My dear, you have a beautiful heart and wouldn't want to live without it. Honor the hurt just as you honored the lust....it's all part of the, admittedly difficult, process. You deserve the life you want. Go grab it by the balls.
mine is throbbing with empathy for yours. i know what it is to long for predictable functioning without the mess of emotion. i don't think either of us would really survive for long that way.
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::hugs for you::
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