what a weekend. so many things ironed out and so many others still hanging i don't know where to start. i'll just keep with the good. friday...not a good day, but a good night. its so unbelievable that my future is opening up to so many things. all the negative and just bad things that seem to be holding me back will slowly fade away and add ( Read more... )

i really don't know how i'm ever going to make it through this year. already its pretty much july and it feels like i don't have enough time to get everything done that i need to in the next few months. i know i've been saying i want this year to go by, and i do, but now its coming to crunch time. between eventually moving, buying a new car, ( Read more... )

for every step forward there always seems to be 2 or 3 steps back. i'll never understand why things must be this way. why i know this is different but i am still doing the same as always. i've become so good at pushing people away that i do it before i even realize it and then i don't know how to stop it and just get everything back to the way ( Read more... )

we'll start this off on a happy note ( Read more... )

jealousy can rear its ugly, ugly head ( Read more... )

There's nothing about her that sets her apart. She's quick witted and sassy, but so are all the others. With plain hair, and a plain face, she goes on, never knowing why the boys look her way. She asks herself every night as she removes her face and puts on her pjs, what is it that makes them so interested? I have all the usual imperfections; ( Read more... )

what happened? this is not something i asked for. i didn't want it to happen this way. but it did. and i accepted it. even grown to love it so much more than i thought ever possible. yet i continually am reminded of how apparently selfish and demanding i am. i have done nothing but try to make this situation easy; to show that i can be ( Read more... )

someday...this will all make sense ( Read more... )

had a smashing time last night. i left before the craziness of course. it was nice to see everyone in one spot again...hangin, drinkin, smokin, playin...thats the way to do it. adam, i say you are in charge of partying everyone up all summer. and yes, that is a demand. and tell your sister she's awesome. because she is...both for me and ( Read more... )

i love that i can still be amazed by the fact that someone who i have considered to be one of my best friends, no matter how long its been between visits and talks, can completely disregard all of that and just forget that i'm actually someone who's been there for her. after all the conversations, including our last, about how you never talk to ( Read more... )