back

[dv]

First off, lemme say that I know it's been a while since I've posted. I've been kinda busy, what with trying to bring peace and order to the universe and fighting rebels and trying to convince my kids into at least TRYING to have some semblance of a relationship. I swear, they're so fucking dramatic. I call up all nice on the phone and say "Hey,

Comments

[genepool23]

Welcome back, my master. Glad to see you are still with us.

[yojimbo]

i guess a lightsaber's better than carrying around a real sword tho.. less space and all..

and I totally dig the whole anti-Yoda sentiment you said. The badass was count Dooku, no offense to you Anakin.. I mean Darth.. after all you did slaughter an entire camp of Tusken Raiders (serves those bastards right for gangbanging your mom.. oops! I mean.. being so mean to your mom).. so you're pretty badass too!

Keep the dark side strong!

Re:

[dv]

it's better than carrying around a real sword, but, you know, like Indiana Jones showed us... swords are gay compared to a good pistol.

and Count Dukoo can bite my wang. I hate that fucking chump

Re:

[yojimbo]

look at it this way.. you sacrificed the limb, and got the galaxy in return

[y0da]

and I totally dig the whole anti-Yoda sentiment you said. The badass was count Dooku

What the fuck? So you dig the whole asthmatic breathing, black cape wearing, condom head, deep voice thing?

Being a Jedi© is more than just being a badass in a dark suit killing innocent Tusken Raiders.

I've been in many more battles than it seems, just that Lucas shows the fine points because that sells movies.

What you don't see very often, is that Darth is a softy. Go in the break rooms when he's watching sad movies like "A.I." and you'll see him crying and coughing like a child. When he sees you, he's all like "I think I've got something in my eye. Go get a doctor!", even though he wears a gigantic full faced mask, that even air has to go through a special filtering device.

And I died with respect. Did you see Darth vanish when he died? No, you didn't. [Speaking of which, it makes me wonder about Qui-Gon.]

So yeah, I've got my reasons.

[broin]

I love you.

*weeps happily*

[revunit001]

DV, your back! I thought you were dead...again.

legs

[ferret4]

There's been rumours going around that obi-wan is responsible for some much of you being mechanised - is that true, or did you loose some legs with your lightsaber going off? That football example sounds anecdotal...

Re: legs

[dv]

man, that fucktard Lucas got me to sign a confidentiality agreement saying that I wouldn't tell people what happens.

of course, I regret signing it now, but jeeze, 5 grand seemed like a LOT of money at the time