i feel bad. because i never go over to chayla's anymore. because i have no reason to go there really. and i think shes mad/thinks im mad at her. but im not. i just dont like going over to people's houses for no reason.
but tomorrow, i'll smoke her up. because im nice. and because she smokes like 2 hits and is fucked up lmao.

ok. just had to point this out. for the last few days. restricting. nicely. hunger pains. ooh lala. and nice ED thoughts again ( Read more... )

i dont know if i should take the fenadryl under my bed. lets see..

reasons not to1. i STILL get flashes in front of my eyes and such from it. its hard to explain, but its like when you look at the sun too long or get your picture taken.. and you have those dots. but their from the fenadryl since i never got them this much before i took it, and you ( Read more... )

i get paid tomorrow. so happy. even though it will be like 50. like seriously right around 50. and that just sucks. fuck being 15 and only be able to work weekends because laws are gay as hell and i cant work more than 2 hours on weekdays so they dont even bother. and then i cant work more than 7 on weekends but they never GIVE me 7. and i was ( Read more... )

hmmm, so today was really really boring. because i took a lot of fenadryl last night, and then i didnt fall asleep until like 2 in the morning because i was afraid my heart would stop. and i smoked like 15 ciggerettes (literally) but it kept beating really fucking slow. so then i ran in place. and it was still slow. so i was like fuck sleeping. and ( Read more... )

today chayla touched my stomach or something (cant *really* remember cuz i was kind of fucked at the moment) and then i said like 'oh dont let the rolls eat your finger' and i didnt even realize i said that, since i never say shit about body image and such for obvious reasons. and then she looks at me like im CRAZY and is like '....rolls ( Read more... )

this is my letter of recommendation.. i have to write it for adv comp (advanced composition if your slow lmao). this is the first draft (obviously). except that i changed the past tense into present tense where its suppose to be and changed things like 'i think' and such. and like, unworded some wordy sentences lmao. just a few things. iffer revise ( Read more... )

chayla says i should take no more pills. because she *really* thought i was going to die at her house. she said i was completely fucking tweaking out. i feel bad now.. i dont mean to scare people.

hmm.. ok so today, wasnt too bad, i guess ( Read more... )

i have $10. from father. the right thing to do would be spend it with kristi. on weed or something. but no. i was going to buy robotussin today, but i was really, really high allll day. and i took a nap instead. lmao. so i'll buy it tomorrow i suppose ( Read more... )