last kiss in, before it finally sunk in just what was happening: It was past time to return to his normal life. Which was good, he supposed, because he missed his family and he missed Chris and he missed writing, but Jeff was talking oh so casually about contractual obligations and Jesus, had he really just said that Jensen wasn’t allowed to see Jared for three months? “Seriously?” Jensen asked. A woman bumped into him from behind and he tried to step forward, moving closer to Jeff in the busy airport. All around him were people arriving and leaving and a too-polite voice was chiming that Flight number 7 was boarding. The ticket that Jensen had checked in had a large 7 in the corner.
“Part of the contract, kiddo. No physical contact for the next three months while we get the show through production and air it.” Well, no wonder Jeff had nearly had to pry Jared off Jensen with a crowbar. Jared had known. “You’re allowed phone calls but only during set hours but otherwise the next time that you’ll see Jared will be at the live airing of the reunion episode and I expect that to happen. Clear?”
Jensen stared at Jeff and he could have kicked himself for the little “Why?” that popped out. Straight on back to being pathetic, apparently.
Jeff smiled tiredly. “Because, Jen, no one can know. Now, remember, you can’t tell anyone the outcome, we clear?” Jeff raised his eyebrows expectantly and Jensen hesitantly nodded. He didn’t have any other choice and he knew it. “Good. I’ll send you the tickets for the flight back to LA for the reunion. Until then,” Jeff grabbed Jensen’s hand, giving it a firm shake, “have a great three months.” He shoved Jensen toward the line of people that was slowly disappearing onto the plane and Jensen stumbled into the queue.
Theoretically, he’d known that this was going to happen. He’d known that this was going to happen right from the start. It was, though, just yet another one of those things that he’d never really thought through. Three months was more than double the amount of time that Jensen had spent getting to know Jared. Hell, it was more than triple.
It was ridiculous, but Jensen couldn’t ignore the little bit of worry he felt tugging at his heart. It had taken Jared all of a couple of weeks to choose him. Would it take Jared all of a couple of weeks to forget him again? It wasn’t as if those weeks were enough to form anything resembling a lasting bond. Well, not for a sane person, at any rate-stalkers and crazy people, sure. …Jensen didn’t want to think of what it made him that he was already hoping that the past few days that he’d spent with Jared were good enough to last.
Jared had chosen Jensen, yes, but… In a relationship that had only lasted less than a month, three months was a long time. It was a very long time.
Jensen sat down in his seat on the plane and stared out the window as other passengers continued to board. He was heading back to real life, kicked out of the metaphorical Garden, and, after a few weeks of living with Jared, Jensen didn't think he wanted to remember what life without Jared was like. That was a scary thought. He’d been just fine without Jared before, after all. And yet, in a few short weeks, that had all changed and Jensen couldn’t exactly point to when.
All he knew was that three months was going to be a long damn time and wasn’t it funny just how easily perceptions could be changed.
Part 14 | Master Post | Part 16
Author: dragonspell
Fandom: RPS
Pairing: Jared/Jensen (and Jared/a slew of other characters including Misha Collins, Tom Welling, Mike Rosenbaum, Danneel Harris, Sandy McCoy and some OMCs and OFCs)
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: AU. Cheesiness. Fandom cliches. The usual drill.
Summary (fic): After a drunken dare, award-winning writer Jensen agreed to on a reality television show to vie for the attention of megastar Jared Padalecki who he's had a crush on for years. Only Jensen doesn't know how he's going to be able to tolerate all the other contestants and their widely varying personalities and he's pretty sure that you're not supposed to be able to get used to somebody filming you 24/7.
Summary (part): Jared makes his choice.
Word Count: 6140
Disclaimer: Never happened, no affiliation.
Master Post: Master Post
A/N: Can't believe that I managed to get this far... I have no idea when I'll be able to get to the next part. ;_; Beta credit for this part to ilookthetype
Part 14 | Master Post | Part 16
Episode 8 - Second Half
Jensen woke to the feeling of the warmth of the sun on his face, soft and diffused through the half-pulled screen and the knowledge that he wasn’t alone. His lips curled into a small smile and he opened his eyes, expecting to see Jared grinning back at him. What he got was Sandy staring at him from the edge of the bed. Jensen sat upright, clutching the blankets around him more out of surprise than any sense of modesty. He didn’t know how, exactly, the blankets would save him from a possible attack but he felt better with them wrapped around him. “Jared’s gone,” Sandy said and Jensen blinked at her, not understanding.
