I wrote Aaron a letter and then decided against giving it to him. I realised the other day that he does what he does, not cus hes a rude fuck and not cus he doesnt care, but its just who he is. All the time i was with him, i kept telling him, "This pisses me off..." "Don't do this..." And in my mind, i clcked up so many flaws that he had. I try to ( Read more... )

Hey grrrls and boys. Here is what i have written so far of my story. Some of it i re wrote from last time, so if you think you're reading the same thing, you're not. Tell me what you think please as feedback would be greatly appreciated. Love to you all. Em. xXx

Prologue

I was curled, cradled, sleepy and content in a tight tube of muscle; ( Read more... )

I'm eating dried fruit & listening to Lauryn Hill with half closed stonner eyes that are begging for sleep. This is such a sad way to spend a Saturday night- Making dinner for my little brothers, washing up &tidying, putting my borthers to sleep, watching a film then getting stonned and being a computer geek. ENTER- FUCKING -TAINING.

Phoebe, ( Read more... )

Fuck the detox. I did. I got desperate after a day and rang Aaron and he sorted me out. I know have no money but nevermind. I know that if i ever get stupidly desperate, i can get weed in exchange for sexual favours. Whore myself whos had it all from me before...no problem. I rolled myself a joint earlier and got stonned by myself and now im ( Read more... )

I felt shit shit shit last night. Aaron didtn come over as he promised, so i assumed that he didnt care enough about our relstionship to come back to Peasedown and talk to me about us. So i text him and finshed it. I didnt wanna finish it through a text. Obviusly. But the cowardly bastard turned his phones off to avoid me,, so i text him. I was not ( Read more... )

I spent today n yesterday holed up in my room. i went through alot of CDs i forgot i had. listeining to my music n not shitty hip hop feels good.I tidied my room from tip to toe cus im obsessive and it makes me feel happy. last night i coudlnt sleep as i havent smoked any green over the last two days.but a bit of detox is all good. today i went ( Read more... )

It is so unnerving that im not on my period yet and i have been sick twice. I wish...xXx

* Stop smoking cigarettes

*Stay in touch with the Beautiful People

*Get healthy

*Get some kind of qualitfications, go to evening courses

*Get a job, save money n move the fuck out of Peasedown

*Be happier. Be less of a moody bitch.Get someone professional to talk to and finally stop cutting

*Finish my book

This year has been alright in terms of my ( Read more... )

Hvae to play in Bridgewater next thursday. people, PLEASE come n watch me. plus its fancy dress. xXx

School was alright, felt the same degradation of being round teachers n people i dont like n want to blow up with a stare. The Porter Butt was good. Met some random drunk trevs n enjoyed some semi good metal ( Read more... )