1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 23.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next three sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.

"Electroshock therapy, mind-numbing ( Read more... )

Knock if off you sadistic little twit. If you show up near my house again I'm gonna see what bird-shot does to winged infants.

I forgot that one of the side effects for me of having to wake up early is that I wake up with raging nausea: the earlier I wake up the worse the nausea. My mother used to joke about Immaculate Conceptions, and later Immaculate Contraceptions, when I was in high school and used to vomit nearly every day before class.
The earlier I have to wake up ( Read more... )

WARNING: long, confusing, vague, and possibly self-pitying rant ahead ( Read more... )

Well, I have a job, at least for the next few weeks. It means I have to get to work at 4:50 AM, which hurts me more than you know, but at least the bills will get paid.

http://images.tribe.net/tribe/upload/photo/3d3/df4/3d3df448-2f12-4f9e-8900-17d04250be5e

"...last nite I found my Self in a small orgy and your name came up...."

That's right bitches, my name comes up at orgies. A life goal I didn't know I had has just been realized.

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=21689

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdxkVQy7QLM

trust me

Social interactions are frequently a difficult thing for me. The various phobias and frustrations of casual contacts aside, I place very high demands upon friendship. The forlornly young history of my intimate social life is a steady stream of lessons in learning to limit myself. I must limit my curiosity, limit my desire to express and share ( Read more... )

Listen to Nick Cave's "The Weeping Song."

Now replace "weeping" with "fapping"

this mental scarring brought to you by the strange slappy noises in the background.