Sins of the Past, Threats of the Future

[galaxygab]

in this issue
My Captain, My Stalker
Mr. Morden: Father's Little Dividend?
Centauri Cruising
New Threat To Earth?
Victim of the Vorlon....

...and much, much more...

BLUEBEARD OF THE THIRD AGE
Sheridan’s past catches up with him

Terrorist activities against the current government might be the least of renegade Earth Force Captain John _sheridan’s

Comments

[mr_morden]

(Ignore first comment. Sigh.)

WILTON KNIGHT WOLFRAM AND HART, Z'HA'DUM OFFICE.
Z'ha'dum
Our ref: 568/968/12552.130

Editors of 'Galaxy Gab'.

Dear Sir

Galaxy Gab Libellous and Slanderous Articles.We have been consulting with our client, Mr. Klaus Morden, and his associates, The Shadows, in connection to the libellous and slanderous publishing of articles in your publication

[galaxygab]

Fowarded through Willy Dernam, Chief Editor/Galaxy Gab

HOLLAND MANNERS WOLFRAM AND HART,EARTH OFFICE.
Los Angeles
Our ref: 089/2975/4763.120

Dear Sir,

Cease and Desist Order

It has been brought to our attention that you wrongfully use the name "Wolfram and Hart". Be advised that such misuse is a felony to which we will hold you fully and completely responsible.

Moreover, the Senior Partners of the most ancient and noble firm of Wolfram and Hart, whom we consulted immediately upon receiving your letter through our client, have declared that unless you immediately stop the abuse of our name as well as our trademarked paper, you might want to prepare for your future in the suburbs at once.

We have advised our client to ignore any future communication from you. Your client, however, might find the attached suits, stamped and approved by the entire advisory board as well of the Senior Partners, of interest.

Yours sincerely,

Holland Manners
\ALD5\8945.2

LOS ANGELES, BRUSSELS, NEW YORK, SYDNEY, EPSILON III,

[mr_morden]

WILTON KNIGHT WOLFRAM AND HART, Z'HA'DUM OFFICE.
Z'ha'dum
Our ref: 785/968/12552.184

Editors of 'Galaxy Gab'.

Dear Sir

RE: ADVISORY ORDER.Pursuiant your letter reference number: 089/2975/4763.120

[galaxygab]

*Following the advice from their lawyers, the Galaxy Gab staff ignores this communication and does not reply. However, Willy Dernam dictates a note to remind Giselle Burton that financial destitution has to be included in her "How Morden Found Jesus" article. "It's obvious the poor bastards can't even afford proper DNA scanners anymore," he ends. Then he dictates a second note, a memo to himself: "Remember to ask Manners during lunch whether suburbs exclusive punishment for Knight or possible for Randall, too, if Randall doesn't mail tell-all on Crais/Crichton mission soon. Do not forget wine for Manners this time. Lastly, congratulate Manners on way Rupert Murdoch's identity as secret Head of Senior Partners has remained hidden, since obviously impostors do not know."*

[_sheridan]

GRACE VAN OWEN, L.A LAW.
Los Angeles, United States of America.
Our ref: 568/968/12552.130

Editors of 'Galaxy Gab'.

Dear Sir

Galaxy Gab Libellous and Slanderous Articles.We have been consulting with our client, Captain John Sheridan, and his family, in connection to the libellous and slanderous publishing of articles in your publication

[galaxygab]

Fowarded through Willy Dernam, Chief Editor/Galaxy Gab

HOLLAND MANNERS WOLFRAM AND HART,EARTH OFFICE.
Los Angeles
Our ref: 089/2975/4763.120

Dear Madam,

Misrepresentation of Earth Force

considering that your client left Earth Force very publically and irrevocably, amidst theft of national property (i.e. the Space Station Babylon 5, build by public funding, as well as assorted weapons and other equipment), Earth Force has hired us through its commander-in-chief to present its case against him. In addition to the already named charges, your letter indicates he misrepresents himself as a member of the army he deserted and betrayed, which shall be added to the charges.

Yours sincerely,

Holland Manners
\ALD5\8945.2

LOS ANGELES, BRUSSELS, NEW YORK, SYDNEY, EPSILON III, AND ASSOCIATES GALAXY WIDE
Associated Firms: PARIS, HONG KONG, CENTAURI PRIME, MINBAR Wolfram and Hart is registered by the Law Society, Intergalactic Home Office and c.

[_sheridan]

[OOC: Am doing VERY badly atm. Will respond when am in a better headspace. Sorry bout that.]

[inbigtrouble]

OOC: No worries, doll. You take care of your own self, now. - S

[slytherinsilver]

CORNELIUS FUDGE, MINISTRY OF MAGIC.
London
Our ref: 568/968/12552.132

Editors of 'Galaxy Gab'.

