They say write everything down helps, so here I go. For the first time in a few, maybe many years, I tried to start looking after my health, tried to actually start giving a shit and tried to actually get back into shape, which has been, well fucked. I mean I can't recall doing so much damage to myself  ever, let alone in the last six months. I've ( Read more... )

I'm not sure if i'm really awake, all of this just seems like one continues exponentially expanding bad dream, that I can not comprehend where it started, why, where it may end or when I might awake. So hope beyond any belief that anyone has ever had, that this may just be that and at some point I might awake and it was all just a bad dream. Only ( Read more... )

Today I think I might of broke Christmas, tomorrow I'll find out. I have no idea where my uncle is. And Why are there fake black roses on my Grandparents grave!

There it was just sitting there up against the back large sun window like the space was made for it, all I could think was I'll be fucked how did they get it out of there and into here, that thing weighed a ton. They really don't make things like they used to, this nineteen seventies faded fold out sofa bed was my grandparents but basically more ( Read more... )

And then all of a sudden it just ended, in one ear I could hear the nurse ask if I was lost and to ask the man over there, but the room was bare, the bed was empty and he had gone. Just like that, the most amazing person in my life was no more.

and then she walks in and stands there in line, as I'm explaining to the customer in front of her, that my work mate sitting on the counter, died of a broken heart. They stand there and say how kind he was, but how rarely he smiled, how shocked they they and a few wonder away with a tear in their eye's ( Read more... )

Information is not to be feared, just the bastards that wish to control it.

Dear people who might understand ( Read more... )

Who would of thought I'd be here a year ago, so can't believe it's April already. It really is nuts I live so close to Raj's, the smell makes me so hungry some days, love living by myself, it gets lonely but it's all my space, all of the time. starting to sleep better at night, which is wonderful, can't believe it took so long to get used to the ( Read more... )

Fine, I'm lonely, thought I was just bored, rather sickening isn't it.

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