Scoprio,
Happy Valentine Daze, Scorpio! After meditating on what advice would best serve your love life, I decided to offer you the words of psychologist Carl Jung: "The creation of something new is not accomplished by the intellect but by the play instinct acting from inner necessity. The creative mind plays with the objects it loves." As I see it ( Read more... )

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THIS is the most ridiculous thing I have read all year, and I have read all your journal entries and a Star Wars novelization about zombie Storm Troopers.

"It's realistic that some people can mate for life in the same sense that some people can play the Beethoven violin concerto or other people can ice-skate beautifully or learn a new language," ( Read more... )

BRB, DRINKING MYSELF INTO OBLIVION. MY MOTHER WAS RIGHT, I AM GOING TO END UP JUST LIKE GREAT AUNT CHERYL.

NEJI, LEE: IT IS OF PARAMOUNT IMPORTANCE THAT I BORROW YOUR PUPPY.

( I THINK MY REASONING WILL BE OBVIOUS: )

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Dear Annoying Person With Stupid Hair:


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( Okay, I get it already )

I AM GIVING SERIOUS CONSIDERATION TO FORGIVING YOU.  I got home and I was like, "I AM GOING TO READ THIS, BECAUSE TRUE BLOOD IS AWESOME AND A SMALL CHILD THREW THREW A KEEBLER ELF COOKIE AT ME TODAY ON THE WAY TO MY CAR" and then two pages in I was like, "THIS IS AMAZING.  What goes with amazing books?  OH, RIGHT, WINE."  And then ten pages later ( Read more... )

JIRAIYA, I DON'T OWN YOU AND YOU STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME AND MY APARTMENT.

Basement-dweller, after all that effort, you better be able to fix my Blackberry.  WHY ARE THE KEYS ONLY TYPING IN NUMBERS AND THOSE LITTLE SIDEWAYS CARROT THINGS?

If anyone feels threatened or abused by their new....Jesus Christ, I really have to type this sentence, don ( Read more... )