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reality...
When reality sets in and destroys you from your fantasy. I don't know what I've been thinking would happen. A relationship, heck even a friendship between Candice and myself is freaking dream city 100.
Ever look at yourself against a picture of another person that you are crushing on and can't even see you both together. I just had one of these ( Read more... ) -
up...
It's 3:42 a.m. Friday morning, I just remembered that I have to work today. I only took a half day job. However, everyday I want to go in and work less and less. I just wish I'd have had 3 more numbers on the lines of my lotto ticket last week. Even just having 2 would've given me 1.5 million. All 6 and damn over 200 mil. Every thing that I ( Read more... ) -
open...
I don't know why she would like me.
I am overweight.
I am not very pretty, I'm not a dog or anything.
But, my genes weren't the most gorgeous.
She lives in an entire different world.
These are the sad and non-confident things that go through my mind.
I have a lot of issues with my body not being smaller. I am sad and afraid of how long it is ( Read more... ) -
Candice on my mind.
Hey Live journal, my old friend. I am back and there's so much that I need to get out and share with you. I am now 47, I really am scared about turning 48 in a month. Seems I'm almost halfway to death, and I'm single. Ack! LoL...
I actually don't mind being single sometimes, but I am lonely other times, and then there is the fact that I am ( Read more... ) -
2014... Been eventful?..
Didn't let my HS kids go today, had a shooting threat at their school, I'm scared. 😞 -
Faith
It may sound crazy or even a bit foolish, but I have to stand in faith, have faith that she will one day get me, txt & phone & that well hang out & picnic in the park, watching two giant sumo wrestlers stroll by on their tandem bike. Ok, the wrestlers can not happen by and I'll be ok with that entirely.
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.
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Happy V-happy Heart Day!!!
I have been to the casino fun place with my mom today, crazy!! It was fun, then free food at Sam's club, not bad day. Nope, no crying :). Picking up the LiL one now, getting V-Day cards tossed at me, rofl, hilarious!
Was fun...
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.
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Kia in mind again...
Kia has been on my mind again. I think of all the hurtful things, ways I allowed her to use me and I wonder how I could ever want her back in my life, as I'm so ashamed & embarrassed of how I acted in pursuit of her and how little I understood & understand of dating.
How I tried so hard to impress her & convince her to like & love me back. I am ( Read more... ) -
Thoughts & Erica
I just want to sit writing, purging today, crying, but I can't. I have lots to do for others, I maybe having a depression moment.
My kids are growing, I keep thinking let the Kia memories and thoughts just pass out of your mind, bless them then tell her thank you for leaving me, works some.
I have such a hard time with this, I keep thinking who does ( Read more... ) -
Whitney Houston Death
My long inspiration Whitney Houston was found dead in her hotel room bathtub, it was sad and lonely. I can't believe she's gone Feb. 2012. 48 years young. I think of all the decisions that lead up to that moment and weep.
I started thinking again of Kia, I wanted to call and cry with her, I miss her so much, I'm weak right now, I know better though ( Read more... )