Why in the world would anyone want a relationship based on insecurity, how absurd is that. Ok, the entrance fee to overcome insecurities is pretty high, you know, Truth, Honesty, Respect, ..., but come on here, is that really such an outlandish thought that relationships should be based on Truth, Honesty, Respect, and the like.
In my jealousy workshop, I was getting at this very point and I didn't do it well and no one got it. One of the participants asked why we chose to be jealous and insecure (because it is a choice at least to some degree) and I responded with "What would happen if we weren't jealous or insecure, what would that mean for our relationship?" I was getting at what you said, there is a price...openness and honesty means all kinds of things have to change. It means allowing other people to affect you in new ways, it means talking about things you've never talked about before, and it opens you up to pain (real life). It's hard! And I think people would rather stick their heads in the sand because it's easier and
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Yeah, jealousy is pretty ugly, it seems to me that it is by far the most effective tool to make ones own fears and insecurities someone else’s fault and make them feel good about it while simultaneously absolving the jealous person of the responsibility for their own feelings
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In my jealousy workshop, I was getting at this very point and I didn't do it well and no one got it. One of the participants asked why we chose to be jealous and insecure (because it is a choice at least to some degree) and I responded with "What would happen if we weren't jealous or insecure, what would that mean for our relationship?" I was getting at what you said, there is a price...openness and honesty means all kinds of things have to change. It means allowing other people to affect you in new ways, it means talking about things you've never talked about before, and it opens you up to pain (real life). It's hard! And I think people would rather stick their heads in the sand because it's easier and ( ... )
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