I wish I could genuinely give a shit.

Instead of dong things because I have to as a facade. I literally cannot bring myself to care.

The warm and gushy ones ( Read more... )

She held my hand yesterday
many times
like she was claiming me
Like she was saying
"this is ok"
"I like you"
And I took it
soft and rough
I almost crashed the damn car
that first time
kept speeding up
Because I couldn't concentrate
on the dull black asphalt
when She
She was holding my hand

This is new
the nauseating feeling in my body
a jitteriness that sparks
whenever I think of her
Like a hangover and the flu
like starvation

And then . . . there are the nights that go right, for a change. So, so right it feels like you're everywhere and above that.

Spent the day with a girl
who makes my insides churn
I can't eat with her around
can't think
I stammer and giggle
and my body rebels
It's her laugh
her smile
like the Cheshire cat
And she smokes far too much
her cat is wonderful
it doesn't fuck with my allergies
And she confuses the fuck outta me
And I leave and fuck
I'm so fucked

Like I'm dying ( Read more... )

Even if God was more than just a human construct to comfort us when shit gets terrifying; if there was such thing as "The Word Of God" I doubt we'd even be able to understand it anyway ( Read more... )

The thought crossed my mind just now that because Stabiley-o is leaving g-star I could apply for the job.

Then this internal response.

"Well, yeah, ya could. But would do you really wanna spend your days in that depressing shit hole?"

I'd say it was your curly hair that did me in
And your lopsided smile
that damn grin
and the way you bend your fingers along my skin
all you had to do was be crooked
for me to go straight