Myth Into History, Week 3: Larger Than Life? [Thurs/1st Period, Danger Shop]
This week, the Danger Shop was set up as a creaky old dock in a harbor, with an old ship, sails tattered, moored alongside and rocking gently on the waves. The usual long tables were set up beside the dock, plates of cookies within easy reach. As for Janice (who still felt stupid about giving in to the cookie thing) herself, she was perched on a large coil of rope at the end of the dock, chomping on a cigar with her usual gusto.
"This week," she announced once everyone was seated, "we're covering the stories of two ancient seafarers: Ulysses, AKA Odysseus, and Cecrops, the Lost Mariner. We talked a little bit about the gods last week, and how they loved to screw around with mortals. These two guys here, now, they really got screwed. Did they do something to deserve it? Sure, you could say that. Ulysses could be a pretty arrogant schmuck, right? There's a reason Homer called him the man of many wiles, and by the way Gabrielle knew Homer, but that's beside the point. And Cecrops -- well, any of you know the legend of the Flying Dutchman? It's a lot older than you think. But first, a quick discussion of last week's activity: what've we learned about getting too fancy with words?"
After the discussion, it was on to the lecture. Janice pressed a button on the Danger Shop remote, and a badly CGIed watery figure several stories tall, wearing a crown and carrying a trident, rose from the waves.
"Poseidon," Janice intoned as the figure looked on impassively. "God of the sea, in case you couldn't tell. Both of these guys, Odysseus and Cecrops, got on his bad side. How? Well, Odysseus blinded and robbed Poseidon's son, Polyphemus the Cyclops. Cecrops took Athena's side in a feud between her and Poseidon. Not that a spring isn't useful, but Athena's olive tree? C'mon, that was the foundation for Greek economy right there! That decision was a no-brainer."
Apparently Poseidon disagreed, since he started to aim his trident threateningly at Janice, who rolled her eyes. "Oh, please, you lost. Ancient history, pal, get over it." The watery figure moved closer, and Janice leaped atop the coil of rope, brandishing the remote overhead like a sword as she let out a wordless yell and punched a button. Poseidon shimmered and dissipated, but not without some notable grumbling.
"Anyway, as I was saying. They pissed him off, he set out to make their lives miserable. Odysseus took ten years to get home from Troy, which you'd know if you read the Odyssey even though it missed out on a lot of details. Cecrops got stuck with immortality and one big catch: he could never set foot on land."
Janice climbed halfway up the gangplank between the boat and the dock and stood, thumbs hooked in her belt as she surveyed the class from this vantage point (for once, she got to look down at most of her students, instead of up). "Poseidon didn't have to do all the work himself, of course." She rambled on at length for a while because OMG, getting long here about Scylla and Charybdis, and the Sirens. "There was the time Xena outsang them -- you won't find that in the Odyssey."
She pressed another button on the remote, and suddenly it was nighttime over the harbor. "The North Star," she said, pointing to the glittering speck of Polaris overhead. "Travelers have used it to navigate for millennia. Last week I mentioned how Aphrodite once tried to steal it to form her own constellation. As one idiot put it --" a scathing look at Joxer -- "without it, things that go bump in the might really will go bump in the night. It's probably the smartest thing he ever said. Odysseus and Cecrops would've been lost long before Xena helped them out, otherwise."
A couple more button presses, and the North Star winked out of the sky overhead. Off in the distance there was the sound of a collision, and Janice, who was now holding the large diamond from last week's class, snickered. "See?" She hit the button again to bring back the daylight, though the diamond was still in her hand, and now several identical gems rested on the students' tables as well.
"So. Today's activity. Break up into groups of three, four, five if you really have to be that social, and figure out how you would get this sucker back up into the sky."
A huge fish leaped out of the water and dove again, gracefully. "Bonus points that are irrelevant because the rules are made up and the points don't matter if you come up with a way to get Solaris there up into the sky along with it. Now get cracking!"
[[ Class Info and Roster]]
[OOC: OCD up, whee!]
"This week," she announced once everyone was seated, "we're covering the stories of two ancient seafarers: Ulysses, AKA Odysseus, and Cecrops, the Lost Mariner. We talked a little bit about the gods last week, and how they loved to screw around with mortals. These two guys here, now, they really got screwed. Did they do something to deserve it? Sure, you could say that. Ulysses could be a pretty arrogant schmuck, right? There's a reason Homer called him the man of many wiles, and by the way Gabrielle knew Homer, but that's beside the point. And Cecrops -- well, any of you know the legend of the Flying Dutchman? It's a lot older than you think. But first, a quick discussion of last week's activity: what've we learned about getting too fancy with words?"
After the discussion, it was on to the lecture. Janice pressed a button on the Danger Shop remote, and a badly CGIed watery figure several stories tall, wearing a crown and carrying a trident, rose from the waves.
"Poseidon," Janice intoned as the figure looked on impassively. "God of the sea, in case you couldn't tell. Both of these guys, Odysseus and Cecrops, got on his bad side. How? Well, Odysseus blinded and robbed Poseidon's son, Polyphemus the Cyclops. Cecrops took Athena's side in a feud between her and Poseidon. Not that a spring isn't useful, but Athena's olive tree? C'mon, that was the foundation for Greek economy right there! That decision was a no-brainer."
Apparently Poseidon disagreed, since he started to aim his trident threateningly at Janice, who rolled her eyes. "Oh, please, you lost. Ancient history, pal, get over it." The watery figure moved closer, and Janice leaped atop the coil of rope, brandishing the remote overhead like a sword as she let out a wordless yell and punched a button. Poseidon shimmered and dissipated, but not without some notable grumbling.
"Anyway, as I was saying. They pissed him off, he set out to make their lives miserable. Odysseus took ten years to get home from Troy, which you'd know if you read the Odyssey even though it missed out on a lot of details. Cecrops got stuck with immortality and one big catch: he could never set foot on land."
Janice climbed halfway up the gangplank between the boat and the dock and stood, thumbs hooked in her belt as she surveyed the class from this vantage point (for once, she got to look down at most of her students, instead of up). "Poseidon didn't have to do all the work himself, of course." She rambled on at length for a while because OMG, getting long here about Scylla and Charybdis, and the Sirens. "There was the time Xena outsang them -- you won't find that in the Odyssey."
She pressed another button on the remote, and suddenly it was nighttime over the harbor. "The North Star," she said, pointing to the glittering speck of Polaris overhead. "Travelers have used it to navigate for millennia. Last week I mentioned how Aphrodite once tried to steal it to form her own constellation. As one idiot put it --" a scathing look at Joxer -- "without it, things that go bump in the might really will go bump in the night. It's probably the smartest thing he ever said. Odysseus and Cecrops would've been lost long before Xena helped them out, otherwise."
A couple more button presses, and the North Star winked out of the sky overhead. Off in the distance there was the sound of a collision, and Janice, who was now holding the large diamond from last week's class, snickered. "See?" She hit the button again to bring back the daylight, though the diamond was still in her hand, and now several identical gems rested on the students' tables as well.
"So. Today's activity. Break up into groups of three, four, five if you really have to be that social, and figure out how you would get this sucker back up into the sky."
A huge fish leaped out of the water and dove again, gracefully. "Bonus points that are irrelevant because the rules are made up and the points don't matter if you come up with a way to get Solaris there up into the sky along with it. Now get cracking!"
[[ Class Info and Roster]]
[OOC: OCD up, whee!]