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[fodderfigure]

I've been talking about my Asperger's/autism a lot over the past few days. I told both new people and really old friends about it and, in all cases, they reacted with a fair amount of surprise. I never know how to react to that. It makes me feel attacked. It makes me feel like they think I'm lying. And then, as it sinks in, it starts to make me

Comments

[mmarques]

I must admit, that I'm surprised to hear this, too. One reason is that you do work that forces you into social situations, interviewing people. However, from way back when we did nanowrimo and were being interviewed, I seem to remember you as being a mix of sometimes painfully shy and other times extroverted.

[fodderfigure]

The work thing is all purely accidental, really. I seem to keep stumbling into situations that force me to work on my issues in the most brutal, in your face ways.
In the case of the interviewing, I only started interning for Chart because I wanted to write somewhere and I read the magazine. It had never really occurred to me that I'd have to talk to people to do it. I credit being forced to make up questions for people as one of the main reasons I'm so functional now. Before I started doing that, I was almost completely incapable of reciprocal conversation. I'm still not particularly great at it, but I at least have a serious amount of practice.
Now I've accidentally become a group fitness instructor, which is forcing me to work on my issues with socializing in groups.

[mmarques]

Good for you! I'm no good at socializing in groups... except for groups that I've known for many years.

[andora]

*hugs*

I'm so sorry, Sarah. You seem to be dealing with it so well, that I forget it's tough to not only navigate in general, but have to be a defacto spokesperson for something you're still coming to understand/grips with.

I don't remember much of our conversation about it in the summer, except that I went on about bugs, and laughed at your MR story, which kinda qualifies me to be an asshole right there. I can't figure people who know you think you're lying, or that you don't have it that bad, etc. And if they mean it as you being a credit to your disability, well, I'm not sure what to say about that. Your strength and determination to push through some tough avenues in life on your own (as you've told me about) makes you a credit in general, and not just to a marginalizing disability.

I hope you're home safe soon, fed properly and can get a good night's/day's rest.

[fodderfigure]

I am much better now!
And don't you dare qualify yourself as being an asshole. I really, really appreciated that talk and it remains one of if not the most positive experiences I've had talking to friends about it. Plus, I'm pretty sure I was laughing, too. A lot of it funny :)

[lollerk8]

the more you talk about it the better I understand you so I love you for talking about it.

[fodderfigure]

Aw. Thanks, babe. xo

[katrinar]

i believe you, and my only shock would be that i would have never guessed that you had any form of spectrum disorder. just because i dunno why.

way to continue to be awesome.

[fodderfigure]

Thanks, Kat! I really appreciate it.

[katrinar]

YOU'D BETTER!

[fodderfigure]

WELL, FINE I DOUBLE DO!

[amarylliss]

I don't want to defend these jerks, but they probably think they're helping (I think it's the Aspie equivalent to "For a moment I forgot he was black!")

Also, I have something for you that could be very, very good, or very, very bad (but in a good way).

[fodderfigure]

In some cases, you are probably right. In others, it just seems more... I don't know how to explain it. Of course, given that something like 60% of people with Asperger's tend to assume that people are angry with them when they can't figure out social cues, I'm not sure I'm reading that right.

What is it? What is it? I want it now!

[amarylliss]

You'll just have to wait! If we're getting together for another movie night at Rachel's this week, I can give it to you then.

(I'll give you a hint: it is delicious. It is not a baby.)