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Apr 22, 2005 12:25

hmmm. i feel as if drama is surrounding me and i hate drama. but i hate not being a good friend even more ( Read more... )

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Comments 31

insideyourliver April 22 2005, 17:03:39 UTC
if i told someone how i really felt every time they asked i would end up crying all the time or yelling, i dont know..i think something bad would happen. maybe the fake part is the part where you are protecting and thinking of others before you burden them with your problems..maybe they see that you dont need anything more on your plate...maybe they are trying to do what's best. i'm sorry i'm not real enough for you. i try, i really do. i just feel like if i told you everything that makes me feel horrible inside it would only make you feel bad too. you are the greatest person i've ever met shannon. you brighten my day..and i'm sorry for making you listen to what i do end up spilling to you. i love you more than you'll ever know.
love, stephany

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farrettrock April 22 2005, 20:09:43 UTC
oh stephany. i dont feel any negitivity toward you at all. its just the big picture. you know? and yes... you never EVER tell me things i dont want to hear. that is what a best friend is. someone to talk to who really, truely cares.

as for my entry... maybe i was just a little too mad at the world when i wrote that. sorry to all.

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insideyourliver April 22 2005, 20:13:53 UTC
i'm glad you don't hate me..haha.

i never thought you did***

yeah..i havent been in the greatest mood today.

love you.

p.s. don't be sorry. please don't...it will only make things worse. or not i don't know..nevermind. you have the right to say what you want and be heard! everyone does!

you're great!

"clan'o'platipi"

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ourxdemise April 22 2005, 17:49:00 UTC
the truth hurts, thus being fake is the last alternative. if everyone was truely real then we'd all still be miserable because we'd find out all the things that people really think/say. sometimes i like not knowing because it's easy to hold your head up. i know what i'd say if i could say everything i've ever wanted and it scares me and even so those are just thoughts and i usually end up changing my mind later. there's good in all people you have to believe that. but being "fake" is the biggest way to mask all your fears. because in reality; we're all scared. insecure. overbearring. two-faced amongst ourselves... fake

its easy to hurt people and then feel bad about it. but in the end you're just hurting yourself... so it's self pity.
when someone says "i have no regrets" its a lie. because you're always battling yourself.

not sure if this means anything, just no one is ever truely happy.

.love.

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mosh380 April 24 2005, 18:50:26 UTC
I have things I dont like about people but I still love everyone. I dont hate anyone. Am I a fake because I dont tell people what I think about them? Does It really matter what people think of you? It shouldnt. If you care what other people think of you then you'll never be happy. Besides, everyone is different.

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insideyourliver April 24 2005, 20:47:08 UTC
how can you say you love everyone? how do you know? it is impossible to really love everyone. it's hard enough to love a few. its logic to not care what others think of you..but thats not the point. the point is being fake..if you can't tell whether you're fake or not..you probably are, mostly because everyone is. if you find yourself becoming a totally different person then who you truely are..you may very well be a fake. but there is a difference between being a fake to others and a fake to yourself. fake to others is a way to guard your heart, a way to keep others from hurting. fake to yourself is making yourself believe you are something you aren't. and the only thing i can say about that is: lame.

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ourxdemise April 24 2005, 21:33:02 UTC
well i just don't understand what just happened here...
you contradicted everything like 10 times.
being fake to other people and being fake to yourself is one in
the same.

think about it.
if you're fake to other people you're masking what you really feel on the inside, same with being fake to yourself... theyre the same thing.

i do think its possible to have a certain love for everyone, only i wouldn't so much use the word "love" more like "kindness" or "compassion" for other people. ya know?

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farrettrock April 22 2005, 20:13:11 UTC
nope. true happiness is a myth. but you gotta live for the moment and hold on to those small amounts of happiness. then you can use them when your blue. thanks for giving that so much thought. it means a lot.

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insideyourliver April 26 2005, 00:21:05 UTC
well..the way it happened to me was..a certain person stopped trusting me for absolutely no reason..and contorted my view of others immensely.

so yeah..even if it means throwing away peoples freakin trust..b/c usually they dont trust you anyway.
::note::sarcasm::
why are you like that kyle, why.

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mosh380 April 26 2005, 15:54:46 UTC
you stopped trusting me first. I wasn t even thinking about you when I said that.

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allbacktome April 24 2005, 00:41:32 UTC
i'm real. find me. made of flesh, and bone, and thought... just like you.

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insideyourliver April 24 2005, 20:42:43 UTC
i've found you megan! i've found you! and i'm never going to loose you!

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farrettrock April 25 2005, 16:25:46 UTC
im sorry to have started such a mess.

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insideyourliver April 25 2005, 16:30:10 UTC
dont be..we are all just stating our opinions...sorry it had to be at your expense.

i love you.

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ourxdemise April 25 2005, 18:27:01 UTC
haha aw, no.
its not a mess just a river of opinions.
no one is really right nor wrong... but there is
a hella amount of contradiction.

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mosh380 April 25 2005, 23:13:40 UTC
Yeah way to go Shannon. You just caused more drama.jk

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