The Fear

[fallen_endings]

So I haven't updated in awhile, I know. Lost the internet and just lost the interest. Seems to be pointless to really update this thing anymore, but yeah....whatever. So life lately...eh, don't really know. Sometimes, I could really less really. So I've been thinking about this whole happiness thing...is it really ever possible, again? I was happy

Comments

The Fear-is always unkown

[tiggxxx1968]

Living in the "Gray" world.Where have all the colors gone?Have they all been swept away with my happiness?I feel that I stumble blindly through time.There is no day...there is no night.Searching,always searching, for that,which...I cannot find.I wonder...sometimes through my maze...if maybe, somehow happiness belongs to ALL of the colors.Am I searching for the colors to find happiness?Or perhaps maybe, I am in search of happiness to find the colors.If it is the colors I should find first.Will they be in the form of a rainbow with my happiness at the end?If I find happiness first,will it somehow bring the colors back into my life?................This was my personal thinking as a teen.I learned though,that niether never really disappeared.They were always there the whole time.I just chose to hide them subconsciously.Never knowing day by day what was going to happen scared me.I wanted to know.NEEDED to know.But that was not something I could possess.So I ran from it.It was easier being miserable than it was to be "happy".I could control

The Fear-is always unknown

[tiggxxx1968]

Living in the "Gray" world.Where have all the colors gone?Have they all been swept away with my happiness?I feel that I stumble blindly through time.There is no day...there is no night.Searching,always searching, for that,which...I cannot find.I wonder...sometimes through my maze...if maybe, somehow happiness belongs to ALL of the colors.Am I searching for the colors to find happiness?Or perhaps maybe, I am in search of happiness to find the colors.If it is the colors I should find first.Will they be in the form of a rainbow with my happiness at the end?If I find happiness first,will it somehow bring the colors back into my life?................This was my personal thinking as a teen.I learned though,that niether never really disappeared.They were always there the whole time.I just chose to hide them subconsciously.Never knowing day by day what was going to happen scared me.I wanted to know.NEEDED to know.But that was not something I could possess.So I ran from it.It was easier being miserable than it was to be "happy".I could control

OOOPS!

[tiggxxx1968]

Must have hit the button twice????Not sur why it posted twice.

Re: OOOPS!

[fallen_endings]

Haha...yeah it does that sometimes. You're so inspiring...I love you!!!