LADIES and GENTLEMEN!!
FOR ONE TIME ONLY,
FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT,
I BRING TO YOU:

THE
INCREDIBLE,
MIRACULOUS,
MAVELOUS,
UNCANNY,
SHRINKING
FONT!!!!!!!

huzzah!

"it's friday night. and i feel all right.
party's here on the west side.
so i reach for my 40 and i turn it up.
designated driver takes the keys to my truck"

i'm sitting in front of my computer on a fine friday night, typing out how i'm sitting in front of my latop on a fine friday night.

damn, that is a real kind of pitiful.

"you ever just... not want to be here?"

"what do you mean? at red lobster?"

"no. no. i mean--"

"good. 'cause these fucking cheddar biscuits are DE-FUCKING-LICIOUS. are you gonna eat that?"

"no-- here. i'm talking about here. shit. i dunno. sometimes you feel like the world fucking hates you. you know what i mean?"

"nope. i have no clue what you're ( Read more... )

Happy Peanuts Soar, 
Over Chocolate Covered Mountaintops 
And Waterfalls Of Caramel.. 
Dancing Nougat In The Meadow 
Sings A Song Of Satisfaction To The World

of course we're simple creatures.
even if we try our hardest not to be. we fake certain things to pretend that we're more unique than we're giving up for.
we sell ourselves into disliking music/clothing/people/lifestyles because we feel they're too cliche or too shallow or etc., etc.

do you really believe in it, though? does it make you feel better, ( Read more... )

what?
saying goodbye to so many beautiful people can take it's toll on a sad, sorry heart.
so, i'm just going to sit here and eat mcdonald's until i can't feel feelings anymore.
or my heart palpitating.
ian's IT party was a mind-blowing BLAST. i got so drunk, but still remember most of it. or at least clips and phrases.
me and ian got into a tussle and ( Read more... )

yes, i have too many regrets.
but i want you to know that you were never one.

you know what's really bittersweet?

having girls tell you that they "always thought that asians were supposed to have small penises."

what makes you roll your eyes?

when folks (especially including myself) get hypocritical and don't even notice it.

when acquaintances suddenly get "too cool" to say hello or even acknowledge your presence.

passive aggressiveness makes me roll my eyes, big time.

thinking that talking loudly substitutes a good rebuttal will have me rolling my eyes in no ( Read more... )

guide to fighting multiple enemies
(inspired by perilous times!)

1) be aware of your surroundings, at every possible moment. as with all physical confrontation, try your best to keep a cool head. try and talk your way out of it if at all possible.

2) if you can run, you'd better. i know it sounds like a really pussy thing to do, but let's be serious: ( Read more... )