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[elengul]

I've decided to not apply to full time graduate school this year. I've let myself fall too far behind on applications for me to be able to apply to a reasonable number of schools on this short of order. This decisions has several benefits

Comments

[hypersurfaces]

I hope that you did tell the people who you would want to recommend you that you'll ask them for the favor next year so they'd better remember how good you are?

[elengul]

Yes, I did that. Two of them just said "OK," and the third pretty much gave me an open invitation to come by and talk about graduate schools or physics.

[rowena742]

I'm going to play devil's advocate, too, but it's the last reason that worries me. If you're having trouble with key portions of the application and the statement of purpose in particular - why you're applying, why you're qualified, why these schools - then reassessing is absolutely a good idea. But based on my own experience, I can't help wondering if your concerns about your current qualifications are the reason you're falling behind. And if that's the case, you need to fight that kind of introspection, because it's not true and it's only going to paralyze you more.

[elengul]

I don't think I'm concerned about my qualifications. I mean, I was just having huge difficulties getting myself to do these things. I mean, I'd get a sentence or two done, then I'd get distracted by the internet. I'd get away from that distraction, get another sentence or two done, and get distracted by something else ... and so on, and so on, and so on. It took me well over a month to get my statement of purpose to anything resembling reasonable, and I think it COULD be a lot better. Part of that is that I, with a deep and abiding passion, hate writing about myself. I'm concerned that there could be other parts influencing this foot-dragging that I'm not seeing. I would really hate to get a year or two into a PhD program, wake up one morning and say, "I don't want to do this."

[rowena742]

Fair enough, but if you don't manage to ferret the reasons out after a little more talking to people and going over your life goals, I wouldn't keep digging for them. Sometimes wanting to do something other than come up with a marketing pitch for yourself is just that.

[hypersurfaces]

I don't know what it's going to be like for you taking a 60%+ pay cut. A high income seems important to you. I worry about how discouraging it may be for you to make only $20,000/year until you're 35. I hope the life of poverty thing isn't a big psychological part of this (especially because you have a cushion of savings now, and student loans, if you still have them, will be deferred again I think), but I can see where it might be?

[elengul]

Some of that may be a factor. I don't have a cushion of savings ... not really. I've been paying down loans and whatnot (whatnot being having fun by treating myself to a vacation to the Caribbean, getting books and video games whenever I want, etc) ... the loans being the bigger thing. I think, though, that I could leave this all behind, as it were, if a PhD was something I wanted enough.