This is what I'm working on, and part of the reason I have seemingly ceased to exist ( Read more... )

it is christmas day. me and joel actually went to the family dinner thing at my moms house. i am meeting his grandparents tomorrow and i think his mom is coming up after them. fucking stressed out ( Read more... )

Feel as if the damage is irreparable. No one has the resources to help me. All of u kno a part of it. No one knos all of it. And its bad enough to make me too scared to try and fix it. And theres nowhere to run away too. I kno ur all sick of this and im sorry. I wish i hadnt let it get this bad. But thats what i do. I push too hard thinking it wont ( Read more... )

moving into a new apartment today with joel and spoon ( Read more... )

i know i know i know ( Read more... )

i have no idea what i want to do anymore

i'm back in portland, maine.
in fact i am getting a place and moving here for a little while. if anyones still here, please call me so i can be a little less bored.

yea so i know yer all sick of hearing about how much im fucking up
but im fucking up
in SF right now.
hafta go.
more later.
love.

i'm in portland oregon.
joel sent me a message to call him. i'm going to. but i think he's going to be mean to me. i think i need to get out of the library and face humanity. aaaargh. got adopted last nite.
um.

so uh, i'm in petaluma ( Read more... )