Wow, I just realized for what seems to be the first time ever, I've lost the will to live. The complication is that I'm too much of a coward to die though, so I guess I could be described as undead right now. Not alive, but not entirely dead either. I'm so tired of all the bullshit.

Alright people. I've been spewing my anger and crap here and I now realize that aside from Valerie, no one really knows the other people I'm considering. So here is what I like to call the Inconvenient Triangle. The three girls I'm interested in that all have something that screw it up for me ( Read more... )

Ok, so today is one of the semi rare occasions where we have a day off of school. I do all my homework and can't wait for Valerie to come over and watch a moview with me. So I talk to her through the whole day and she says she should be done and ready by 7. I tell her Lord of the Rings: Two Towers is a 3 hour movie, so if we start it at 7 it will ( Read more... )

So I go to Val's after work this evening and we talk and things go smoothly as usual around her. Before I leave I just straight up ask her "So, I've told you I like you, I was just wondering if perhaps you know if you like me?" HERE IS THE SEMI FINAL VERDICT ON IF I GO OUT WITH VALERIE: "I honestly don't know, I've been under A LOOOOOOOOOT of ( Read more... )

VeritasHydra: $20 a paycheck for gas +$40 monthly for phone = $80 a month spending money ( Read more... )

So I've told Valerie I like her right? She just kinda doesn't respond whether she feels the same way or not. So she still wants to be around me. Definite plus. We go to see Freddy Vs. Jason this evening but Mr. Treichler(spelling?) doesn't let us in because Valerie isn't 17 yet. That really surprised me. Me and Matt think it's because Mr. Gregory ( Read more... )

"Nathan you are loud! Shut up!" " 'Nathan, you are really loud.' 'And?' 'and annoying'" "Nathan, be quiet" MAYBE I SHOULD JUST STOP TALKING ALL TOGETHER YOU FUCKERS. Damn, I have been hearing that I am "loud" way too often lately. Maybe this is why Valerie doesn't like me is because so many people seem annoyed by me. Then when I don't talk or speak ( Read more... )

"She" in the other journal is Valerie Marting, an upcoming junior at Trinity High School that I have known for nearly if not longer than 3 years now. Waaaaaaay back when I was in 8th grade, we were so close to dating each other that people would walk up to us and say "So are y'all goin' out yet or what?!". Back then I didn't have any confidence at ( Read more... )

For those of you brave enough to read this, thanks for your patience. This is going to be a journal devoted to my most extreme of emotions and will explain my behavior when I'm around you or others. If no one reads this, then it may be for the better. Now that that's been said, "enjoy".