What happened to my sense of composure? to my self-respect? to my decisive nature? It seems I no longer understand myself in any context whatsoever. The rearranging of my immediate and extended family has caused rifts deeper than imaginable. No longer can we have civilized conversations without hidden animosity ( Read more... )

To perceive and understand: Respect, Honor, and Love ( Read more... )

I'm going to China this summer, to teach English... for a month!!! (at least ( Read more... )

January, when I last wrote: a time of bitter cold ( Read more... )

What's the use of being a dreamer, when all you dream are nightmares?

I dreamt of you. It was a nightmare in the form of a dream.

What was once scrawled on the wall of self-deceit, now still pervades my thoughts.

These tiny voices within betray me... shh, just be quiet, just shut up.

I'm so weak. so weak. Up, down... inconsistent... ( Read more... )

~ Tears ~
The tiny raindrops pitter-patter on my parade.
One is curious, two is inviting, three is intriguing
And so forth... Why do they come? disturbing...
Everything seems wonderful on the surface.
Just focus on that.
Good night.

P.S. I'm sorry. terribly and horribly sorry.

After a night of "partying" with my good friends... I return to my sanctum ( Read more... )

Mood: You know that scene in Monty Python: The Holy Grail, where King Arthur says to the Black Knight (who wouldn't say anything but "None shall pass") "You make me sad ( Read more... )

Dawning Thoughts ( Read more... )

When I read my journal entries after I've posted, I just want to scream: "SHUT UP" It's not all about you, you, you. Therefore, this entry has been revised ( Read more... )