( Read more... )

I have always wanted the rainbow pack of Sharpies. Now that I have it, what the hell do I do with all of these?!

Dear Amanda Corris,

Are you in Stratford? I am only here until Saturday and I needs you.

Sincerely,
CALLME

(5 minutes later)
Actually I am pretty sure you are no longer here dude. Excuse me while I go cry into some banana ice cream. Banana ice cream? What the fuck?

In twelve hours I have a dentist appointment, which means I have to start popping pain killers now. I don't know what is wrong with these people. Troubled childhoods, dead marriages, or low pay--who knows. Whatever the case may be, my gums always seem to suffer the brunt of their frustrations over what I perceive to be their misfortunes. I once had ( Read more... )

I don't think I've quite become Her yet.

9:16] me: can i post ads for rating communities
[9:16] abc: lol yes
[9:16] me: ok good
[9:16] abc: JOIN SOUPER HAWT
[9:17] me: JOIN BRUTALSEX
[9:17] abc: LOLBRUTALSEX
[9:17] me: ows
[9:17] abc: i love it
[9:17] abc: FUCK THAT HURTS
[9:17] abc: get it
[9:17] abc: ..
[9:17] abc: =/

Since I'm taking two writing-based classes this fall, I have resolved to start typing with proper punctuation and grammar. I usually make even the most normal phrases look as ridiculous as possible, which started out as a running joke but has become a regular practice.

Recently I was told that an individual said of me, "I don't get her." Both ( Read more... )

Another ferret infestation today. This time I have visual evidence.

( behold. )

I came home from going away this weekend, and as I was unloading my backpack a ferret randomly came at me from the other side of my room. What the fux0rz. Get out of here!!

I've been up since 4:45 and got dressed and back under the covers at 6. And started working on my research paper. I've officially gone insane.