Finding a harp player for a wedding at the end of September shouldn't be this hard. I know way too much about my mother in law's sex life. Sending your mother flowers on Mother's Day is unreliable, just send a card early. Just because someone calls themselves your best friend doesn't make them a good maid of honor. Fortune cookies lie. The idea of ( Read more... )

When I don't include Jeremy in the wedding plans he complains that he is out of the loop, but when I do, he makes comments like "If I have to look at one more pattern I am going to go crazy." He had only looked at five. I don't want to bore him or seem obsessive and I try hard not to, but he's my maid of honor. It's what his supposed to do. I love ( Read more... )

I'm going to group today for the first time in the past four weeks. I shouldn't have skipped out for so long, but I needed it in a way. I'm feeling better in general right now. There is a lot of wedding planning to be done, but I am trying not to stress out about it for now. It will all somehow work itself out in the end. I'm not obsessing over the ( Read more... )

I skipped out on group today for the second week in a row and I feel a lot better. Maybe I am just sick of having to talk about my stupid dad two times a week. I seriously need a break from it. I feel like I have really solved most of my issues concerning him. I mean, I still have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but I think I can deal with it now ( Read more... )

Lately, I haven't been feeling only slightly anxious. Thank you, drugs. You would think this was a good thing, but it actually just made me realize I'm actually depressed...or caused me to be depressed. Who knows? It may have something to do with the fact that I have been in pain in the lower back and abdomen for the past seven days, I have had ( Read more... )

I have been extremely good about going to Curves regularly for the past few weeks. I have even been dieting a fair amount. I have been losing weight, but until I have lost 20 pounds it isn't really worth counting to me. I just mainly feel like I take up too much space. I feel conspicuous. I just literally want to be smaller. I think that sound a ( Read more... )

Group went pretty well today. Katie wasn't there, and she didn't call me back this past weekend when we were supposed to do something. I hope that she's alright. She's not the type of person to blow someone off, and she has never missed a group so I am concerned for her well being. I think I'm going to give her a call sometime this week to see how ( Read more... )

Tonight I remembered why I don't hang out with girls like Lindsey. When her and Jeremy came into the Beehive, she hugged me and I told her she looked great. She thanked me. Then she spent the first fifteen minutes of our conversation complaining about how she was so thin when she was an exchange student in London and how she's so incredibly fat now ( Read more... )

Today I was supposed to hang out with Jeremy since he recently was fired and has a lot of free time on his hands. Instead I am home. I spent Monday night with him, slept at his house, and then spent the entire day with him Tuesday. I know he's lonely, but I just can't do it. I'm used to spending my days alone and I kind of like it that way. It ( Read more... )

It's time for an update. I went to Curves this morning. I decided that I am going to work out every day from now until May (it's the small goals.) It feels amazing to do something healthy for my body for once. Going to bars and inhaling second hand smoke while drinking White Russians needs to be counteracted by something. I am also going to have ( Read more... )