“Gone?” he repeated stupidly because he couldn’t tell if she meant gone gone or gone as in ‘just stepped out for an hour or so.’
“Jeff’s supposed to take us to see him at noon,” she replied. “Today’s the last day.” Still staring, she curled her feet up underneath her. “I just can’t take this,” she whispered and unlike before Jensen knew exactly what she meant.
His stomach gave a sickening lurch at the small tendril of fear. Sandy was perfect for Jared. She was part of Jared’s world and knew the ins and outs of the Hollywood scene and she could boost Jared’s already soaring career higher. They’d be a power couple and then they could have tons of disgustingly beautiful babies. Jensen couldn’t offer any of that. All he had was a disturbingly fannish crush (and thanks to last night, Jared probably knew just how disturbing that crush was) and a willing attitude. It was disheartening because Jensen would like to think that he and Jared had formed a connection in the few weeks that they’d known each other but, Jesus, they’d only known each other for a few weeks. Jensen had had summer flings that lasted longer. He’d like to think that there was something special there but what if he was only fooling himself?
Jared had to know the stakes in this, really. Sure, it was probably nice to be able to fool around with people while you worked out which one you could see yourself being with-speed dating dialed up to eleven, that was reality dating shows-and what if Jensen was just one of those people that Jared thought he might like to sleep with but that he’d have a better chance with someone else? That Sandy would be a better fit for him?
Jensen would like to say that he’d chose differently but he honestly didn’t know. He couldn’t possibly look at the situation with bias, either. Sandy was a good person, he knew, but he still didn’t want her to win.
“It’s the waiting that really sucks,” Sandy continued, more to herself than anything. “You know, not knowing. It’s like being up for a role and knowing that the director has two clear favorites but you don’t know if he’s going to choose you or not. You want him to but you don’t know if the other person is better.” She turned her head to look at Jensen and Jensen snapped his mouth closed. Eerie to hear his own thoughts coming back at him.
“Yeah,” he said, nodding. “It’s just like that.”
Sandy smiled, quick and sudden and Jensen had to catch his breath because he’d always known that she was gorgeous but, sometimes, Sandy was just downright stunning. “Want to go for a swim?” she asked. “I didn’t want to go alone.”
Jensen nodded again. He’d love to.
Jensen knew that he was going to miss the ocean when he finally had to return to his real life. It was just so surreal to have his own strip of private beach right outside his backdoor to use whenever he liked. Back home, his place was nice and all, but it didn’t exactly have this kind of view.
It might be for the best, however, he thought. Because there was a distinct possibility that he was going to evolve into a fish if he stayed in the water much longer. It was as if he was trying to soak up his fill before he got shipped back to Texas.
Sandy and Jared seemed to share his love of the water but, for all Jensen knew, they did probably did vacations like this on a regular basis. This wasn’t new to them. So Sandy had an easier time coming in from the water to shower and dry off when Jeff called them and it was only the promise of getting to see Jared that made Jensen follow her.
Not that he could regret his choice. Jared was laying on a blanket beside them, evidently having chosen a picnic on the beach as the best way to spend lunch and his grin was making Jensen’s heart flutter in pathetic joy. He’d only just met this man and he’d fallen this hard. Jensen’s logical side was bemoaning his complete lack of sense but the rest of him just didn’t care.
“I heard that you were thinking of starting a new movie in a month,” Jared said, looking at Sandy even as he offered Jensen a piece of pineapple. Jensen took the fruit while Sandy hemmed and hawed.
“Well, maybe,” she said. “Possibly. McG really wants me to do it but I’m just not sure, you know?” Jared nodded and she continued. “I mean, it would take me to New Zealand for a year which would be amazing so I’m really thinking about it but…”
Jared raised his eyebrows. “But?”
Sandy shook her head. “Not here,” she whispered, glancing over at the cameras and Jared nodded like he understood. Which was good because Jensen was a little lost.
