This journal, you know-- mine?
It isn't for you to read.
It's for me.

But i don't need this journal anymore.
i won't make any entries at all.
No "Private" ones. No "Friends only" ones. No "Public" ones.

I've got a real journal in my desk.
A journal none of you can bitch at me for.

( worrying myself sick )

( your heart isnt in it anymore )

happy.
-i've lost 5 pounds.

YOU'RE the bitch who always complains about me. Who is never satisfied with anything that i do ( Read more... )

( i drive up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down )

( betsy! you're getting boring. )

This year, the one goal i want to achieve i will achieve, is to gain self confidence.
Even if it is just a little bit, i would be satisfied with that.

I don't want to complain anymore about how i feel about myself.
So i'm not going too. They're thoughts that have no need to be spoken.
I don't want this to control me, i really don't. it exhausts me.
( Read more... )

this weekend he told me i was beautiful.
and for the first time, i truly believed him.

but i can't help but feel like i'm slipping. even just a little bit. i know i am.

( without flinching )