These were the best words I could use to describe the feeling inside ( Read more... )

My life is in your hands. I'd like to think it always was but you give it to me and I don't know what to do with it. I try to quiet my mind but it works so little of the time. I am afraid of all decisions and all outcomes except a miracle. I need a miracle. I am here alone for good reason, not good enough reason but through my own faults, through ( Read more... )

Here's how I'm rationalizing it to myself ( Read more... )

I can say that somewhere can't I? It all seems so calculated and yet I can't seem to make the calculations make sense. I don't in fact know that I have ever been this confused...ever in my life...by a person. I suppose you go back and forth. I suppose I know lots of reasons why. I also suppose I just want to look at things from my own perspective ( Read more... )

How do you always end up here and always end up making it worse every year you try to put things right the left turn is proportional distortional no wonder that she didn't want to say and seeing it had to turn away but I rest on the words it isn't my time...sometimes I really think I was better off at home

Let's face it we're not honest and I don't know why we should be so I continue to lie. And it keeps reaching for me. You look back on years you weren't there at the life you didn't choose and sometimes you realize what you'll lose...what you lost...the time that won't come back...and I...I am not your whipping boy...waiting at the airport on ( Read more... )

The truth? The bitter truth is that this legitamacy is too much for me to give up for a life of uncertainty that I have lived before. The truth is in the words you use.

I want to hold you in the space that remains when the image shifts from it's frame. I love you each time that I shiver with shame. The truth hurts so I don't often admit it but eventually we all reach our limit i survived this one but what about 40,000 other minutes

I feel so awful right now that if I didn't know myselfnid be worried. :(

But this was difficult to make the severance complete, how much can change in just a few weeks. I know they see through my loose sort of story to the truth. But there is no proof of the things I didn't say and didn't do even if I wanted to. Even if I almost did I didn't "and life barrels on like a runaway train Where the passengers change They don' ( Read more... )