i'm alone. i always have been. and i have no reason to believe that's going to change.

love is giving someone the power to tear your world apart, and trusting that they wont.

pain is misplacing that trust.

life is a little bit of both.

what if the answer to the question what do you want out of life is nothing

i don't want anything out of life.

I just want to live.

that's all.

it doesn't work out.

oh well.

nothing ever does.

the mechanics of my body shall continue.

until the next one.

and it won't work either.

last night i had a long discussion with her about evolution vs. creation. really, on science vs. religion. i mostly agree with what she was saying, except she tries to seperate them alot more, where as I see them as different parts of the same whole. I don't really feel like explaining that right now, but if anyone has any opinions, please ( Read more... )

this is the story of the other ( Read more... )

today i deleted a bunch of emails. i don't know why i was holding on to them. they were from the other girl. the one that hurt me. the reason i've been miserable for months. i can't talk about that right now, i have neither the time nor the strength. but for some reason i had kept some emails from her, and today i deleted them. not really ( Read more... )

two days later, i still feel so much happier than I normally do on a day to day basis. ever since the fiasco with the other, i've been uncharacteristically unhappy. it's not normal. I've always been the guy that nothing affected, that nothing bothered. I guess i always just thought i was happy, but was actually just neutral. Then while I was ( Read more... )

i spent the last 24 hours with her, at her school. i got there at 6, and hung out with my friend. then she called me, and i went to her. we went to eat, and then parked the car in a park, and talked for 4 hours. it was ended by an officer of the law telling us that you coulnd't park in that park, and taking our ID to make sure we were legally ( Read more... )