Interesting Discussion of Sexism and Gender stereotyping

[emmyatthedisco]

I had an interesting talk with a really good male friend of mine at the end of school today. (Trigger Warning: This post involves discussion about the sexism and gender stereotyping the statutory rape law.)

Comments

[emmyatthedisco]

I agree that the sex laws don't really fit our society anymore. I don't really even think the drinking age matters anymore. Kids who want to get trashed will find a way to, no matter what. it's not like it's really even that hard, just show up at the right parties. I don't think our society does a very good job of telling when a child becomes an adult over all. there are people in there 20s with very childish outlooks on life, and there are teenagers with the mentality of adults.

I also agree that the majority of men pursuing younger women aren't in it for a relationship. But they way you said it, 16-year-old guy pursues a 24-year-old woman, society doesn't see it as that big a deal because the male is still the one pursuing the female was exactly the point I was trying to make. I'm not saying it's *bad*, or that it's *good*, just that it's viewed unfairly.

but your right, people inclined to be stupid will, no matter what.

[1842]

imo there need to be restrictions on things like drinking and sex and tobacco usage. even though there are few teenagers who actually obey these rules, the laws still protect them - because teenagers really are children. an adult buying alcohol for a group of 13 year olds should be punished because there is nothing okay about that, is there? can a 13 year old really understand the effect alcohol would have on their system and consent to let themselves get drunk and deal with the consequences? it just doesn't make sense to not have laws in place to protect children whose senses of judgment aren't yet fully developed...

(also, i agree with the conclusions you made in the main post hence why i'm not commenting on that and instead threadjumping!)

[emmyatthedisco]

I guess, what i'm saying is that i don't see a huge change between a sixteen year old and an eighteen year old. I have friends who will be graduating high school at 16, because they started school early. i don't think they're any less mature than the rest of us who are already 18. I can see what your saying when it applies to 13-14-15 year olds. I think that most kids are pretty much set in their ways by 16 or 17, though

[emmyatthedisco]

lol xP kay. well, cool to know we agree.

[emmyatthedisco]

it's less of a big deal here, legally, than it used to be. but it's still a social faux pause

[redorchids]

I think a lot of it has to do with society and culture as well. Where I live, age of consent is 15 and the lower limit of where people think it's normal to have sex goes down to around 13. In the town I'm from, age differences were VERY common, especially of the young-girl/older-guy variety. (Several girls in my class when I was in junior high were dating guys in their 20s. Most of them stayed together for years. And from what I could tell from how these girls talked about their relationships, they weren't any more damaging or manipulative than those of the girls dating guys the same age as them) Just another case, of course, but I do think that how a society views sex in general (including when you consider people ready to make their own decisions about it) plays a big part in how statutory rape is viewed

[emmyatthedisco]

I'm not really a fan of getting ride of the laws all together, cause they do protect young kids, at least to me. but i do think the age of consent should be lowered a bit in most US states.

There's definitely a difference between being a relationship being consensual with an age gap, and non-consensual with an age gap. Non-consensual acts are not okay, no matter the age of the persons concerned. i guess the when one is truly about to concent

[1842]

Rape should be used to describe actual rape (i.e. forcing someone to have sex with you against their will), not a whole bunch of grey zone areas that possibly fall under emotional or physical manipulation.

should there not be punishments for emotional or physical manipulation of children? i'm not arguing, promise, i just didn't understand this part!

[redorchids]

Oh, I definitely think there should be punishment for emotional or physical manipulation of children. I just don't think you should call it rape if it's not rape. :) I would like to see separate labels (rape = having sex with someone against their will = applies to all ages and all age differences and something like "abuse of minor" for cases where people take advantage of the fact that someone is too young to know what they're doing, no matter how much they argue that what they have is exactly what they want)

Does that make sense?