“Maybe on your next movie, I’ll have to tag along,” Jared joked lightly and Jensen felt his heart clench, just a little. “So you don’t get lonely.”
Sandy giggled. “I’d like that.”
“What about you, Jen?” Jensen head snapped back over to Jared. “You got your next big book all set?”
Jensen shrugged, glancing away. He couldn’t take Jared staring at him and not want to jump him and he had a feeling that Sandy wouldn’t be okay with that. “Publishing industry is different from the movies,” he said. “Unless it’s research, I just gotta meet deadlines and that’s it.” It might actually be refreshing to take a year to wander New Zealand. Jensen wondered what all he could learn, what ideas he could get.
“That’s cool,” Jared said. “So can you write from anywhere or you have a special place? I’ve never seen you write, Jen-but I wouldn’t know how you’d have time to, so…”
Jensen shook his head. He was happy to be talking about himself and yet not at the same time-not with all the cameras and Sandy still there. “I can write wherever, I just haven’t, uh, been in the right frame of mind, lately.” He smiled at Jared who grinned back.
“Fair enough.” Jared rolled up onto his knees and looked at them both. “So I just really wanted to thank the both of you for sticking with me for so long. I honestly care about both of you and I’ve got a hard decision to make now.”
The bottom of Jensen’s stomach dropped out-this was fucking it-and he saw Jeff out of the corner of his eye, watching the scene. Jensen felt an irrational surge of irritation for Jeff cutting off his time with Jared even though he knew that the moment couldn’t last forever-nor would he want it to. Yesterday maybe, but today he really just wanted it over with.
Jared leaned forward and gave Sandy a quick kiss. “Bye,” he murmured to her before turning and doing the same to Jensen. “See you in a little bit.” He pushed himself up and walked away, leaving both Sandy and Jensen staring after him like puppies. Jensen groaned at himself-he’d sworn that he’d never be that person and yet here he was, pining just because the man he was in love with was leaving him for a few hours.
Jeff clapped his hands. “We’re going to get some more footage of you two,” he said, “and then we’ll set up, alright?”
Jensen really wished that this was all said and done already. Just like Sandy, he was sick of the waiting.
It was harder than Jensen had thought that it would be, standing on the beach with Sandy beside him, waiting for Jared to make his ‘grand entrance.’ Jensen had never even considered the idea that he’d get this far, back when he’d just been contemplating going on the show. At best, he figured that he’d be able to meet Jared at a casting call, just like a dorky fanboy going to a convention and get to shake his hand or something. He never would have thought that it would have ever gotten this far. Or, if he had thought of it, he was pretty sure that he would have skipped this moment and gone straight into some hot sex on the beach.
Except for the fact that, as Jensen learned last night, sex on the beach wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. Funny how the movies just seemed to glance over how uncomfortable the sand could be. He and Jared had just ended up rolling around together before dissolving into giggles about just how ridiculous it was all turning out to be and had ended the night just heading for the house.
Still, Jensen though, it was worth if only to live out a stupid fantasy.
None of that, however, was helping him now. He glanced over at Sandy and her serene face, wondering just how she managed to project calm so damn easily. He knew that she was as twisted up inside as he was: Her hands fisted in the white fabric her designer dress were betraying her. She looked like a million dollars, all soft, perfect ringlets of hair framing her face and expertly applied make-up. How did he think that he even had a chance? Sandy caught him looking and gave him a quick smile, nudging him with her shoulder and Jensen nudged her back with complete understanding.
The waiting sucked. Jensen knew that technically, he had a 50/50 chance of Jared choosing him (he wouldn’t say winning because that made it all sound too much like a game and, for Jensen’s sanity, he severely hoped that this all wasn’t just a game). The technicality of his chances, however, was for shit because, at the moment, all he could think about was all the ways in which Sandy would be perfect for Jared and all the ways in which Jensen wouldn’t. Sandy was red carpet material; Jensen-if his performance at Chad’s premiere was anything to go by-really wasn’t. Sandy lived Jared’s lifestyle; Jensen preferred more peace and quiet. Sandy was outgoing and friendly and everyone’s best friend; Jensen…wasn’t. It wasn’t that he couldn’t be friendly-not at all-it was more that he just had to be comfortable with a person first and, in a world of strangers, that wasn’t exactly an option.
