I might know how to roll a kayak back upright, but baby this is a fuckin ocean liner on the rocks and that's just a little bit different.

( Read more... )

When, at the end of the week, I find there is more left to say, something pent inside that must be left in this week, and I realize there is no one to say it to who would not find it strange and awkward that I was talking to them, I guess I am supposed to say it to my journal, I guess I am supposed to sit down with it's black cover, lick it's white ( Read more... )

it's turning, and it's going to turn up side down. And then I'm going to stomp on it and smash it in to the side of the brick building two doors down. If you're here, you can help me ( Read more... )

inevidablity become reality and it all pushes in on us so meaningfully we want to be sincere toward it all.  to most I'm not being a good friend, or a good citizen of the world, or a good daughter-in-law, or a good patient, or a good role model or a good employee. But good things are happening! Blueberry pie, a new bike, tests that go well, ( Read more... )

If there were anything to say, I would be saying it.
so don't ask me why I'm so quiet all the time.

I don't feel all that great actually,.

In no time I will be packing boxes. I'm ready to leave this apartment. I hate moving, though. I hate how everything has to change shape at once, and none of it very well. It takes a long time to settle. I hate "first-nights" in places. I hate the unfinished, unknownness of it. I hate searching through boxes for silverware, or washclothes, or ( Read more... )

Sometimes days are like this.
Some points in life pin you to the board and you realize you haven't moved all that much since last time.
Some days shouldn't happen. This probably isin't one of those days, but it feels like one.
I can see the surface. I just can't get there fast enough.

I did some things today that I'd been putting off doing. One thing I'd been putting off for a year. It felt good. I also took a walk with Jess and Caddie and opened my door and let March stomp her way on in. It felt wonderful. next week is spring break which means I better work my ass off and catch up in school while I have the chance.
I wanted to ( Read more... )