Dear Sir

Galaxy Gab Libellous and Slanderous Articles.We have been consulting with our client, Mr. Draco Malfoy, and his family, in connection to the libellous and slanderous publishing of articles in your publication

[galaxygab]

Fowarded through Willy Dernam, Chief Editor/Galaxy Gab

HOWLER TO CORNELIUS FUDGE
From Rita Skeeter

Fudge,

if you're hearing this, you've messed around with time travelling to harrass the free press as well as my descendants. In that case, the spell I've used will notify me immediately.

Now, doubtedlessly everyone except simpletons are aware you're tight with Lucius Malfoy, but I doubt the public knows just how much money this convicted Death Eater spent in the Ministry's... causes. And just what he got out of it. If you continue your temporal harrassment of my descendants, The Daily Prophet and Witch Weekly will print that story tomorrow.

Howler destroys in true fashion after being heard

[captfaramir]

My lady, I feel I must request an audience with you at whatever time would be most convienient. There are matters regarding the Palantir, one of the Seeing Stones of Arda, which I can remain silent upon no longer.

Sincerely,

Faramir,
Captain of Gondor
Prince of Ithilien

[galaxygab]

I'd be glad to meet with you at the time and place of your choosing. Will this appointment be on the records?

And while I have you here, Mr. Faramir, tell me -- do these Seeing Stones of yours have anything to say on the matter of lawyers, comma, painful disembowelment of?

Perhaps over dinner?

[captfaramir]

My lady, if you wish to record the meeting, I would be amenable.

Alas, I know little about the murky ways of jurisprudence, so I am sad that I am unable to assist you.

However, dinner sounds lovely. I would be happy to escort you to a fine place of dining, though please - no latte's.

[galaxygab]

Sir, as I just had the most excellent news from my lawyers, assistance will not be necessary. Dinner, however, is still on.

Are you at all partial to Chocolate Paradise? It's a lovely restaurant in Brussels.

a warning

[lt_teeg]

I have not been on this station long enough to know anything of the mating habits of the Centauri or the Narn, nor have I met either of the ambassadors mentioned in this article. Nor am I well acquainted with Mr. Crichton, and I fail to see why the recreational activities of any of these individuals could be of the slightest interest to anyone.

Humans are obviously a bizarre species.

However, the suggestion that Captain Crais would even contemplate participating in the actions described in this article is simply ludicrous. He does not engage in sexual activities of any kind with aliens, and the idea that he would do so with Mr. Crichton is - beyond ridiculous.

Clearly your intrepid reporter is either dishonest or delusional, and in either case she should be retired at once. I trust you will retract these false allegations immediately, and refrain from printing such material in the future. Failure to do so will result in - unfortunate consequences.

Lieutenant R. Teeg
Executive Officer, Pleisar Regiment

Re: a warning

[galaxygab]

He does not engage in sexual activities of any kind with aliens, and the idea that he would do so with Mr. Crichton is - beyond ridiculous.

Methinks I hear the green-eyed monster talking. Tell me, dear, how long have you been jealaous of Captain Crais' obsession with Mr. Crichton? Why not enlighten the public of your point of view?

Clearly your intrepid reporter is either dishonest or delusional, and in either case she should be retired at once.

Now, now, insults will get you nowhere. Except, of course, in the news.

*makes notes: "Crais' Deserted Lover Speaks: He'd Never Do It With Aliens, she sobs, clearly out of her mind with distress..."*

Re: a warning

[lt_teeg]

Methinks I hear the green-eyed monster talking. Tell me, dear, how long have you been jealaous of Captain Crais' obsession with Mr. Crichton? Why not enlighten the public of your point of view?

... I am unfamiliar with this monster you speak of. Is some strange human myth? My eyes are blue -- though why that is even remotely relevant to this discussion escapes me.

I hardly think my thoughts on this or any other subject are any concern of yours. Perhaps you can enlighten me as to why, precisely, my point of view would be at all interesting to your readers?

As far as I know, Captain Crais is not yet aware of this article. For your own safety, I suggest you remove it swiftly before he reads it.

Re: a warning

[galaxygab]

*continues to make eager notes: "I was completely blue-eyed about him," abandoned lover says...*

Lieutenant, considering that Captain Crais still owes us the money for a valuable camera equipment, which he destroyed on Centauri Prime, perhaps a warning to him would be more appropriate. Does the man have any ideas what law suits can do?

As for your point of view, well, whenever a new player turns up, our magazine always tries to cover all the angles. Who knows what insights you might have? NO one right now, but they may all very soon.