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I'm A Ball Of Emotions, You've Been Playing It Cool...
I'm A Ball Of Emotions, You've Been Playing It Cool...
I've been so frustrated lately for no good reason. I don't have any outlet for it, because I'm not really sure where it's coming from, so I don't know where to start.
I'm deep into my apartment search in Seattle. I even toured a place last weekend, then proceeded to wander around on my own in ( Read more... ) -
We Were A Stroke Of Luck, We Were A Late Night Vision...
It's a chilly Sunday afternoon in March. I'm sitting in a school yard near my house. The sky's too bright to look at, as the clouds have been absolutely illuminated by the hidden sun.
I'm moving out by the end of next month. This partially due to passive aggressive statements by my mom and me just wanting to get away from everything down here. I'm ( Read more... ) -
Take It How You Want It
Either a week is extremely good or extremely bad for me, apparently.
This past week has been a good one.
After the extreme lows I hit last week, it's been pretty refreshing. I sort realigned some of my perpectives by the end of last week and it seems to have been working out.
I've tried to stop overthinking and just let things happen to me instead of ( Read more... ) -
A List of Thoughts
Things that are currently bothering me:
Living at home with my mom who doesn't listen to a word anyone says and will just jump to her own conclusions and opinions two words into any sentence I say no matter the topic.
The fact that 90% of my friends I can't relate to on any real level beyond superficial interests and chit chat.
The fact that I feel ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
I'm just not allowed to have anything good happen to me ever. Or if something good does present itself, I'm destined to screw it up quickly. I can't have anything good and not mess it up anymore.
I can't catch a fucking break and I'm getting really tired of it. It's really hard to feel guilty for all the shit life drags me through all of the time. ( Read more... ) -
Thoughts And Memories
The years peel back like pages of a book left in the gutter, never read. The words like the pages wear and fade, disappearing from obscurity like their author.
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Nobody Likes Me, Maybe If I Cry...
Life is like climbing trees. As you climb, you pick which branch to hang from, sometimes carefully or sometimes haphazardly. Some branches hold your weight, some break. When they break, you fall to the ground. Bumped, bruised, and broken, you dust yourself off and start your climb again, picking new branches. Eventually (if you survive your shorter ( Read more... ) -
Don't Believe Me When I Tell You, It's Just What Anyone Would Do
"I choose my company by the beating of their hearts, not the swelling of their heads."
I finally understand what all those hardcore bands sing about. I get why straight edge people exist (I don't agree with all of their reasons, I mean, why cut yourself off to any life experience? Plus, moderation is key with most pleasurable things anyway, but I ( Read more... ) -
I Can't Swim In The Silence Of Your Skin-Skin Please Let Me In
This living at home business is getting old quick. My mother is driving me insane. She keeps acting as if I'm supposed to know what she wants even though she never talks to me about anything. She told me today that "I know her," so I should know what she wants. Actually, I don't know her. I've never really 'known' her, which is why everyone in this ( Read more... ) -
Were My Arms To Short To Ransom You?
Edit: Hmm, LJ App seems to have failed to post my two paragraphs before my LJ Cut. To paraphrase, I'm cutting down on my 'spontaneous' behavior and decision making. As in I'm not going out every night and drinking, etc and here's why.
( My Reasons )