By the time that he finally spotted Jared striding down the beach towards where they were standing, Jensen had all but convinced himself that Jared was going to pick Sandy, trying to spare himself from disappointment. Except for one silly little piece of his heart which was insisting that Jared was going to pick him. Jensen smoothed his palms on his slacks and told himself that he was just going to calmly stand there and wait for Jared’s decision. Well. Unless he died first.
When Jared finally arrived, he spent a lot of time staring at the sand and as each second ticked by, Jensen felt his sense of dread ratcheting up higher. Jared was trying to find the best way to let someone down easy and he didn’t want it to be him. He really, really didn’t. Jensen hadn’t come all this way-come to Tahiti-to be sent back home. Then again, neither had Sandy.
“This is the last time that we’re going to be standing like this, isn’t it?” Jared said, breaking the silence and Jensen stopped breathing for half a second. “It really feels like it’s been forever since I’ve had a chance to meet you and it’s really hard to wrap my head around that it’s really been not much time at all. I feel like I’ve known both of you forever.” He glanced up, making eye contact with the both of them. “This has been one really wild ride, hasn’t it?”
Sandy nodded and Jensen followed her lead a few moments later, still stuck on worrying about his chances. “I’ve really appreciated the chance to get to know both of you because you both are such amazing wonderful people and, no matter who I choose here today, I just want you to know that I care for you both.” Jensen nodded again, wishing that Jared could just skip all of this and get to the point already. He wanted the sand to swallow him up whole or for a tidal wave to come and wash everything away-the cameras, Jeff standing over on the side, himself… But then he’d miss what Jared had to say and Jensen knew that he couldn’t live in the limbo that he’d been existing in for weeks now. He had to know.
“This wasn’t easy for me and I know that’s such a stupid thing to say but it wasn’t. Because you’re both amazing and I had to really think about who do I think would make the best relationship with me? Who do I think I have the best chance of making something work? Who do I think I’d possibly like to make a future with? That’s a big decision to make in the short amount of time that we’ve had, you know? Bigger than anything, right?
“And maybe I’m blowing this all out of proportion. Maybe I’m attaching this big cosmic significance to it that it doesn’t have to have but that’s just who I am and I’m hoping that the person I choose feels the same way.” Jensen’s heart gave a painful thump because, Jesus, yes. With just one little decision, Jared had the ability to possibly affect Jensen’s entire future. What would he do if Jared didn’t choose him? What would he do if Jared did? Either one, now that Jensen thought about it, was equally frightening. If Jared didn’t choose him, would Jensen just accept the rejection? Or would he be pathetically depressed, achieving a fannish depth which he’d never thought he’d ever fall to? And if Jared did choose him only to realize later that he’d made a mistake? Or what if Jared chose him and Jensen later realized that it’d been a mistake? He’d only known Jared for a little while-what if Jared was hiding parts of himself away?
Jensen tried to calm himself down, to breathe normally, but he knew that his world was narrowing down to Jared and just Jared, staring at his mouth and praying that Jared said what he needed to hear. What that was, though, Jensen still hadn’t decided. “Sandy,” Jared was saying, “I’m very happy that you decided to come on this show. I mean, you didn’t have to and it was actually a big risk to do it and I really want you to know how much I appreciate it. Because I got the chance to know the real you and not just the actress that I see up on the screen. I found out just who you are when you’re not acting and I found that that person is definitely someone that I could easily fall in love with. You’re so open and warm-you actually care about people and that’s such an amazing thing. I love how involved with charity work you are and how much it means to you. It’s a viewpoint that we definitely share.
“We actually share quite a lot-we’re very much alike and I like that. I like how effortless it feels being a part of the scene when you’re at my side-how easily you worked the crowds at the fashion show and how you just glowed. And you’re so incredibly talented to boot and beautiful, that I’m just blown away by the person that you are.” Screw the fashion show, Sandy was positively glowing now. She smiled happily and twirled her toe against the podium, putting on a show for Jared. “See?” Jared said. “You’d be absolutely perfect for me.”
