i watched harry potter and the goblet of fire last night.

i've had a cold for eleven days.

i applied at target even though i have a full time job because i want a discount and i'm there all the time anyway.

my cell phone is a piece of junk.

don't drink and drive.

if i had a marker, i'd right your name on my forehead. a purple one.

The moral of this story is that karma comes around. America, fuck yeah ( Read more... )

So...I got home late last night from North Carolina. We had a really good time. I cried a lot while leaving. The sunsets are better there. I don't care that I drove ten hours to go to the beach, when I live at the beach ( Read more... )

David ( Read more... )

I feel like fighting.

I was at work yesterday and I just started vomitting uncontrollably. I left and went to Laura's and I climbed in her bed and it hit me; fever, chills, body ache. I feel better this morning but my head weighs a million pounds and I can't stand up for longer than ten minutes at a time. It fucking sucks because I have this thing to go to tonight.

I saw Kathy Griffin last night at the Florida Theatre. I saw BB King there a few weeks ago. I thought nothing could top BB. Kathy did ( Read more... )

Remember that one time it cost me $15,000 to go to an out of state school for a year. shoooooooo. Does anyone have a dollar?

My hair is so boring. It is your typical, run of the mill, desperate trophy wife hair. The "Hey, my husband hates me and I have no reason to look good," kind of hair. People kill themselves over shit like this everyday. I need a makeover. I'm five seconds away from getting a flowbee. I will call for that shit right now and receive a free pack ( Read more... )

I have the flu and I am so nasty sick. You know, the kind of sick where your boss says, "Maybe you should go home and get some rest...for a few days." Calling in sick isn't worth it if you truly are sick. The whole point of a sick day is lying your ass off so you can sleep in until noon and then go shopping or something else just as productive ( Read more... )