So here's the big plan.

In the spring I'm applying to a program to teach English in Spain. If I get the job, I'd be living south of Madrid for a year. Basically a complete childhood dream come true. Now I guess we just sit back and see where life takes me.

It's such a beautiful day outside today. I think we've all done something to deserve it.

I'm not rich. I'm not powerful. I'm not perfect. I'm not scared.

He may never learn it about me, but sometimes late at night I get scared and I play the saddest songs I love on repeat and let myself sink for an hour or two into the sweet misery I used to know.

I hope one day I'll be brave enough to trust him to love all of who I am.

In two months I will turn 21. So I guess it's time to start getting ready for a new year.
1. I'm going to start taking ballet classes next week. I've always always wanted to do it just for funsies, and being accosted by Gravey about my weirdly high arches and pointy feet just gave me a push in the right direction. Friday's the big paycheck. Saturday ( Read more... )

Dear T.J. from about three years ago ( Read more... )

I think maybe it has a lot to do with that fact that I grew up with significantly older siblings, but I always feel like I'm not quite Generation Y or Generation X. I'd say I'm Generation XY, but that just makes me sound like a boy.. Hmm.
RIP Farrah and Michael. You were both big parts of my childhood obsession with pop culture. And somewhere ( Read more... )

The life updates:

1. Being home has been amazing. Family, friends, food, random encounters with new parts of old relationships of all kinds, everything about it has been good.

2. As much as I wish I could stay here forever, I can't freaking wait to get back to the city on Sunday and hang out with Gavin. He's kind of awesome.
3. No Bonnaroo after all ( Read more... )

I want to say that today (or more yesterday I guess) was the best day of my life. I find myself saying that an awful lot lately.

I woke up and realized the childhood I had really was funny and a little wonderful despite all the things I'd thought it was before. Who knew everything would add up?
It all feels like magic lately. Like my life is some ( Read more... )

I know I always pull the "Oh my god we're all growing up so fast, look back and be nostalgic" card, but tonight was the first time I've really felt the change, the shift, the big fucking transition. Things really aren't the same anymore. Not even in spirit. Not even in how much I miss them.
I spent the night hanging out at Nic's marveling at how ( Read more... )

I've never been happier than I am right now at this moment. And from what the rest of the year's starting to look like, I can only see it getting better from here.
I feel like I'm entering a new phase. After years of being so uncomfortable with myself, here I am, completely self-aware and making better decisions. I feel like I'm coming out of a ( Read more... )