I have just read an article that disturbed me greatly at first, but of course (as you would expect with me) I HAD to explore it further.. I have been really sick the past few days and unable to sleep, and still I find myself sitting here with an awful exhaustion-tick.. I get those when I long periods without real rest.. I will forbid myself to ( Read more... )

I GOT THE NEW TEARS FOR FEARS ALBUM ( Read more... )

I'm finally getting out of this town again.. out of this state.. I don't think I could have lasted another week anyway, so its for the best. When I say thank God, I mean just that. Thank you God!!! If you don't think thats cool, I don't give a shit. Unless I get extremely bored this will probably be my last entry for a very long time.. I don't ( Read more... )

Ok thats not "all." I guess I should address the whole "lara getting kicked out/getting a new place/moving away/etc" thing, but fuck if I know whats going on. Shit happens, its probably happening somewhere right now but I'm hermitous as usual. Its not even by choice anymore. I just wish I could sleep. That would solve both the insomnia problem and ( Read more... )

I'm still here. Thats all.

I wish I was shivering at the food lion parking lot still.. keeping each other warm.. being together and happy. I don't want to go through this again. I've already done this, and it always turns out horrific. I wish I had as much control over my life and happiness as everyone else does.

They gaped upon me with their mouths, as a ravening and a roaring lion.
I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint:
my heart is like wax; it is melted in the midst of my bowels.
My strength is dried up like a potsherd; and my tongue cleaveth to my
jaws; and thou hast brought me into the dust of death

I look for the sun ( Read more... )

Size is decreasing ( Read more... )

Just got off the fone with Lara.. yeh predictable, I know.. Get fucked if you don't like it! She cares so much.. I wish I didn't put her through so much worry.. I don't like being this way, but I wonder if I would like myself at all or if I would go into a complete identity crisis were I ever to find a "cure" for whatever is wrong with me and be " ( Read more... )