I am a quiet, reserved man who can be shy and tense before I feel comfortable. I do find singularity of lovers a restriction in many ways as humans are more than a species made for sole contacts for their entirety of life. I am passionate and devoted when I find someone or something worth that devotion. I am not a martyr for a cause, but instead a ( Read more... )

my life = shit lately. I just am so conflicted with everything I have been doing and I don't know how to control my life. Its really starting to eat away at my insides and I can't play this unforgiving charade much longer. living a facade is the worst thing you can do in terms of how it makes you feel inside. with the exception of a few unique ( Read more... )

the days are long and boring, just kinda passing time with sleep and redundant work. I've resorted to reaing books that I should have read years ago or finished or anything. i'm going to fully embrace existentialism and read being and nothingness which will be interesting and fun. and insanely hard to understand. I don't think i'll ever become a ( Read more... )

I had a realization about some of the decisions i've made in my life. I watched the movie shopgirl earlier tonite and it made me see some of the things I've allowed to make myself think or do in the past. Also, while talking to Kristina, I was able to figure out some other things about everything that has happened lately. below are 2 excerpts from ( Read more... )

"they invented love all right but they still can't make the right plastic or metal or whatever to hold it all in. so it just keep leaking (insert water noise) all over everything (insert everything) dripping and spalshing/making music gives me an ear infection. now my equilibrium's fucked, so i'm holding onto the railing all the way down, and i'm ( Read more... )

Admiral Houley told me I should start writing a paragraph every day of the things I've done well that day ( Read more... )

2 months and it still feels like yesterday. i'm getting torn up from days like today.

-zP-

LT Smith to LT Crain: "What's up Big PiMPiN ( Read more... )

friday was a month. i feel empty without you.

i love you sooo fucking much dad. i wish you were here for one more day so i could say everything i never had a chance to.

-zP-

subject of the conversation: paul, aka blue falcon, bravo foxtrot, BF or 'buddy fucker' for you civilians.

me: ghost rider
Steve (my suitemate/paul's roommate): maytime

maytime says: i dont think he has ever had a friend
maytime says: seriously, ever
maytime says: even in elementary school
ghost rider says: lmao
maytime says: fuckin even preschool ( Read more... )