thanks to minha for the words of consolation. as for the rest of you i'm not mad just kinda dissapointed. a few of you (*ahem* cassie) have a good reason. some of you this cold shouldering was indeed deserved but from others...well thanks to those who didn't say anything, you finally facilitated the spiral i needed i'm not afreaid anymore...

i have come to a very disquieting realization. i have not spiraled yet. it's weird...no weird's not the word for it, it's...it's...terrifing. my tumble from the brightness of happiness, normally a prompt forty seconds after the event of happiness occurs, as not in the time of two weeks, reared it's ugly head. this feeling of wellness persists. and ( Read more... )

well i stole cassie's journale rating quiz,(seems like i'm stealing alot of cassie's stuff, sorry cass!) but anyways i took the quiz and heres what i got.
( Read more... )

well ladies and gents life is good. very good indeed. i have no idea why but it just is. i feel free for once in my life. i seen no looming pain or sadness. life is just good. anyways it'll probably spiral slowly downhill soon enough. but for now...random survey stolen from cassie! please comment your answers. please don't comment if you don't have ( Read more... )

well say thankya to all who gave helpful comments to tuesdays post. umm...namely minha and cassie. you guys are great. *tear* well school will begin soon, that should be interesting. you know it scares me shitless that in two years i'll be off to college. it's weird last year i was looking forward to it so much but now... anyways with school comes ( Read more... )

hmm update... there is so much for me to say and so little space to say it. you never know what's going to be important later. i'm miserable with myself again. no noones dumped me. this time it's me that did the dumping. i'm worried though becuase i'm such good freinds with this person i don't want to lose what we have. but i'd rather lose what we ( Read more... )

any manic depressives out there? my guess is there's a few, there's even one sitting in front of this screen, typing this journal, or so i theorize, granted this person is so fucked up anyways that it could be easy to mistake one of his other insane manurisms for manic deppression. perhaps i should explain my reasoning for why i'm writing about a ( Read more... )

hmmmmmm yes it seems that scolding is in order. i'm sure it's been over a month since i last posted and i have been bad since them. my life? gods where should i start. i suppose the beginning is the best but where in god's name, or hell (depending on where your're at with that) is that. i've sat at home for a goodly long time. doing nothing can be ( Read more... )

i've not posted in a good long time and i'll lash myself with a wet noodle later. but for now my life so far. cassie is back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yes! i had origanly intended to complain about her not being here again, when on a whim i decided to pay her journal a looksee and when i look what do i see but cassie's writing staring back at me ( Read more... )

i'm worried about cassie. she hasn't posted since april and i haven't heard from her since longer than that. every so often i check her journal to see if she's posted and always she hasn't. i don't blame her for not posting or getting ahold of me. i haven't been the friend she needed me to be. *sigh* i hate myself for it. i try so hard to be the ( Read more... )