“And Jen…” Jensen snapped his head upward to meet Jared’s eyes, expectant yet hesitant. He could do this, right? “It has been such an incredible experience getting to know you. You’re an amazing person, too, and you blow my mind. Every time I think that I know you, you let me see another layer and I realize that I could spend my entire life learning about you. And that I’d be so happy doing so. I love the sarcastic sense of humor that you have and how you feel comfortable sharing it with me and your ways of looking at the world are just such a breath of fresh air. Your little shy habits, too-like that!” Jared pointed at Jensen and Jensen finally became conscious of the fact that he was sucking his lower lip into his mouth while he tried to turn away. “God, that’s so hot. You drive me crazy, Jen. You’re also incredibly talented and beautiful and this has just been such a hard choice for me. Do I pick the person that is so incredibly like me and loves my lifestyle? Or do I pick the person that is my opposite but that complements me in every way?”
Jared paused there, drawing out the moment until Jensen thought that he was about to pass out and remembered to breathe. “Whichever one I choose,” Jared said quietly, “I want you both to know, too, that it doesn’t mean that I don’t still want to be friends with the other.” Jensen nodded hurriedly, hoping that Jared would get down to the bottom line sometime this century. “Well, I thought really hard on this and, y’all, I had to call my momma to get some advice, too.” As Jared grinned at that, Jensen risked a glance over at Sandy, daring to pry his eyes away from Jared’s face for half a moment, to see that the nerves were getting the better of her, too. Her face was tightening, hardening the smile lines.
“I talked it over with a lot of people and thought about it for a long time and I really do think that I’m making the right choice here. ‘Course, only time’s gonna tell that, right? Anyway. Sandy?” Jensen felt his heart plummet to the floor. No… No, no, no… Jared had to chose Jensen, right? Even after all the convincing and rationalizing that Jensen had done, Jared still had to know that he had to pick Jensen? His heart was beating so loudly in his chest that Jared’s next words sounded like a toneless drone. “Thank you so much for being here for me. Please don’t be mad, but I had to choose Jensen.”
Sandy doubled over, covering her face and it took Jensen a few moments of standing there stupidly before he realized that Jared was smiling at him. At him. At Jensen and not at Sandy who had moved to the edge of the small stage that they were standing on and Jared had chosen him.
Jared held his arms out to Jensen, his smile starting to waver. “Come on, Jen, don’t leave me hanging.” Jensen swayed, still unable to truly believe that Jared had picked him over everyone else in the entire house. “Please,” Jared added and then Jensen was moving. He didn’t care how desperate he looked doing it-he jumped off the stage and ran up to Jared, letting Jared pull him in for a kiss.
Jared had chosen him. Everybody else that Jensen had met on that first day, all those beautiful, gorgeous, talented people fawning at Jared’s feet and Jared had picked him out of everybody.
Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared’s neck, dragging him as close as Jensen could manage. He’d make sure that Jared never regretted it. Jared sighed happily and slipped his tongue inside Jensen’s mouth and Jensen didn’t even care that the cameras were still rolling. They could either enjoy the show or go fuck themselves. He was busy, damn it.
It was hard to believe that they were here. It was even harder to believe that it was all over and it was definitely past time for Jensen to ‘collect his winnings’ as Jeff as so termed it. As soon as Jared had announced his ‘winner’ and the resulting make-out session had been filmed from every angle possible, Jeff had loudly announced, “That’s a wrap!” Just like that, the cameramen had dropped their cameras and walked away and Jensen was left boggling at the fact that his days of being filmed 24/7 were over. Jeff started packing everyone up and, for the first time in weeks, Jensen didn’t feel a need to hide anything and he didn’t have to worry about any possible indiscretions possibly being broadcasted into his mother’s living room.
He’d practically stampeded for the new hotel room when Jared had suggested it.
Jared pushed Jensen onto the bed, standing up to stare. Sprawling on the bed, Jensen didn’t try to hide, letting Jared look his fill as he did the same because Jared was just that damned gorgeous. Jared groaned. “Damn, Jen. You seriously have no fucking clue…” Jensen didn’t get a chance to ask him a clue about what before Jared was on top of him and then Jensen figured that he had other things to worry about. Like the fact that Jared’s very interested dick was poking him in the stomach and Jensen was about to get up close and personal with it.
