I am so worried about my long-time friend.  He's just turned 39 years old and he lives  in my hometown.  He w as diagnosed with a serious heart disease.  I had been having dreams of him so I  tried calling him all day yesterday.  Today I called again and his Mom answered (he lives at home).  She sounded really tired and stressed out.  She said Bob ( Read more... )

It's funny how a journal is the one place you are supposed to feel you can say what you feel, right?  If I put this down in writing somehow it will haunt me.

Have you ever made a HUGE mistake?  I'm not talking little one, i'm talking gigantic life-altering, life f**king mistake.  This mistake is now my albatross that I will carry around with me till ( Read more... )

I got a call today from my gynocologist's office.  They want me to go to the radiology center for a diagnostic exam for some thickening or density (something like that) on my breast.  Don't know which one.

Does anyone know what the diagnostic exam entails?  It's apparently more involved than a regular mammogram.  I'm not really worried, but it ( Read more... )

Life is crazy, isn't it?  If I look back to my life at every 5 or 10 years so much has changed.  I am not remotely the person I was ten years ago.  Having Xander has changed many aspects of my personality.  I'm more patient, more attuned to world news, and I'm choosier about the people in my life ( Read more... )

Tomorrow, May 26, would have been my Mother's 81st birthday.  She has been gone since I was 12 - August 17, 1978.  It's strange that only twice a year I recall, with amazing clarity, every moment leading up to losing her.

Fast forward to the present.  I had a neighbor that I lived next door to for almost 10 years.  We didn't become close friends ( Read more... )

Well, I got Xander off the bus this afternoon and the bus aide was helping him off.  Her face was all red and she was upset.  She then told me that a bunch of kids at the front of the bus that were more "behavior problems" all started f**king SPITTING ON XANDER.  Not just one kid, but a BUNCH of them.  She was trying to stop them, and she was ( Read more... )

 Crazy week, as usual.  I swear I'll never know a boring one.  I guess that it sounds like a great thing, but the excitement is rarely the fun kind.
On April 30, Whoozy will be gone for 5 years.  I miss him so much.  I can't believe it's been 5 years.  He was such a huge part of my life.  I know it sounds pathetic, but I actually have my new Mother' ( Read more... )

That's it.  I have just had a major spirit boost!  Xander's afternoon bus driver and his aide, Miss Barbara, just had to ask me a questioin when Xander was getting off the bus just now.

They were wanting to know if I was a dancer because I had dancer's legs!!!!!  I told me I used to like to belly dance, but that was years ago.

They said that settled ( Read more... )

La la la.  Here I am.  I wanted to put something fascinating for my first entry, but I had ten cups of coffee today and I am wired to the hilt.  I need to take my (drum roll please) Xanax.  I wanted to get on here so that I could see what my friend Sue is up to.  I had a journal about a year ago, but I stopped posting in it.  I'm hoping for better ( Read more... )