The Second Presidential Debate: a tongue-in-cheek translation

[freedomfry]

The second debate, translated into snark for your convenience. As before, my liberal bias is pastede on, yay! And they talked forever, you guys. It's long.

Comments

[hangedwoman]

BWAHAHAHAHA!

Very nice.

[freedomfry]

::takes bow::

Thank you!

[ladybec]

Brilliant and hilarious as always - thank you for making it a little easier to get through this absurd campaign.

Perhaps because it's what I do for a living, I found Kerry's abortion answers to be pretty horrendous. Not that I doubt for a second that he's pro-choice, but he was totally playing on their turf instead of talking about all the awful things Bush has done to prevent access to what does reduce abortions - family planning and medically accurate sex ed - rather than all the crazy restrictions that he has also enacted. And your interpretation of what he said about the global gag rule was way more coherent than the way Kerry said.

All that being said, I really can't understand how anyone with a quarter of a brain could be voting for Bush.

[freedomfry]

Yeah, his answer was exactly what The Boss used to say when talking about this issue--it's the way you couch the language to see if prolifers won't hate you. They'll hate you anyway. Total cop-out.

[griffen]

"MIDWESTERN MAN #6: KERRY, look in the camera and promise that you won’t sign legislation to increase the tax burden on folks making more than $200,000 a year."

"less than," surely? Otherwise, brilliant!

[freedomfry]

Yikes. ::goes to edit:: Teach me to put something up for the world to look at when it's 2:30 in the morning.

Thanks for the comments!

[celli]

Excuse me while I do a little dance on the excessive grooviness of the new Medicare law. It’s totally modernized the system, in the sense of “kicked it into the 1970s.”

*snort* A-freaking-men.

[freedomfry]

It totally kills me how they were both so eager to take credit for a system that is completely broken. Silly candidates. :)

[mayakda]

GIBSON: Ewww. Never say that to me again.

Heh. Great job!
But you didn't put in the sweet nothings Kerry & Bush whispered to each other after the debate! Amerika vants to know, demmit! :)

[freedomfry]

I got to the part where Bush actually says, "need some wood?" and my brain shut down, so I couldn't finish their whispers to each other.

But I'm glad you liked the rest of it!