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An obstacle surmounted
At least once. And if it can be done once it can be done again. All of the anxiety, all of the tension, all of the growing realization of the need to actively work against despair has evaporated into the wind and been carried away in a gust of light. For the last few weeks I kept asking why. I knew the answer and it scared me. It was more ( Read more... ) -
Sunday Night
This may be important but I don't know if I know it well enough to tell it. For the honoring of Life. She's speaking to me and through me and the music as it plays softly in my ears. It is night and I'm alone alone with a candle and the breezy shades of light coming down this side have I picked up a trance on the slide? And was it the ( Read more... ) -
Attachment
Any Buddhist should be able to tell you that attachment leads to suffering, that we cause our own suffering by "othering" and attempting to halt change for our own sense of pleasure. The Great Jedi Master himself knew this and shared it within the context of his own death: “Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who ( Read more... ) -
An epiphany of self
Any self-aware or self-awareness-seeking person accepts whichever teachers come her way, regardless of the perceived convenience of timing or form. A teacher can be a person or a situation. It can be positive or negative, in the sense of whether the experience is enjoyable, as well as whether the lesson garnered is in regards to learning the how ( Read more... ) -
An Undiscovered Country
It's so very strange to be in uncharted waters. I almost said that I felt I had no sense of control but that's not correct; I have plenty of so-called "control" but no foreknowledge of the route and no idea if I'm equipped to handle any of the challenges it might bring. Instead of relying on my own skills and knowledge as captain I am in the ( Read more... ) -
Liminality
Freyja isn't often spoken of in terms of being a liminal goddess, at least not in the literature that I have read or the communities in which I've seen her discussed. Yet to be the matron of sex, passionate love, and death is to be embraced as liminal, changing, fluid, ever-changing...I don't know why I bothered to feel surprised that I have felt ( Read more... ) -
Intellectual intimacy
Perhaps far stronger than a bond of physical proximity or even sexual intimacy is the process of becoming intellectually intimate with another human being. Too many people view this as an either/or pursuit between the mental and the physical, suggesting an eternal dichotomy within themselves and between themselves and others. Knowledge of your ( Read more... ) -
The Gift
I have no right to it and no precedent for accepting such a thing, but how can refuse it? False strength is its own weakness and terrible in its hold. To be so humbled and so shaken--thrilled, and terrified I said. Whether explicitly intended I do not know for certain or perhaps I am afraid to believe. Never before has another person offered me ( Read more... ) -
Admissions
Does knowing that something is false and yet engaging in it anyway make it true or real? IS a thing capable of being and yet being false ( Read more... ) -
Too much too soon...
Why does this feel like I am falling into the pit of desperate love the way I have fallen so hard before? This feeling is terrifying and utterly unjustified. There is no trust to back it up, simply a dim reliance on the distant past and the natural reaction of my heart and gut. My husband remains my rock and my anchor. Does he notice that I ( Read more... )