School - things I dislike about myself

Oct 13, 2009 13:44

Dear self ( Read more... )

school

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emberleo October 14 2009, 05:13:10 UTC
Somehow I'm not surprised ;)

--Ember--

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ravenschild9 October 13 2009, 22:10:32 UTC
*Big Hugs* I am sure it will be ok. Sending you positive thoughts.

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emberleo October 14 2009, 04:49:45 UTC
I'm ok. It's annoying that I still have to fight myself every time, but at least I'm used to it, and more importantly, I know how.

--Ember--

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tala_tale October 14 2009, 00:16:12 UTC
Anxiety sucks. I hope your day got better!

*hugs if you want 'em*
Tala

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emberleo October 14 2009, 04:49:02 UTC
*hugs back* I'm ok now that the assignments are in. My brain has a "Well, there's nothing we can do now" mode that it clicks into when I'm past whatever is deemed "the point of no return", which, for assignments means once I've turned 'em in.

--Ember--

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tala_tale October 14 2009, 05:36:38 UTC
Well, that's something anyway -- glad you're doing better!

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divasm October 14 2009, 04:31:45 UTC
If it helps, I get this anxiety too. I say this because I think I'm pretty good at hiding it so you may not have known that. But I always get that initial fight-or-flight "Oh shit what have I done, I'm in over my head" feeling when I start anything new, really. I was a wreck when I started at ILM. :)

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emberleo October 14 2009, 04:47:32 UTC
I actually didn't know that, though I'm also not shocked to hear it?

The thing that frustrates me is that it's *not* new. I've taken classes from 2 of the 3 professors I have this quarter before. All my classes are within my department. I've been at this school for a year now, and I've been in college for how frelling long?

I get this stupid fight-or-flight always when I have an assignment that feels like it took serious work to get out, before I turn it in. Once I've turned it in, I guess something kicks in to say "there's nothing I can do" and I let it go, but between when I start the assignment and when I turn it in, I'm a wreck holding myself together by sheer force of will.

I noticed something interesting the other night, with perlandria keeping me company while I worked out my calendar for the quarter.

While I'm anxious, and in the planning stage of something - while I'm thinking about it - I crave sweets ( ... )

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divasm October 14 2009, 05:24:40 UTC
Yeah, it's still a new class - it's understandable to freak out. I can only imagine how I will freak out once I have the baby. Just keep reminding myself that I'm pretty darn and once I dive in most people are impressed with my work. I guess that's a way of saying, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it people like me." :D

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emberleo October 14 2009, 06:12:36 UTC
Yeah, 'cause if either of us fall off the top of the Sears tower, we totally know to go limp and hope people will catch us!

--Ember--

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