When I was in elementary school, wintertime recesses consisted of a bunch of kids wanting to slide on the ice, much to the dismay of our old-fashioned, worry-wart lunch ladies. I specifically remember one instance- I think I was probably nine or ten- where me and some other girls got caught sliding on the ice and had to stand against the wall for ( Read more... )

Writing comes so much easier to me when I'm in an awful mood; why is that? Things are fucking gravy, baby; I ain't got SHIT to complain about. I'm currently at peace living in this utter solitude-state I've grown so accustomed to, although I wouldn't cross your fingers on hearing the same response from me in seventeen days (give or take). And no, ( Read more... )

I will no longer tolerate being fucked with- literally or metaphorically speaking. I am better than what the actions I've partaken in the past portray me to be. I've been so god-damn obsessed with finding a boyfriend that I've lost track of what's important to me, my morals, my once-good judgement of others and their motives, et cetera. I will no ( Read more... )

Fuck, this past weekend was... extreme ( Read more... )

I'm in a really great mood and it's only because I found some tight-as-fuck music: The Hood Internet. Other than that, I feel utterly alone and a bit cheated out/pissed off concerning the fact I still don't fully understand then vs. than. Than doesn't even look like a word; it looks like an Asian name or something ( Read more... )

Last night was Brenna's going-away party at BW3's. I relapsed and drank three beers- mind you, it was going to just be the two, but Phil comes up to me and asks what I'm drinking, says I look really nice (minus that hook in yo' lip), so he's going to buy his little sistah a beer. What a sweetheart, how could I turn that down, jahknow? I was feeling ( Read more... )

I'm beginning to wonder if this goal-less, live-in-the-moment lifestyle is even remotely ideal. Not only do I question the ideality but also the helpfulness. If I keep taking the "easy way out," I will work as a dietitian assistant at Columbia. St Mary's well into my 40s with a handful of fresh new 20-year-olds with bright futures. Quietly ( Read more... )

"I feel like the past couple nights have been some sort of fucked-up, low-budget VHS that I'm watching while I'm on acid or something. You know, with those white static lines and everything and really awful special effects. Unattractive supporting actors. Everything is a real blur and stuff." Upon starting out an entry with this line six days ago, ( Read more... )

There's something about typing in an online journal that feels a whole lot less authentic then writing in an actual journal. Sure, I can use cute little html codes to bold or italicize words I'm trying to stress importance upon, but taking the time to print out each and every word feels so much more raw and emotional to me. And by emotional, I ( Read more... )

I had another one of those weird dreams last night. I think I'm sick, I've been feeling extremely delirious as of late. Yesterday I woke up a billion times in the middle of the night, trying to remember if I work at 4 or at 5 am. (There is no 4 am shift) Then when I finally woke up, it took me like forty seconds to remember who stopped over (Kyle ( Read more... )