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[end_fate]

sometimes i feel like stabbing the back of my head with a pen to get rid of the bad thoughts

fun fact: as i was thinking "thoughts" in the previous sentence, my fingers typed "touch"

sometimes i feel like stabbing the back of my head with a pen to get rid of the bad touch

Comments

[vicar]

Me like that slip.

[rivercitytecmo]

so i never log into this thing anymore, but obviously did today.

reading this, i have to ask (b/c your first sentence is something i know far, far too well): do you have OCD? uncontrollable bad thoughts (and the resultant forced 'good' thoughts that are meant to cancel out/make amends for the bad thoughts) are a major symptom of OCD. it makes me shiver to think of how much of my life i've wasted in the little have-a-horrific-thought-then-cancelitoutreallyquick!!! cycle.

also bear in mind that OCD is a form of anxiety.

anywho, i hope all is well w/ you! (awful way to end this comment, no?)

[end_fate]

hi! everything is okay. i've been keeping myself busy to ward off bad thoughts. i sleep a lot, too. i've gotten pretty good at pretending to care for the people around me and they stand convinced to the point they miss my presence when i'm absent! that makes me feel powerful. maybe in time i would really care for them. it turns out i have a "killer" personality, according to some, and urbandictionary says that it's a good thing.

anywho, i don't update this thing anymore. it compels me to seek an audience to my misery, and complain, about things in life, despite this place being barren. so feel free to contact me at 4073101612.

i don't write anymore, but people tell me i should. i think if i did then i would be inclined to change careers. i can't decide if that is negative.

[rivercitytecmo]

keeping yourself busy is a great way to fight it bad thoughts. it's the way i try to cope with it. that and taking a few minutes here and there to calm down and, though it may sound trite, breathe slowly