Jensen surged upwards, wrapping his arms around Jared’s neck and dragging him down for a kiss that was more rough passion than anything remotely resembling technique. He was a little too far gone for that because Jared was his.
Jared groaned again and pushed his tongue into Jensen’s mouth while his hands pulled at Jensen’s shirt like he was trying to rip it off. Jensen’s hips bucked-naked would be good, now that he thought about it-and he shoved Jared backwards just long enough to pull off his own shirt. “Fuck, Jen…” Jared said, ripping off his own and tossing it over his shoulder. Jensen licked his lips at the hard abs, his hand flattening over them and feeling every ridge and bump as Jared instinctively sucked in his stomach. Holy fucking Hell, Jensen thought, still disbelieving that he was really here. But those were definitely Jared’s big hands crawling up Jensen’s chest and that was definitely Jared coming down for another kiss.
Jensen met him readily, gripping at Jared’s shoulders to try and hold him still while Jared fumbled at Jensen’s belt. Right. Naked. Naked would still be good. Jensen kissed back distractedly while his hands joined Jared’s, lifting his hips up off the bed to push his pants down over his hips. He kicked them off, feet scraping against his legs in an effort to free himself while Jared moved over to one side of the bed to shove down his shorts and toss them to a corner of the room as well underwear and all. Jensen swallowed hard because this was the first time that he’d ever been so up close and personal with Jared’s cock in broad daylight and his mouth was going dry. Damn but Jared was big. Theoretically, Jensen had known that-his eyes were just reaffirming it for him.
Unable to resist the urge, Jensen sat up and pushed Jared over. “Getting rough are we?” Jared asked teasingly, even as his breath hitched on the last syllable. Jensen ignored him, reaching out to grab Jared’s dick and lowering his mouth to it. He’d be dreaming about this for a long time.
Jared whined, high-pitched and pained, and covered his eyes as Jensen’s mouth sealed around the head of his dick. There was a spurt of precome on Jensen’s tongue as Jared panted helpless, speechless for once. Jensen decided that it was a rather good look for him and tried to swallow more. He choked about halfway down and came back up to lap at the head instead.
“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck…” Jared whimpered and then the next thing Jensen knew, he was being flipped onto his back and Jared was pining him down and reaching for the nightstand drawer. “You and your fucking mouth, Jen,” Jared said. “Can’t fucking take it…” He stared down at Jensen. “I’m about ready to lose it and I’ve been looking forward to this for a little too long to do that.” He kissed Jensen, rough and fierce, as he pushed up Jensen left leg, spreading him.
Jensen moaned, throwing himself into Jared’s kiss while he desperately humped the air because yes, oh fuck yes-he was on the same damn page. Jared pushed two slick fingers inside of Jensen, wiggling them and Jensen started to pant. “Yeah…” he whispered, his voice breaking at the pleasure of having Jared pushing inside of him.
“Yeah?” Jared asked, fucking his fingers into Jensen to try and make him beg. “You like that?”
Fucking tease. Jensen twisted upward and grabbed Jared’s wrist, pulling his fingers out. “It’s good enough,” he said and slammed himself back down to the bed, wiggling eagerly. At this point, Jensen figured that they’d had more than enough foreplay-hell the entire freaking day had just been one long set-up, right?
“Good enough?” Jared’s slick fingers probed at Jensen again. “You sure?”
“Yes,” Jensen hissed, not even trying to keep the impatience out of his voice anymore. Jared needed to get on with this as in yesterday. Jensen was liable to die any day now waiting for Jared to just get inside him already. He didn’t want to think about what the coroner would have to put down for “reason for death.” He squirmed impatiently.
