ouf

Jun 22, 2013 20:55

So there it is, in the span of a week and a half I went from being in a commited long term relationship with plans to spend the rest of our lives together to being left, quite suddenly and without warning for someone else. Feels like I'm in the middle of so much change and unknown right now, I'm spinning a lot. And work is keeping me so busy that I ( Read more... )

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Comments 12

iamkatia June 23 2013, 02:42:49 UTC
yes, welcome them all--"beauty and terror. just keep going, no feeling is final."--rilke.

isnt it funny how our whole lives can turn on a dime like that?
everything is impermanent. there's no holding on whatsoever.
grieve and keep going.

good post. great outlook.
love you, patrick.
((((hug))))

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iamkatia June 23 2013, 02:44:42 UTC
a great book for these occasions is by pema chodron called "when things fall apart". highly recommend it. she started her spiritual path after the same incident w her husband as you had w yr girl.

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envol June 24 2013, 15:07:22 UTC
I listened to it as an audiobook last summer (I like to listen to audiobooks sometimes when I'm cleaning windows), but I think I might hear it in a different light if I listen to it in this next context. It's easy to welcome things when tihngs are comfortable haha

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envol June 24 2013, 15:06:11 UTC
"isn't it funny how our whole lives can turn on a dime like that?"
that sentence nicely describes the way I felt when my mind was trying to make sense of what was happening.
It's some lesson to adapt to these changes, say yes to them and "grieve and keep going"

thank you for your words, they enhanced my feeling of "it's going to be okay, one moment at a time"

~hug~ love :)

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whimsie June 23 2013, 03:34:25 UTC
You're never alone. ;)

I can empathize on every level of what you're going through and all I can say is that the only real constant in life is change. Things will get better. xoxox

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envol June 24 2013, 15:08:12 UTC
"things will get better" yea they will, or at least they'll get different. Hope you're well.

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whimsie June 25 2013, 01:11:16 UTC
For me, I've learned in life that I can only fall so far before something has to give - to eventually get better, or as you said, get different. I'm sorry things aren't going so well for you right now. :( If you need someone to talk to I'm always around.

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grimluka June 25 2013, 23:56:05 UTC
Patrick?? C'est toi, right?

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envol June 26 2013, 00:00:25 UTC
Oui c'est moi. :)

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grimluka June 26 2013, 00:23:42 UTC
Hahaaaaa! Trop bien!! Bon - désolé d'apprendre que tu vis un dur moment, mais comme je sais que tu sais, ça fait son temps et finit par passer.

Sinon, dis-moi t'en es où! Est-ce que tu vas bien? T'es heureux de ce que tu deviens?

Est-ce que le gars de 22, 23 ans que j'ai connu serait fier de ce que tu es aujourd'hui?

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envol June 27 2013, 01:26:22 UTC
Grosse question. Je ne sais pas ce que le gars que tu as connu penserait de ce que je suis aujourd'hui, mais je peux te dire que moi je suis bien avec ma réalité présente. Je vis à Bromont en ce moment mais dans les prochains jours je déménage (je vivais avec ma blonde/ex à Bromont) et je me suis loué un petit studio à Sutton. Je suis bien content de vivre en campagne avec de la forêt, des montagnes et des lacs tout près. ça me plait. Pour le travail, j'avoue que je me voyais pas faire ça, en fait j'ai toujours eu un espèce de 'je sais pas trop ce que je vais faire' et en terme de fierté, oui je le suis d'avoir parti cette petite business qui me fonctionne bien et me garde occupé pendant 3 saisons. Et l'hiver, c'est plus tranquille, mais j'aime ça me dire que je suis les saisons et que c'est un bon moment de ressourcement. Et puis plus passionément, je suis bien content de gosser avec ma guitare, de prendre des cours d'art martiaux et là avec le temps libre en abondance, une fois dans mon studio je vais me remettre à peindre un peu. ( ... )

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