“Okay,” Jared said, nodding hurriedly. “Okay.” Then he was positioning himself and pushing slowly inside of Jensen and was just so damn perfect. Jensen bit his lip, focusing on the feeling of Jared sliding inside of him, slick from lube and the condom as he stretched him, and Jensen spread his legs wider to try and accommodate him. “Oh fuck, Jen,” Jared panted. “Jesus, you’re tight…” He paused, breathing deeply, possibly fighting for control but Jensen was all out of patience. He wrapped his legs around Jared’s waist, locking them, and pulled Jared as close as he could manage. Jared gasped, his hands grabbing at Jensen’s hips and his eyes going wide and he was the hottest thing that Jensen had seen in his entire life.
“Just do it,” Jensen ordered, though it was more of a whine than a demand. Jared nodded again, though, his hips already rocking gently against Jensen’s body and Jensen was seeing stars. He reached down, grabbing a hold of his dick and started to stroke because he knew that he wasn’t going to last very long at all.
Jared was babbling about him, something about Jensen and hot and other words that Jensen couldn’t make out but the growling, rasping tone which Jared used to say them made his stomach clench and his dick twitch. He ran his hands over Jared’s body, trying to encourage more of the wonderful syllables that were about to rock his world all by themselves.
Jensen stroked himself harder as Jared moved in as close as he could get, shouldering Jensen’s legs as he thrust and far too soon for Jensen’s liking, he was shuddering his way through an orgasm, his back arching as he came. Jared babbled words at him again, his hands stroking over Jensen’s face but Jensen was too concerned trying to hold his mind together to pay attention.
It wasn’t until he came back down, slumping against the bed as his muscles relaxed that he realized that Jared had sped up, that he was going for it too, muttering, “Jesus, so fucking hot, Jen, God I love it when you do that. So fucking tight…” Jared had let Jensen’s legs sprawl wherever they wanted and had plastered himself to Jensen, whispering the words into Jensen’s neck. The friction of Jared’s body against Jensen’s spent dick was making Jensen twitch in something that wasn’t quite pain-not yet-and Jared’s thrusts occasionally hit Jensen’s prostate, making his world reel each time, but Jensen still wrapped his arms around Jared’s shoulders, holding him tight. With one final surge, Jared came, groaning against Jensen’s neck as he pulsed inside of him.
Jensen held him, panting, feeling like he’d just run a marathon. Jared shook himself mumbling, “So good…” in between the few kisses that he pressed to Jensen’s skin. Jensen winced as Jared pulled out, sharply remembering that it had been awhile since he’d actually gotten this far-couple years actually-and that Jared was definitely big. “Did I hurt you?” Jared asked, concerned but still trying to catch his breath. Jensen turned his head to see Jared staring back at him, pushing his hair out of his eyes.
“No,” Jensen answered truthfully because he felt fucking fantastic. There was a slight ache but it was eclipsed by Cloud 9 and the feeling that he’d just won the lottery.
“You sure?” Jared asked and Jensen rolled his eyes and smacked him. “Hey!” Jared said, pretending to be offended. “I was just asking!” He leaned forward and planted a kiss on Jensen’s lips. Jensen smiled, returning it, and didn’t even notice the sneak attack until it was too late. While Jensen had been distracted, Jared’s hand had stealthily crept down between Jensen’s legs, probing at him. Jensen hissed. “Are you sure, Jen?” Jared asked and the look that he gave Jensen was better than any kicked puppy’s.
“I’m fine,” Jensen said, pushing Jared away. Just a little sore. “Maybe next time I’ll do you, though.”
Jared grinned and kissed Jensen again. “I’ll look forward to it,” he said. “We’ve got all week.”
“All week?” Jensen repeated and Jared nodded. An entire week with Jared by himself in Tahiti. That was probably akin, Jensen thought, to his own personal Heaven on Earth. “I must have been a damn monk in another life,” Jensen mumbled and this time it was him kissing Jared.
There was a niggling thought in the back of Jensen’s mind, wondering about what happened once the week was up, but he firmly shoved it away. No sense in ruining the damn moment. Or week.
Jared rolled easily when Jensen pushed him, laughing as he clutched at Jensen’s waist. This was going to be the best damn week of Jensen’s life.
Jensen had never quite realized just how intense it could be being at the center of Jared’s concentrated attention. Whereas before, Jared had always had other things to think about on the dates-other cast members, the show itself, cameras, what they were going to do next-but with the show wrapped up and nothing on the slate, Jared had focused everything onto Jensen. And it was heady.
Jared had apparently had one goal in mind all week and that was to keep Jensen tingling in a permanent haze and Jensen had to say that Jared had been very successful at that. Jared must have slipped Jensen some uppers or something because Jensen had yet to come down from the high that he’d been soaring on for the entire week. Jared had been constantly entertaining him, showing him the various places of the island, getting him sailing lessons, trying every piece of food that Jared could get his hands on and that was just when they managed to make it out of the hotel room. Jensen had found that, even with the gleaming possibilities of new experiences, he was perfectly fine with not bothering to get out of bed-not when Jared was right there with him. Tahiti had been Jensen’s own personal Eden, both inside and out and he couldn’t possibly think of anywhere he’d rather be.
Even Jeff showing up after his week long absence hadn’t been enough to break Jensen’s mood or to stop him from grinning like a loon. His face was starting to hurt and Jensen didn’t think that he’d smiled so much in his life. He couldn’t help it, though-just one look at Jared would instantly make his lips curve and prolonged exposure meant that he’d either be laughing or soaring high.
It wasn’t until Jeff had shoved Jensen out the door alone, letting Jensen get one last kiss in, before it finally sunk in just what was happening: It was past time to return to his normal life. Which was good, he supposed, because he missed his family and he missed Chris and he missed writing, but Jeff was talking oh so casually about contractual obligations and Jesus, had he really just said that Jensen wasn’t allowed to see Jared for three months? “Seriously?” Jensen asked. A woman bumped into him from behind and he tried to step forward, moving closer to Jeff in the busy airport. All around him were people arriving and leaving and a too-polite voice was chiming that Flight number 7 was boarding. The ticket that Jensen had checked in had a large 7 in the corner.
“Part of the contract, kiddo. No physical contact for the next three months while we get the show through production and air it.” Well, no wonder Jeff had nearly had to pry Jared off Jensen with a crowbar. Jared had known. “You’re allowed phone calls but only during set hours but otherwise the next time that you’ll see Jared will be at the live airing of the reunion episode and I expect that to happen. Clear?”
Jensen stared at Jeff and he could have kicked himself for the little “Why?” that popped out. Straight on back to being pathetic, apparently.
Jeff smiled tiredly. “Because, Jen, no one can know. Now, remember, you can’t tell anyone the outcome, we clear?” Jeff raised his eyebrows expectantly and Jensen hesitantly nodded. He didn’t have any other choice and he knew it. “Good. I’ll send you the tickets for the flight back to LA for the reunion. Until then,” Jeff grabbed Jensen’s hand, giving it a firm shake, “have a great three months.” He shoved Jensen toward the line of people that was slowly disappearing onto the plane and Jensen stumbled into the queue.
Theoretically, he’d known that this was going to happen. He’d known that this was going to happen right from the start. It was, though, just yet another one of those things that he’d never really thought through. Three months was more than double the amount of time that Jensen had spent getting to know Jared. Hell, it was more than triple.
It was ridiculous, but Jensen couldn’t ignore the little bit of worry he felt tugging at his heart. It had taken Jared all of a couple of weeks to choose him. Would it take Jared all of a couple of weeks to forget him again? It wasn’t as if those weeks were enough to form anything resembling a lasting bond. Well, not for a sane person, at any rate-stalkers and crazy people, sure. …Jensen didn’t want to think of what it made him that he was already hoping that the past few days that he’d spent with Jared were good enough to last.
Jared had chosen Jensen, yes, but… In a relationship that had only lasted less than a month, three months was a long time. It was a very long time.
Jensen sat down in his seat on the plane and stared out the window as other passengers continued to board. He was heading back to real life, kicked out of the metaphorical Garden, and, after a few weeks of living with Jared, Jensen didn't think he wanted to remember what life without Jared was like. That was a scary thought. He’d been just fine without Jared before, after all. And yet, in a few short weeks, that had all changed and Jensen couldn’t exactly point to when.
All he knew was that three months was going to be a long damn time and wasn’t it funny just how easily perceptions could be changed.
Part 14 | Master Post | Part 16